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Author Topic: Things that made you sad today thread.  (Read 9703962 times)

MaximumZero

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #98370 on: October 29, 2015, 09:05:54 pm »

Update 2: Mother in law and I have largely made peace. I was being an incorrigible ass and apologized for it. Wolfeyez is still in the hospital getting her infection under control. Many of the hospital staff have started calling her Superwoman. She should be home tomorrow.
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Holy crap, why did I not start watching One Punch Man earlier? This is the best thing.
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Willfor

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #98371 on: October 29, 2015, 09:21:17 pm »

I've heard people use the term 'gay' as an insult incredibly frequently, yet almost none of them view being gay as bad.
Ugh, that's so greatorder.
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In the wells of livestock vans with shells and garden sands /
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Xantalos

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #98372 on: October 29, 2015, 09:23:48 pm »

Heard someone use the word "gay" to insult someone else in class today.

*shrug.
I do that. Or more specifically, to lament lame situations.

But for some reason, the word 'gay' is segregated in my mind into the two meanings. Like a dictionary with:
Gay:
1. (Noun) Homosexual
2. (Adjective) Bad, Stupid
3. (Old-timeytalk) Carefree, happy

Just because you can use one or the other, doesn't mean the former is the latter.

Which... probably isn't an excuse on my part.
I guess it's similar to how 'Fuck' is an exclamation of things going wrong, and also a sexual act.
If people actually confused the two, you'd get some very unwanted attention whenever you stubbed your toe.
For specificity of example, 'Fuck Me'. In Australia, anyway, any random who bangs their thumb with a hammer is likely to say it. Nobody, however, is likely to take it as a proposition.
I feel the need to reference that one South Park episode that had the kids point out their view of the difference between being gay (which they think is okay and no big deal) and being a 'fag', which they use to refer to loud obnoxious motorcycle divers.
« Last Edit: October 29, 2015, 09:25:37 pm by Xantalos »
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Willfor

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #98373 on: October 29, 2015, 09:28:45 pm »

Does that actually make it right though? It started as an actual insult. It traces its origins to an insult. We're barely ten years removed from it being a completely ostracizing term. I'm not saying you're a terrible person for saying it, but maybe you should actually think about whether your using it is a good thing or not. Maybe you should think about how other people are going to read it, especially if they've been called it as an insult their whole life. Maybe you should think about whether a person is going to actually tell you whether they're gay or not based on how they perceive whether you view it as a positive or a negative thing.
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In the wells of livestock vans with shells and garden sands /
Iron mixed with oxygen as per the laws of chemistry and chance /
A shape was roughly human, it was only roughly human /
Apparition eyes / Apparition eyes / Knock, apparition, knock / Eyes, apparition eyes /

Yoink

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #98374 on: October 29, 2015, 10:22:54 pm »

I want to start drinking now, but my party's not 'til tomorrow...
Fuck it, there's plenty of beer. I need to test it after all, to ensure it is up to party standard.
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Bohandas

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #98375 on: October 29, 2015, 10:34:04 pm »

My dvd player's pn the fritz. How am I going to watch my horror movies now?
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Willfor

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #98376 on: October 29, 2015, 10:34:38 pm »

Does that actually make it right though? It started as an actual insult. It traces its origins to an insult. We're barely ten years removed from it being a completely ostracizing term. I'm not saying you're a terrible person for saying it, but maybe you should actually think about whether your using it is a good thing or not. Maybe you should think about how other people are going to read it, especially if they've been called it as an insult their whole life. Maybe you should think about whether a person is going to actually tell you whether they're gay or not based on how they perceive whether you view it as a positive or a negative thing.
I could analyse every facet of my life like that, though. I don't because overthinking things is the exact opposite of what to do most of the time when socialising, with the exception of trying to wheedle your way out of a pounding or trying to have a debate with someone.

Also because overthinking things makes me think I've done fucking EVERYTHING wrong. If I overthought this post I'd feel like I'd worded it incredibly poorly and I was going to be ostracised as a result.

I mean, you're allowed to go through life like that just fine. Just be advised that you can't tell anyone not to be offended by it. You have to actually own that. As long as you're fine with that, you're good.
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In the wells of livestock vans with shells and garden sands /
Iron mixed with oxygen as per the laws of chemistry and chance /
A shape was roughly human, it was only roughly human /
Apparition eyes / Apparition eyes / Knock, apparition, knock / Eyes, apparition eyes /

MetalSlimeHunt

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #98377 on: October 29, 2015, 11:14:01 pm »

Shaved off my nascent beardling attempt after only a week. I have the genes and the coverage for a decent beard (and what is either some strange-looking grey or otherwise unrepresented blonde hair in my gotee area), but I can't stand the itchiness. It's driving me to madness.

On the bright side, my face is now euphorically smooth and free of chronic razor burn, as well as having already recorded several instances of people treating me better when I have facial hair.
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Arx

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #98378 on: October 29, 2015, 11:47:06 pm »

Update 2: Mother in law and I have largely made peace. I was being an incorrigible ass and apologized for it. Wolfeyez is still in the hospital getting her infection under control. Many of the hospital staff have started calling her Superwoman. She should be home tomorrow.

Glad to here you're managing with the step-s. Also good to hear Wolfeyez is doing well.
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IcyTea31

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #98379 on: October 29, 2015, 11:54:42 pm »

The only two people I know who ever use 'gay' or 'faggot' as negative words are both quite flamboyant, and one of them is out of the closet. The other is more of a 'Real Men Wear Pink' kind of straight person.

Does this change the situation in any way? Is there a 'situation' in the first place? Does the "N-word privilege" apply to homosexuals as well?
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Bauglir

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #98380 on: October 30, 2015, 12:13:46 am »

Does the "N-word privilege" apply to homosexuals as well?
Absolutely! The privilege has always been about the degree to which offense could reasonably be taken from your use of the word, not the particulars of the word. Cultural norms make it fairly reasonable to infer that using "faggot" indicates disregard for or outright antipathy toward gay folks, just as using "nigger" indicates the same for black ones. Context, of course, is everything, and one of the strongest contextual signals you can pick up on is the identity of the speaker - it's a lot less immediately clear that a member of the group in question would feel that way toward themselves. Of course, there are other cues that can indicate the same lack of negligence or malice. I hope this conversation is one of them, or else I'll feel mighty guilty for using the words myself just now!

Now, you might be thinking, "You say 'negligence' like it's just as bad, but I can't possibly be aware of every possible reason every possible listener could have for taking offense!" And that's certainly true, you can't - and shouldn't be expected to. This is where apologies come in - if you use the word in a context where somebody does take offense, then you fucked up. It doesn't mean you're a terrible person, but it does generally merit an apology, in the same way as if you bumped into somebody on the sidewalk. Apologize sincerely, move on, and let the other person handle it how they will. If they refuse the apology, that's their business, but they shouldn't be surprised if you don't see a need to do much more than that. And, of course, if someone takes offense on behalf of somebody who's not even present, they may or may not be acting a bit silly, so use your judgment as to whether or not an apology is merited or whether they're just being a dick. Social cues should be considered here, too - it may be that you feel you're morally in the wrong, but you might lose social face for sticking up for yourself, so it's worth considering whether that's a price you're willing to pay.

Finally, bear in mind that learning is a thing. If you repeatedly make the same mistake, it might be worth altering your long-term behavior instead of just watching your tongue for the rest of the conversation. So, while you shouldn't be expected to realize that "faggot" is a word you should use carefully right off the bat, if people keep objecting you should probably realize that your social circles don't like you using it, and adjust your behavior accordingly, just as you might do to avoid swearing at church, or whatever analogy floats your goat.
« Last Edit: October 30, 2015, 12:20:24 am by Bauglir »
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“What are you doing?”, asked Minsky. “I am training a randomly wired neural net to play Tic-Tac-Toe” Sussman replied. “Why is the net wired randomly?”, asked Minsky. “I do not want it to have any preconceptions of how to play”, Sussman said.
Minsky then shut his eyes. “Why do you close your eyes?”, Sussman asked his teacher.
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Yoink

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #98381 on: October 30, 2015, 12:19:09 am »

I have bit my metaphorical tongue so many times in this current discussion that I am left with just a proverbial bloody stump. :P
(Just pretend the emoticon's tongue is bitten off and it has blood oozing down its face. That would be kinda cool as a Halloween emoticon, too.)
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Bauglir

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #98382 on: October 30, 2015, 12:21:56 am »

if you squint it looks like it's vomiting blood

which is kind of like what would happen if you bit your tongue off

and then vomited
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In the days when Sussman was a novice, Minsky once came to him as he sat hacking at the PDP-6.
“What are you doing?”, asked Minsky. “I am training a randomly wired neural net to play Tic-Tac-Toe” Sussman replied. “Why is the net wired randomly?”, asked Minsky. “I do not want it to have any preconceptions of how to play”, Sussman said.
Minsky then shut his eyes. “Why do you close your eyes?”, Sussman asked his teacher.
“So that the room will be empty.”
At that moment, Sussman was enlightened.

ggamer

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #98383 on: October 30, 2015, 01:02:18 am »

really tired from a long day at work, meant to come home and finish an outline for my paper but instead I sat in my shower for 30 minutes and read the salvation war for another hour

then I got on the wtf thread and my brain really really wanted to write a whole dissertation about covenant theory and theology, as they say, getting scholastic up in this bitch

instead all i did was make a lame shining joke and cop out

time for bed i think

Orange Wizard

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #98384 on: October 30, 2015, 04:05:25 am »

It's really hard to clean blood out of wool carpet, apparently.
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