Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

[IcyTea31]

The most stressful day I've had ever, with so many important things to remember and not 10 minutes of rest inbetween. I ended up forgetting something which might have serious consequences. I'm trying to salvage the situation as best I can, but tiredness and depression are making this seem hopeless, and even if I do this perfectly, it might not be enough.

I just want to curl up and cry myself to sleep, but I need to get this done.

[itisnotlogical]

I want to shoot myself, but I'm so tired and apathetic that I don't even feel like taking that step. True story.

[Arx]

I want to shoot myself, but I'm so tired and apathetic that I don't even feel like taking that step. True story.

Don't do that. D:

At least sleep on it. And maybe have a nice meal and a shower. Or go for a walk or bike ride to clear your head, that often works for me. Just cycle off in one direction until I feel less like hurting myself and more like going to sleep.

[Jopax]

Indeedy, I can tell you that it is not a pleasant feeling to have a gun on your head. Plus it leaves a great big mess, so think of the poor people that would have to scrape bits of you off the walls.

Just kinda power trough this, you know it'll pass, sooner or later, and until it does you have us to tell you not to do it. So don't listen to the voices in your head, listen to the voices on B12, we may not be saner but I think we'd really hate to lose you.

Edit: Oh yeah, some sad stuff from me.
Well, trough a series of situations regarding the group I'm helping to admin on FB I now have to work with her on making YT tutorials. This is the exact opposite of what I needed and wanted, which was to stay away from her because I can't really handle being near her or thinking about her all that well, she understood that and gave me the space I needed. And I was doing almost fine, especially the past week, like,  I was actually being ok for the most part, something that's been quite rare in the past several months. But now, because nobody else was willing to take this job (understandably because it's easily one of the toughest assignments in the group) and I'm incapable of saying no to people I'm stuck doing this for the forseeable future. And I can feel the shitty ideas and emotions tugging at me already and I know it's only a matter of time before they catch me off guard and too tired to fight them off and the fucking downward spiral starts again :V
Unrelated to that, it's been what, three weeks now? Yeah, about three weeks of rain with maybe three or four days without. It was ok at first but it's getting fucking old by this point, especially since the only pair of waterproof shoes I have is actually only half waterproof because the right shoe absorbs water like a sponge. Also my fucking umbrella broke after two fucking uses, the fucking piece of low quality shit. And my student food card isn't working because the lazy asshats at the uni haven't actually booked us all in yet and we've had three weeks of classes already. That means I can't eat at the cafeteria for cheap but instead have to buy my own food, which wouldn't be that bad but I'm kinda short on money so I can't really go crazy there.
What else, I'm sure there's more but I just don't want to dig any of it up, starting to get pissed off and this has been ranty enough it seems, so I'll just quit while I'm kinda ahead.

Edit.2:
Aaand now one of the other admins just quit. I have a hunch as to why he quit but I really don't want it to be that because I really want him to be a better guy than that, I really really do. Welp, guess we're just gonna have to pick up the slack on that front too :I

EditV3:
It's 2 AM and I should really go to sleep but I'm kinda afraid to leave myself with that amount of time to do nothing but think, because that will end badly for my current state of mind, god damn it.

[Truean]

http://news.yahoo.com/house-gop-faces-leadership-disarray-returns-capitol-091824594--politics.html

Yes that's right, the speaker resigned, the runner up said he doesn't want the position, and Paul Ryan also doesn't want the position. Does anyone? Who's crazy enough to jump into the electric chair to face a certain shocking end?

What the GOP republicans promised is flatly impossible. They. Can. Not. Deliver. Period. Eternal tax cuts, spending cuts, and magical policies to fix all.... Whoever is stupid enough to head this sinking ship will inevitably take the blame. Full disclosure, I don't like John Boehner, not one bit, and I actually feel sorry for him. When I say he got thrown under the bus, then you know it's true.

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, step right aboard the titanic, now auditioning for captain....

[Bohandas]

If we're VERY VERY lucky though, maybe the Republican party will completely collapse.

[Bohandas]

Anyway, what's making me sad today is that none of the people I invited RSVPed to my invitation to come over and watch the Back to the Future trilogy at my house on wednesday (which is the date they went to in Back to the Future 2). Nobody's responded definitively either way, so I don't know what to do; I guess I'll have to make so e phone calls tomorrow. If anybody does come that exacerbates my second problem, which is that my DVD copy pf Back to the Future 2 has mysteriously disappeared, leaving me (unless I find it in the next tao days) with just the VHS copy I recorded off of TV back in the 1990's

[Spehss _]

It's 12:30 in the morning and I'm wasting time I should be spending sleeping or studying for a college test this Wednesday.

Wheeeeee, throw that life away, me.

[Rose]

leaving me (unless I find it in the next tao days) with just the VHS copy I recorded off of TV back in the 1990's

This is the opposite of a problem.

[miauw62]

I have a pimple right on top of the bulge of one of my vertebrae, and it hurts.

[Orange Wizard]

Wheeeeee, throw that life away, me.

Nonsense. I've wasted four years on failed academic pursuits and I'm still alive. There's no need to succeed the first time around.

[Rose]

Our Ox only has maybe a few weeks left to live.

[Xantalos]

Okay, this needs to change. I can't be waking up and spending 80 percent of my day totally despondent like I have been for the past ... shit, it's been almost 11 months now. Not my depression, which I can't really do crap about bar getting counseling, which has been slow going. I've got it mostly under control by now anyway, bar that ... that one fucking factor. The one thing - well, person - not causing me to feel so shitty, that's on me to blame, but she's my trigger for it that I've unwillingly made.

Now I just gotta get over my own cowardice...suppose this shouldn't take more than 3 or 4 months before the emotions become more painful than my worst predictions about the fallout.

Damn feelings.

[JoshuaFH]

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Anyone familiar with SMBC has probably read this comic before, and it got me thinking, why DO people so badly fear extremely unlikely accidents? Well, I thought about it, and I'm thinking it's the same reason that people gamble: A deep-seated need that the 'world' (or higher power, fate, luck, whatever) has deemed them special, and are thus confirming the value of their existence.

With being fearful of unlikely things, it's the same principle, but in the opposite direction: The deep-seated fear that the 'world' will instead confirm how horribly unlucky they are, and that all doubts of their self-worth will be rendered true. If something unfortunate only has a 1 in 10 chance of happening, and another unfortunate thing has a 1 in 1,000,000 chance of happening, then the far more improbable one is feared more because while it's far less likely to happen, it's many times more damaging to your self-worth.

Please don't ask why I'm posting this into the sad thread.

[Xantalos]

Okay, this needs to change. I can't be waking up and spending 80 percent of my day totally despondent like I have been for the past ... shit, it's been almost 11 months now. Not my depression, which I can't really do crap about bar getting counseling, which has been slow going. I've got it mostly under control by now anyway, bar that ... that one fucking factor. The one thing - well, person - not causing me to feel so shitty, that's on me to blame, but she's my trigger for it that I've unwillingly made.

Now I just gotta get over my own cowardice...suppose this shouldn't take more than 3 or 4 months before the emotions become more painful than my worst predictions about the fallout.

Damn feelings.

Also I just re-re-re-realized (I've had this thought a few times before) that my unnecessary obsession with this person is what's probably contributed to my writing productivity taking such a drastic dip. I used to spend what free thoughts I had thinking about various creative scenarios, but nowadays I mostly search for material to distract myself from the near-constant thoughts of her.
Gotta fix.