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[Truean]

Somehow I basically got brainwashed to think that I was worthless through a process called gaslighting. Turns out my parents had been doing it my whole life which made me vulnerable to it. Upon hearing I passed the bar 1st try with flying colors my mom exclaimed, "Great, now you can finally get your head out of your ass," right in front of my dad..... Wow.

So I'm testifying against these corrupt bastards (again), who for the longest time were totally fucking me over like this in an effort to get away with some bad shit and also not pay me. It's pretty amazing when I look back and review it with the prosecutors. I'm still having some problems with the crap they did to me, but yeah, it's comforting to know the terrible feelings I have about myself aren't real. Completely unbelievable if I didn't live through it and there weren't court papers and newspapers reporting on them.

I'm finally really starting to see it for what it was and recover a bit. The sheer fucking scope of it is staggering. I still have problems with it but wow. In the end I didn't get indicted and the other bastards did. It really is amazing and so incredibly hard for me to believe: both what happened and that I'm actually worth something. When you get yelled at day in and day out, it's hard to see that the people yelling are making the mistakes.... Not you. It's doubly hard when those people are in positions of immense power above you. Slowly getting there, and hopefully not too late.

[IcyTea31]

It shouldn't come as a surprise that the fault is in the corrupt idiot yelling for no sensical reason beyond childish egoism. It really shouldn't, and I could rant for a good while on it. But good for you on realizing it, Truean. I hope you'll get similar good feels in the future, and focus on the bad stuff only to know how to avoid it.[/sincerity]

[Truean]

[nods] I appreciate it man, but you have to realize the power somebody like a freaking judge or another (senior) lawyer has over a relatively new lawyer.... yeah. It was not good. I've had this happen before to a less manipulative and more blatantly corrupt degree, but when either the Feds or the State Attorney General get in on it, shit is hitting all kinds of fans. It only gets that way if people are all at once, corrupt as hell, manipulative as hell, and GOOD at being both. Takes forever to stop them.

[MetalSlimeHunt]

When you're ready to give up because it's too hard and you feel like this is your absolute limit, the other fucker is feeling like giving up because they're at their absolute limit. Be the unbearably stubborn fucker you want to see in the world.

[Yoink]

I suddenly feel grumpier than usual, for some reason.
Everything is pissing me off. :-/

[Truean]

Thanks Metal. I think my problem was that I got incredibly scared around these powerful people who threatened to ruin me and did. You don't think about how powerful your own thoughts are or how those can be manipulated by terrible people around you if they are around you. If you become immersed in things, your mind can trick itself into thinking it's the truth, especially if those things come from authoritative people.

Sidenote: Where is the IRC thread anymore? I tried to log into that thing and it wasn't working or else nobody was there for the first time ever?

[Eric Blank]

Fucking net neutrality bill was approved. The internet doesn't need laws!

Its not that I really give a fuck what's in the bill, I just hate with a murderous passion the concept of regulating and lording over every single goddamn thing. There is literally nothing sacred in this world.

[WillowLuman]

Wasn't the bill to prevent ISPs from deciding what content their customers got to see?

[MetalSlimeHunt]

The net neutrality regulation takes us a step back from the brink of corp-gov hell internet and back towards the status quo. It's a good thing.

[alexandertnt]

Also it's a law for companies that provide the internet, not a law for "The Internet". AFAIK its supposed to reduce the amount of both corporate and government interference the end user experiences on their internet connection. Sounds like a good thing to me.

[Darvi]

Net neutrality by itself is a good thing. What other things might be hiding in that bill however, who knows.

[MetalSlimeHunt]

It's not a secret. Also, it isn't a bill. It's an internal FCC vote on how they will go about regulating internet distribution.

[Skyrunner]

Truean IRC is in my sig, too. Darkmyst @ #bay12lb.

[Rose]

Fucking net neutrality bill was approved. The internet doesn't need laws!

Its not that I really give a fuck what's in the bill, I just hate with a murderous passion the concept of regulating and lording over every single goddamn thing. There is literally nothing sacred in this world.

Found the libertarian.

[Cptn Kaladin Anrizlokum]

I guess I'm more immune to sleeping pills than I thought...
I took about 10 days worth of pills at once and didn't even get tired from them.