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Author Topic: Things that made you sad today thread.  (Read 9751551 times)

Cryxis, Prince of Doom

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #81570 on: September 17, 2014, 10:36:12 pm »

Once again inserting my opinion, take it or leave it to be picked up and recycled

If someone gets a sex change then any sexual partner that they have without telling them that they got a sex change, they would be lying to. Imagine if you will a man walks into [insert favorite social local in which you physically see a person] and sees a cute girl and he decides to ask her out, she feels the same and they go on a date. They get into an intimate relationship and want to get married, the girl tells the guy that she had a sex change and she was born a man.

I don't know about you but if I was that guy I would feel lied to and cheated
So in my opinion it doesn't just affect the person that gets the change but it also affects anyone they are intimate with


I must reiterate as not to sound like a jerk
To each his own
My opinion is no better than yours
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Descan

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #81571 on: September 17, 2014, 10:43:58 pm »

Cryxis - everyone's entitled to their opinion, of course. I worry a lot about whether people nowadays put as much thought into it as they should, and feel like there should be restrictions (a mandatory waiting period, psych evaluation, or something) purely because it is such a huge decision and you don't want anyone making it for the wrong reasons (I'm lookin at you Objective)
There are those, dude. Hell, in some ways they're rather too restrictive. :v
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Shinotsa

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #81572 on: September 17, 2014, 10:44:38 pm »

The problems I see are that:

1) It's very difficult to make sure that someone fully understands the implications of such procedures. People tend to give medicine far too much credit, expecting only the best outcomes, and then flip to the complete opposite side when things go wrong.

2) This is a matter of self and of psychology. The self consistently changes and the individual constantly grows throughout life, so making this decision in an inherently unstable time such as adolescence or young adulthood is a prospect that scares the hell out of me. I have known someone who had always felt he should be a female during his childhood, and I have since fallen out of touch with him and do not know how this developed. I would, however, not think twice that sexual reassignment would be a good option for him if his mindset prevailed into adolescence, because it is consistent. But I must completely disagree with Glowcat that wanting to be more feminine is a reason to undergo drastic medical intervention and physical modification through surgery or hormone treatment.

3) Objective is young. Very young. No reason to jump the gun yet.


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« Last Edit: September 17, 2014, 10:46:55 pm by Shinotsa »
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Dutchling

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #81573 on: September 17, 2014, 10:46:50 pm »

Are sex changes even that good/convincing (as far as sexual organs go, that is)?
I honestly have no idea.

Also, isn't being young and filled to the brim with hormones generally a good reason to start thinking about these kind of things?
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Shinotsa

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #81574 on: September 17, 2014, 10:48:50 pm »

Are sex changes even that good/convincing (as far as sexual organs go, that is)?
I honestly have no idea.

Also, isn't being young and filled to the brim with hormones generally a good reason to start thinking about these kind of things?

Sex changes can be very convincing, or they could not be. Really depends on the person. There are plenty of women who look masculine and vice versa, but the hormones are good at giving feminine features and the surgery... well, honestly I don't know how it looks and I'm not sure I want to google it right now.

Also - being young and full of hormones is a good time to start thinking about it, sure, but being young and stupid is (to me) a really bad time to act on it unless you are positive.
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ShoesandHats

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #81575 on: September 17, 2014, 10:49:41 pm »

Once again inserting my opinion, take it or leave it to be picked up and recycled

If someone gets a sex change then any sexual partner that they have without telling them that they got a sex change, they would be lying to. Imagine if you will a man walks into [insert favorite social local in which you physically see a person] and sees a cute girl and he decides to ask her out, she feels the same and they go on a date. They get into an intimate relationship and want to get married, the girl tells the guy that she had a sex change and she was born a man.

I don't know about you but if I was that guy I would feel lied to and cheated
So in my opinion it doesn't just affect the person that gets the change but it also affects anyone they are intimate with


I must reiterate as not to sound like a jerk
To each his own
My opinion is no better than yours

That's more a reflection on the person who gets the sex change, though, rather than on the concept of a sex change itself. If a post-op transgendered person doesn't tell their significant other about the fact that they weren't always a guy/gal, they're dishonest. That's it. Not all people who get sex changes are dishonest, nor are they transformed into dishonest people. Besides, wouldn't you feel a bit weird about telling someone something like that, especially if it affected the chances that you'd get to know someone better? You couldn't exactly fault someone for lying about that (initially, at least).

Sorry to seem vaguely confrontational, especially after your friend passed away.
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Glowcat

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #81576 on: September 17, 2014, 10:50:04 pm »

@Shinotsa

Or you could actually respect people having the right to bodily autonomy with regard something that only effects them, rather than trying to impose yourself as a gatekeeper to their decisions. You do not know better than a trans person as to whether they need treatment, period.
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Spehss _

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #81577 on: September 17, 2014, 10:53:42 pm »

Also, isn't being young and filled to the brim with hormones generally a good reason to start thinking about these kind of things?
Wait what. Being full of hormones...is a good time to think about things? Can those words even be used together in a sentence like that?

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Dutchling

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #81578 on: September 17, 2014, 10:54:25 pm »

Well, hormones have a nasty tendency of making your body get all gendery :P
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Glowcat

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #81579 on: September 17, 2014, 10:55:30 pm »

Well, hormones have a nasty tendency of making your body get all gendery :P

Which is usually when dysphoria hits hardest... as well as the long term damages caused by having the wrong hormones and not using blockers.
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Orange Wizard

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #81580 on: September 17, 2014, 10:57:14 pm »

"while you were typing 7 new replies have been posted"

...

I'm inclined to discourage, or at least temper the possibility of a sex change, with the reminded that teenagers are really bad at making informed, objective (pardon the pun) choices. Objective is sixteen IIRC, and honestly I don't think that's the best age to be making this kind of decision.
My personal opinion is leaning heavily towards the "no, don't do that" direction, but feel free to disregard that as you wish.
My advice to you is to wait, and make sure you understand all of the implications. Talk to people about it. Research the topic as much as possible. Make sure this is what you want to do before you do it.

Other than that, though, I'll leave it up to you to decide, and I will provide what small amount of support that I can.

Edit:
Or you could actually respect people having the right to bodily autonomy with regard something that only effects them, rather than trying to impose yourself as a gatekeeper to their decisions. You do not know better than a trans person as to whether they need treatment, period.
I most certainly am not imposing myself as gatekeeper, and I doubt Shinotsa is either. I'm saying that Objective is young and (from personal experience), young people make bad decisions with about the same frequency as good ones.
The point is not to arbitrate the outcome, but to remind him that this decision needs to be well-informed.
« Last Edit: September 17, 2014, 11:03:14 pm by InsanityIncarnate »
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Descan

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #81581 on: September 17, 2014, 10:59:29 pm »

Yeah, there are ways to delay puberty as the kid sorts it out, rather than say "Fuck it, you gotta wait until you grow a beard before deciding if you want tits."

It's not all or nothing, delaying puberty like that isn't *terrible*.
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Cryxis, Prince of Doom

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #81582 on: September 17, 2014, 11:02:05 pm »

To those who fomented on what I left out
Did you want me to write a 20 page book on my opinion

I was just putting out one scenario that doesn't settle well with me and letting everyone know that I do not support sex changes


@Objective- do whatever you want to, but please take into consideration how your choices will not only affect you but also those around you and those you care for
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Vector

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #81583 on: September 17, 2014, 11:03:45 pm »

.
« Last Edit: August 14, 2017, 10:16:18 pm by Vector »
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Shinotsa

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #81584 on: September 17, 2014, 11:04:54 pm »

@Shinotsa

Or you could actually respect people having the right to bodily autonomy with regard something that only effects them, rather than trying to impose yourself as a gatekeeper to their decisions. You do not know better than a trans person as to whether they need treatment, period.

Jeez, harsh without touching on any of my points. We aren't talking about trans people, we're talking about people who don't know whether or not they're trans, like Objective here. I'm saying it's important to make sure they know the risks and that they shouldn't be doing it without being sure, since going under the knife is a dangerous prospect, and even hormones are dangerous when you look into increased cancer risks and other problems from them.
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