I've been stressed lately. I'm your typical lazy ass who doesn't think to clean more than the regular keep things tidy, make bed, clean dishes, take out the trash kind of way. I recently graduated from college with the highest marks in my class. I know office administration like it was the back of my hand, I command knowledge that many office workers would have to look up in reference manuals. I've been out there looking for work for weeks.
Not one response.
Could it be my cover letter and resume? I have had it proofed by multiple hiring authorities and they all comment on how professional and amazing it looks so that's not the problem. There are ads for these jobs I want so its not like the market is dry.
My wife who was used to doing all the extra things around the house that makes it truly clean now works and hasn't the time nor the energy to do them. And she shouldn't, it's my moral responsibility as the person with more free time to take care of the house. Especially since she still does the cooking. I just don't think of, know how to do all these things and it's making her upset and stressed. I don't want to do that to her.
Why haven't I gotten any responses? It's not the way I dress, I have really nice shoes, an expensive tailored jacket and dress pants. I always make sure my hair looks professional when I'm out handing out resumes. I smile, I look people in the eyes when I give them a nice firm but not overpowering handshake. I try to make thing "more than a couple sentences" when talking with the people I meet.
Every day that goes by I feel like a free loader. I want to work damn it! I don't want some crappy call center job again, or be stuck in the back of some fast food joint. I want a job I can feel proud of, a job with a future, a job where when someone looks at me, they don't see some akward kid wearing a stupid shirt.
But when I stop to think about it, I'm not being truthful to you all, or myself. of the 100% pie that is the administration field, I only have a chance at 5% of it. because I am a damn, dirty ape man.
I hate this so much, every-time it comes up I just want to scream. The self-image issues, the lack of any access to psychological help in this hick city. The only endocrinologist in the city who "Doesn't take my kind". The clothes I hate but have to wear, the social expectations I have been saddled with because of my birth.
I don't care if being born this way might have been the reason I'm "so smart". I don't care that dealing with this crap for so long has toughened me up and made me more resilient. I just want what everyone else has, I just want to have shallow, frivolous problems.
I just want a job in the field I'm good at, so I can afford a car and go somewhere where I can get help. Everyday I'm a little older, a little uglier and a little more sad.
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Topic: Things that made you sad today thread. (Read 9792396 times)