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[Lord Shonus]

It's okay. Seriously, it is. While I may not agree with everything you think, Vector, you're a pretty cool person and you should keep on being pretty cool.

As for sad.... well, my political orientation is a pretty big thing for my parents - they're highly conservative, which is fine. But I'm not sure if I agree with a lot of how they think, how they define things, and such stuff in general. I've talked with my dad some about it, and he seems to be trying to steer me onto what he thinks is the right path - he wants the best for his son, after all - but.... I just honestly don't know. I was hoping all this crap about what I think, what I want, what I need could wait until after I had a steady job and someplace to live, but circumstances seem to be forcing the issue. I'm being asked to define things I had always thought of as shades of grey, and I don't like it.

Try bonding over some aspect of politics that you mostly agree on to give yourselves some common ground. Usually this kind of rift between generations is seen more as a "he's rejecting everything I taught him" than simple disagreement.

[SirAaronIII]

A guy confronted me over something I posted on teh interwebz. Turns out he thought I was another person with the same name, and thought what I was saying (running a 6:56 mile YEAH!!! I'M SO PRO ALL OF A SUDDEN) was a lie since the other guy with my name is pretty slow. Troubles like this happen all the time with that guy. I mean seriously one time even the SCHOOL sent me something that was supposed to go to the other guy.

[xtank5]

I found out that I have to move into my hospital room on Monday.  No more overnight passes after then.

[Pnx]

I'm depressed. Half a dozen story settings rolling around in my head gathering fluff and I can't seem to do anything with any of them.



Ok, Vector, I've got to say this, you remind me of me.

You probably wouldn't see this but I recognize a lot of my traits in you in addition, including some of what I consider my worst traits, then there's the few extra issues you have on the side. You've gone through some of the same stuff I've gone through, and had some of the same struggles, and It's always hard to judge, but I'd say you also seem to have had it significantly worse than me.

Yet you managed to pull it all off and still be a kickass person. You looked your depression in the eye, kicked it in the crotch, and went off to do great things.

What I'm trying to say is that you're my role model. You're how I hope I could be in a couple of years, but realistically I know I could never pull that off.

Anyway, you gave me some hope at least. Thanks for that.

[Bauglir]

Guys, tell me it's okay to be an almost 22-year-old virginal math student who doesn't drink, can't drive, and whose favorite comic books were written for elementary school age kids.  I shouldn't find it disturbing when I discover that all of my high school friends seem to be moving on and finding love, alcohol, sex, makeup, cars, and drugs, but I guess somehow I'm still just a child at heart.

I don't understand what's happened to all of us.  It's only been a couple of years, and yet it seems that they're running after those things, as though everything else going on in their lives weren't enough to deal with and think about.

It's okay.

Maturity isn't about adopting some new particular set of activities, style of dress, or whatever. The only difference that matters between the trappings of adulthood and childhood is that the former are (for whatever reason) off limits to children. Defining your life by those limits as an adult is just as immature as defining your life by them as a child, whichever side of them you fall on. Ignoring the divide and allowing yourself to be who you are, because it is who you are, is a far more significant mark of maturity than your first glass of wine or the loss of your virginity. Even if who you are happens to be somebody who is mostly on one side of the aforementioned boundary, the point is that that boundary isn't what defines what you allow yourself to be.

[Jopax]

Yeah, growing up into a kid is pretty much my goal, responsibilities are all fine and dandy but you really shouldn't forget how to have fun (and kids have the most fun) which is why I get along with kids so great, we're on the same wavelenght so to speak ^^

And something which will be a pretty big downer for me for the next month.I can't go home before my birthday it seems (which is in a month (holy shit, I'm turning 19 in a month, holy shit o.o)) now my dad is visiting (along with my uncle who is going back to Germany) in some ten days, two of my best friends are also coming in the next two weeks (one isn't certain), this will help a bit but my roommates are slowly getting to me (especially on of them with feet so foul smelling you could easily weaponize them), especially their rather annoying and childish japes (I still have no idea why are they affecting me so much).The thing that I will miss the most in this one month tho is a certain girlfriend that was pretty much responsible for my mental well being troughout the last seven months or so, the one person I can tell pretty much anything.

So, no one to really talk to for a month, and with crap slowly pilling up I'm not really sure how I'm going to make it trough :/

[Aqizzar]

Yeah Vector, you've got a lot of friends here for a reason.  We're not all in the same boat, but we all know the same feeling.  I have the same doubts about myself, as a 24-year old college grad who's never owned his own place, can't remember important shit like bills and chores without being reminded of them, can't remember the last time he went on a date, and has more friends on his Steam list than he does in person.

You know what I think?  Fuck growing up.  I may not be happy with the way my life is going, but it's not because I'm not holding to some standard of people my age.  It's because it's not what I want.  What I expect to have at this point in my life thanks to cultural osmosis is irrelevant.  Buying videogames and Legos and icecream is not what's stopping me from getting a job that pays a living wage, so I'm not going to stop doing that.  And I'll keep doing that when I have that job.

[Duke 2.0]

Guys, tell me it's okay to be an almost 22-year-old virginal math student who doesn't drink, can't drive, and whose favorite comic books were written for elementary school age kids.

Hey, two years off. And I don't have anything I could possibly study except something as esoteric and finicky to get into as Art. And I'm sorta expected to get married before 25 or so. This is sorta making the biggest fear in my life dumping my loser ass onto some poor woman who will then have to deal with me.

You seem to have a ton of worries about fitting in with a changing crowd that are being repeated very frequently. Despite our constant affirmations on being yourself and not having to conform you seek some real disclosure on this issue that we cannot provide with such good intentions. I dunno if internet forms are a place to get such a message across without incredibly intimate details being used, and a close understanding of who you are that can only be known through interactions. Other than this text forum of course.

We are all here for you, but I think you need to voice some of these fears out loud to somebody. I know the current friend issues are sort of a barrier to expressing yourself in the first place, but having these things said out loud does wonders towards addressing them. Even if you need to say it to somebody online I guess.

[Vector]

You're right, of course.

It's just that I found out kind of accidentally that my old highschool friend is apparently, ah, out being sexually active with her boyfriend.  I'm tired of people looking at me so condescendingly and saying "Oh, that's Vector, she never changes."  It isn't true, of course.  I have changed.  I just haven't changed in the expected way.

I don't like being looked at that way, and what I really want to do is go create a life somewhere away from all these people and their expectations of who I should be, so they won't be looking down on me anymore, but I can instead arrive as a foreigner to their strange country.

I just kind of...

Well, even to myself, I live a kind of boring life.  It was necessary for a while because I couldn't push my limits too hard, but I don't want to do this anymore.

[ToonyMan]

I'm fine with this right now because I need to do everything still.

[Virex]

Guys, tell me it's okay to be an almost 22-year-old virginal math student who doesn't drink, can't drive, and whose favorite comic books were written for elementary school age kids.

To me that sounds like you're asking me to tell you it's OK to be a vertebrate or to be born in Mineapolis. The whole idea of worrying about that kind of boggles my mind to be honest, except the point about you not being able to drive, which may pose a problem. Luckily, that's something that can be fixed (unless you happen to only have 1 eye that has only 20% vision like a friend of mine. Then you're kind of fucked.)

[Trapezohedron]

Great. Fucking great.

I just woke up into the sound of my brothers getting into a heated argument about our debts to other people. My brother (2) told him that our debts was going to be payed for very soon. He (1) got angry and reminded us we still had other debts, one totalling 120,000.00pesos, aka knee deep in shit. I might've forgotten to tell you guys that he (1) was practically announcing it to the whole neighborhood, so, naturally, my other brother (2) told him to shut up. It fueled the argument even more, and then, next thing I know, they were shouting at each other, with brother (1) announcing more secrets to the whole fucking world.

Eventually, it all ended up with brother (1) showing us how much of an asshole he can get when it comes into favors, and brother (2) showing us that he's a jerk.

And everyone is in tears now.

Fuck it all.

[Bauglir]

Huh. I've not known you long enough to speak to any changes, and also the Internet makes it harder to do that anyway. The most significant would probably be the cutting of the hair, and I rank it so only because of the significance you seemed to ascribe to it. So, maybe this post should be taken with a grain of salt. Nevertheless, the person you are right now seems to me to be an awesome person, and it's actually surprising how many times I have thought, "Man I wish I could hang out with Vector. Curse you, spacetime, for having a space component!" in response to some post you have made. Part of the person you seem to be, though, is somebody who is determined to improve herself and to keep growing, and to do it in the ways that seem best to her and not simply because it's expected by somebody else. Whoever that somebody else might be, whether a particular person or the abstraction that is society.

So I guess what I'm saying is that a part of what makes you somebody I like is that you aren't set on being eternally that same person, but are intent on growing in ways I'm certainly incompetent to predict. So maybe you incorporate some aspect I'm not fond of or didn't anticipate. Very probably you already have and I'm just not cognizant of it at present. Hooray! You're a person, people do that. You're not the image of you I have in my head (incidentally, don't try to work out how that works in the context of a post where I explain part of the image of you I have in my head, it just leads to dain bramage), and that's wonderful. Nobody really is that image, actually, but I appreciate it when people accept that. A lot of this post actually applies to more than one person on this forum, but probably I shouldn't make a list of all the people I like. I can't see that ending well.

So the person you are? Spiffy. The person you're going to be? Fucked if I know, but I'm willing to put my money on Even Spiffier.

As for boring... well, I'm not sure how to deal with that. I've been realizing it about my own life more and more lately. I need to get back into some hobbies, or work on getting some irons in the fire. Good luck, though. Whatever new things you do adopt, even if they are standard "adult hobby" fare, I feel like there's a good chance you'll be adopting them because you want to, and not because you're supposed to. Which, I think, is the important thing in living. Because it's what I try to do and I'm nothing if not an arrogant jackass who thinks he has all the answers.

EDIT: @New Guy

That is rough. I... really am not sure how to deal with that. Family arguments always just got me to retreat into my room or something until they were done, which is obviously useless to you. Good luck, I suppose. *Internet hug?*

[KaelGotDwarves]

This local BART busker (from SF) that covered the most amazing Johnny Cash took his own life: http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=tX1znPfzhVI

via reddit: http://www.reddit.com/r/Music/comments/m79el/i_used_to_hear_this_punk_kid_sing_the_most/

[dragnar]

Guys, tell me it's okay to be an almost 22-year-old virginal math student who doesn't drink, can't drive, and whose favorite comic books were written for elementary school age kids.

Well, lets see.
1. 19 years old
2. math student dropout(double major proved a BIT much...)
3. Do and and will never drink
4. I REALLY need to get around to getting that driver's license...
5. Nothing will ever top calvin and hobbes. I need no other comics.

So. I'm going to go with "yes, it is okay".