I'm upset today because my mother told me not to live with lesbians, and then demanded, angrily, to know if I was gay.
There were two reasons for this.
a. All lesbians will sexually abuse me and ignore my consent like my "friend" did in middle school.
b. Lesbians will not bring boys home for me to consider dating.
Next she asked me why I wasn't turned against all gay guys and their assault on my femininity, because one of my gay friends, once, made an inappropriate request that I protect him (rather than just requesting backup) if someone came to screw with him as he browsed the gay porn section.
It was, in fact, the queer and trans folk who tended to treat me much better than the vast majority of straight people. Though I have absolutely no gaydar at all ("She has a short haircut and wears masculine clothing? Cool! He sings in a choir and lives in the queer co-op? Cool!"), those who have let me know about these things... well, they're usually not that stereotypical, and they're usually really nice.
She then went on to, in an aggressive, accusative way, ask me if I was turned against all heterosexual men and dating in general due to my boyfriend's (extensive) emotional abuse. I told her I was not interested in dating, and quite possibly not interested in marriage because I didn't think it was the life for me. She proceeded to engage in the usual apologia--how this is what happens in relationships, how relationships often end in breakups, how it's usually both people's fault for whatever happens. Whittling away at my reality into a world where it was my fault and I misinterpreted things.
Because she wants me to be married, even though I don't want to be married, and she wants babies, even though I don't want babies, and because she wants me to be feminine, even though I don't want to be feminine. I shouldn't try to build arm muscle, because I'll look too butch. I shouldn't sit "like that," with my legs a bit apart, because it's rude. I shouldn't talk "like that," with my voice a bit low, because it's too masculine. I should talk like a Japanese woman--soft, high-pitched, deferential. I should be unconcerned with being tough, assertive, or brave.
This was, of course, after a conversation about how women are the ones really respected throughout the world--not men--despite all the evidence I provided to the contrary. How the vast majority of black people and gay people experience no prejudice and are just complaining about something that doesn't exist.
I am far more upset than I am capable of expressing right now.
Wow, your mother needs to learn to show you more respect. I have been harrassed by my own mother among others due to never having a girlfriend. My mother doesn't do anything beyond ask if I'm homosexual every few months or are you going to have kid before I die. Some other relatives talk behind my back about it and try to get me to date random women. So I can kinda relate to your situation in that way. I suppose my advice would be to just ignore her BS, as hard as that may be. I've used it on my relatives when they bother me, it works a little. Hmph, I remember that this also got me taunted (homophobic taunts) throughout junior high school and high school. I'll just say that I didn't like junior high school and high school and leave it at that.
My father does the same thing except he doesn't suspect me, same hyper conservative bullshit though. Unfortunately my parents have really no or so few friends that they constructively have no friends, because they are the rudest people on earth and will yell at you that they are not yelling.... This is because they consider screaming like someone cut off one of their toes "yelling" and nothing else.... The neighbors can easily verify this....
Dad: In denial about being a racist:
Religiously listens to right wing talk radio. Turns every, single, solitary conversation to "politics" or rather him bitching about it, no matter how much you beg him not to. His response, "I'm just saying" (yes I know, shut up). This is his steam valve. He has a lot of steam... and will never run out.... 5 weeks ago he seriously, screamingly advocated the genocide of all Muslims.... *sigh* I pointed out to him that this was what he was saying and it took him a full 40 minutes to realize just what he had said and start to backpedal.... Things like this happen all the time.... He calls the President the N-word when we talk, but only if other people aren't around....
Mom: Honestly mentally disturbed:
My mother has undiagnosed bi polar disorder and god knows what else. (I've woken up to find something new about the kitchen before, namely that she had ripped up the linoleum and god damn grouted and tiled the whole thing in a night!). She has no sense of any social ability. She calls women fat and wonders why they won't talk to her "My, Amy, you look bloated, have you gained weight." She will say things that will put ideas in your head starting with "M" and ending in "urder" no matter who you are. Every single person I know has told me this *sigh*. She, of course, is incapable of fault and demands you apologize to her for your overreaction.
She's like an internet troll, except in real life, and she really means all of it. Sadly, she's in her own private hell on earth....
She actually told her boss (allegedly while drunk) to "fuck off" by name at his own wedding reception and got pissed/upset/pulled a "poor me" act when he merely transferred her (instead of, you know, fired her, which is what anyone else would get). My mother is the single most passive aggressive and openly aggressive thing in the universe and I'm pretty sure she enforces the laws of entropy. I tried to get along with her yesterday extra hard, and I literally gave her an ice cream cone, because, you know, ice cream.... How can you be mad at ice cream? Right? She was! She still was! God damn it, you're pissed at me for giving you ice cream? How?! WHY? She ate it too and liked it....
God damn it my own mother hates everyone and everything including herself me when I am giving her ice cream. The hell is that possible?!
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Topic: Things that made you sad today thread. (Read 9719116 times)