Time has a way of marching on and on... but don't get too caught up with where it's eventually going to be. Preemptive remorse and regret, though it might help you see the worth of things, is really silly to hold on to. Just work hard to appreciate the good things you have while you have them... even the people and places and things you don't notice in your daily life.
Nah, I'm not holding onto it. I was just thinking about my favorite professor's heart condition, and how he had to spend a year or two bedridden because of it. I really want everything to be okay for him, and for Aspen, and for Rosewood, and for Thyme, and all the people I interact with but never talk about here. I know I spew a lot of vitriol on these boards about how much I hate them. It's not really true, though... not in any deep, long-lasting sense. We may not be able to be friends, but I love them.
Sometimes it overcomes me, just by chance. I never stay very long in the tragedy of the people I adore dying, but it does sneak up, once in a while.
Thus, don't worry about whether being a good person is good, and just keep being one.
Thank you. That was... hm. It struck me, somehow.
P.S. If you posted that story here, I have a sneaking suspicion you'd find a few readers. :3
Hahahaha >_> Not until I change all the names and so on I'm writing into it. It's just an Outline of Hugenormosity. Most of it probably won't go in, in the end... at the moment, it's sort of a trawl through all the interesting moments of the past two years. An embarrassing trawl.
15-year-old Vector spends an afternoon crying on the floor because she is lonely. Develops a theory that this is because she is bad at mathematics. Secret: it’s because she never talks to anyone.
Father comes home. He says that if That Boy does anything to hurt his little girl, he’ll rip the bastard’s intestines out through his nose. A little exploration of the nuclear family dynamic.
One evening, she makes a long speech about the significance of the number five and asks if she can hold his hand.
First… engineering lab? That’s because she’s an engineering major. Mechanical engineering. Alrighty. Lab is full of assholes who make fun of her voice. She hates them and is the only person in her group who can figure out the equipment. Reminded of her youth as a “printer-whisperer.”
She walks by Professor Brie and says hello with violent enthusiasm. He blows her off. She is crushed. Very short scene.
In response, she builds a cathedral out of condiment bottles in the dining hall.