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[Il Palazzo]

You calm down by meticulously plotting and enacting your revenge! Take revenge on those who wronged you by living a happy and fulfilling life. That is sure to take them by surprise.
If you let Magmacube (huzzah!) 'asplode it'll become Lavacube (boo!), and everybody knows lava is much less awesome of the two flows, as evidenced by magma - not lava - being the memetic go-to on one of the most fantabulous forums on the internet.

[Magmacube_tr]

You calm down by meticulously plotting and enacting your revenge! Take revenge on those who wronged you by living a happy and fulfilling life. That is sure to take them by surprise.
If you let Magmacube (huzzah!) 'asplode it'll become Lavacube (boo!), and everybody knows lava is much less awesome of the two flows, as evidenced by magma - not lava - being the memetic go-to on one of the most fantabulous forums on the internet.

Pfft. Okay this actually made me laugh. Thanks. I mean it.

[hector13]

Eh, one of the things in CBT (not that one) is a little flow chart of thoughts and emotions and physical sensations and behaviors.

Fakedit: This thing:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

The idea being if you can change any of the things in the flow chart, you’ll have an effect on the others, though I’ll concede it’s easier said than done.

[Robot Parade Leader]

I am still absolutely fucking livid though...

Guess who is still absolutely fucking livid? ME!

I calm down for a day or two, then start ruminating again. It is like a volcano. I am definitely living up to my online name these days.

It is just so... have you ever been threatened like this? What did that made you feel? Is there a way to calm down or am I in a collision course to do some horrible, horrible shit that will definitely make the news around here?

http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=157225.0

That's kind of how I was taught to deal with it, or a good portion in addition to the therapy referral. Also "T" really helped me here. She just doesn't want quoted for safety reasons being trans, and I don't have any issues with trans anything, because of her. She helped me a lot and showed me lots of the crap I was raised to believe about them was wrong.

I still look back on a lot of the stuff she said.

http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=157225.msg6911319#msg6911319

http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=157225.msg6913092#msg6913092

http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=157225.msg6913620#msg6913620

Therapy from a licensed professional can really help. There's no point in getting mad or doing bad things because it just makes it worse.

[Maximum Spin]

Eh, one of the things in CBT (not that one) is a little flow chart of thoughts and emotions and physical sensations and behaviors.

Fakedit: This thing:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

The idea being if you can change any of the things in the flow chart, you’ll have an effect on the others, though I’ll concede it’s easier said than done.

I think this is incredibly important.

At the end of the day, the contents of your own mind are up to you. You decide what you let in or don't, what you spend your time and attention on or don't. It can be very hard to change your habits of thought, but they're yours and nobody and nothing else can force you to have something in your head that you don't want there.

Guess who is still absolutely fucking livid? ME!

I calm down for a day or two, then start ruminating again. It is like a volcano. I am definitely living up to my online name these days.

It is just so... have you ever been threatened like this? What did that made you feel? Is there a way to calm down or am I in a collision course to do some horrible, horrible shit that will definitely make the news around here?

For me, I find it easiest to intervene by stopping and reflecting on thoughts. Whenever you suddenly start ruminating again, as soon as you realize that's what you're doing - and strive to notice it as quickly as possible - what I would do is mentally address that, recognize what you're feeling, and tell yourself, out loud if you have to, that you're not going to let that stress you out right now. Then immediately shift your attention to something else. Of course you'll probably have to do this many times at first because the thoughts keep coming back, but by addressing them and choosing to shift away rather than trying to suppress them, you can minimize the effect you let them have on your mood.

[McTraveller]

I really have no standing for my emotions, but I'm really struggling with the fact that, for the first time in my adult life, I'm going to actually have less income next year than this year¹.  I'm still better off than 90% of the people in the world, but I'm still bothered.

I'm almost more sad that it bothers me than the fact that I'll have less income.

It suggests that I'm a control freak, suffer from avarice, and am selfish, on top of being self-righteous because I give <x%> of my income away to charities and have committed to keep that % regardless of the nominal value of my income.

Spoiler: 1 (click to show/hide)

Between having to change jobs and take a pay cut, projected 7% increase in health insurance premiums, looming 3 percentage points increase in income tax due to expiration of TCJA which will drop my take home by about 4%, and at least a 16% reduction in my interest income (4.2%/5.0% presently, but if they keep dropping interest rates the effect is larger; yay for nonlinear impacts of fixed-increment percentage-point decreases), there are a lot of top-line reductions in take home. This doesn't even include changes on the bottom-line related to other cost increases I cannot forecast.

[martinuzz]

Therapy helps if you live in a country that has benevolent therapy.
Magma is from Turkey. Don't seek a thereapist there for LGHBTI issues (such as your family promising to murder you) unless you really love being electroshocked and otherwised tortured to 'cure' you.

[Truean]

Please do not quote

I can relate and sympathize a lot.

Wish it were different. No solutions presently; only sympathy. Tried previously, met some success, but the average person is hurting.
Doing bad things ends badly. See below.

Glad it helped. Still stand by it. Gotten me through a lot. Tools, resources, and reflection to manage emotion are scarce; those lacking them are abundant and seemingly ever present. Ultimately, if it helps avoid bad choices, then good and a rarity online.

Sadly, helping fatigues me, as does the backlash. Disability doesn't help.

Please do not quote

[Great Order]

Today in "My goddamn hallmates"

Fridge space is limited, no shock, student accommodation is like that.

Someone took my milk out of the fridge to slot theirs in. No issue, shuffling about is sometimes necessary.

*They didn't put it back in the fridge*.

Lucky me, I decided I wanted a coffee so I went through there and found it before it got warm, but it had been hidden around the corner.

A warning has been issued about this, in the form of "If you need to move things around, fine. If you leave my stuff out of the fridge to go off in future, I will bin your shit in turn"

Genuine question, is this a girl thing? When I've been living with other people it's like boys are universally slightly dirty, mucky and messy, whereas girls there's a 50/50 chance they'll keep everything clean or they'll be completely unwilling to acknowledge anyone else lives with them and treat common areas and other people's belongings with complete disregard bordering on contempt.

[None]

So I fell off my longboard this saturday and landed square on my hip. Nasty (but only partial) closed hip fracture. First extended hospital visit of my life; I now have a metal rod and some screws in my leg, and entirely too many staples in my ass. I have insurance, thankfully. It shouldn't even have been a bad fall, but, well. On the bright side, I didn't need the socket replaced or anything.

Highlights:

Morphine kind of sucks.
Dilaudid sucks more because it's itchy.
Hospitals suck because it takes either an hour to get pain meds, or all night/never to get the external catheter contraption so you can pee in bed
Peeing in bed sucks because your brain doesn't understand why you'd ever want to do that
Hospital food barely qualifies as food- ham and cheese omelette is some scraping of ham atop two eggs that had american cheese throw in. I got watered down Sprite.

I'm tired and gross and itchy. And, y'know, in pain, but that'll be nothing new for the next 6-8 weeks.

[Eric Blank]

It sucks, yeah. My father was in the hospital last week too. Complained about everything.

Also i bet youre allergic to dilaudid. You probably know that by now, but hey if you dont...

[Grim Portent]

My gran's been in awful pain today, and there isn't much I can do for her, and the whole thing winds up being distressing and tiring for me as well as her because of how she reacts to pain with her dementia.

She's finally settled into a nap, and I am mentally exhausted.

If I ever get even the faintest glimmer of dementia or alzheimer's, I am walking into the sea.

[Frumple]

Eyup. Assuming I live long enough for it to be relevant, if there's not some kind of accessible cure by the time it starts hitting me, that'll be that. I'm not living through what my grandparents did, not of my own volition.

[wobbly]

Regarding the pain aspect I have a weird relationship with it that may be helpful, maybe not.  You can actually just turn it off except when you can't. Pain is weird, if you shift it out of your attention it know longer exists. Sometimes the pain is to much for that to work. When that doesn't work, you usually do the opposite. You turn it up till, like I',m not expecting the logic to actually... make the sense, but the technique, is to dive into it into it till... I mean Probably you're relative is already(not probably) and probably she deals with it some how (and maybe doesn't deal with it)

[wobbly]

Again I'm not expecting this to make sense, but at some point you actually hit a limit where the world is just filled with pain you can fill no more.