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Author Topic: Things that made you sad today thread.  (Read 9743203 times)

Retro

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #11820 on: September 09, 2010, 09:10:11 pm »

this is the worst headache, and its not my fault this time augh

please stop

nenjin

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #11821 on: September 09, 2010, 09:27:40 pm »

Well that was creepy. I think I just read the 100% other side of my last relationship via Vector's post.

And now I'm sad.

Smart guys are kind of assholes, even when they're nice guys. It's sad but true. I totally fell into the trap of diasgreeing with my last GF over stuff I really should have just kept my mouth shut on. But she never hesitated to let me know what she thought, so I thought the same held in kind. It really doesn't. But maybe that's because guys suck at criticizing women in a way they don't hate, and women are especially sensitive to criticism from their guy.

It was only after that relationship that I finally realized what married guys mean by a negotiated defeat. I know that sounds terrible, but in retrospect I would have rather left like I wasn't getting my fair say in things, than basically knowing every time I opened my gob on something important I made her feel like shit.
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Rilder

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #11822 on: September 09, 2010, 11:46:41 pm »

Meh.
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Mindmaker

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #11823 on: September 10, 2010, 02:15:43 am »

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Josephus

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #11824 on: September 10, 2010, 02:18:14 am »

Solution: date men.
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Solar Rangers: Suggestion Game in SPAAAAACE
RPG Interest Check Thread
i had the elves bring me two tigermen, although i forgot to let them out of the cage and they died : ( i was sad : (

Solifuge

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #11825 on: September 10, 2010, 03:11:14 am »

Not sure where I was going with this ramble, but it's good to just air it out.

Well that was creepy. I think I just read the 100% other side of my last relationship via Vector's post.

And now I'm sad.

I like to think I'm a genuinely good person; trying to leave the things I encounter better than I found them, whether that's through cleaning up a sidewalk with some litter on it, or helping a frazzled-looking stranger at a bus stop get their thoughts in order. At the same time, I tend to look for negative qualities I see in other people within myself, so I can be more aware of times when I might be doing something like them.

In hearing about this guy, and other people in the same vein, I can't help but be reminded of the times I've let anger get the best of me, and used what Empathy or Charisma or whatever the crap it is I have to really, really hurt people. I tend to feel ill about it after emotions have cooled, and the guilt trails after me... but I'm no stranger to it. I don't think I've gone out of my way to instigate any of it, but I don't think that doing it in retaliation alone makes it much better. I still haven't shaken the guilt from a lot of things, and it tends to resurface whenever I recall a related memory. I guess I have a lot of trouble letting go of guilt. I can consciously understand that it's all self-imposed... but I can't seem to shake the realization of the hurt I've caused, the embarrassment I felt, or any of that.

Going off on an illustrative tangent... I've been rather depressed, and despite putting on my best social masks, I haven't been returning most of my calls lately. It's a bad habit of mine, when I want to withdraw from people and things. I remind others that my phone doesn't always work in the apartment, so they don't feel like I'm ignoring them (even if I essentially am), because I don't want to hurt them or make them think I don't want to speak with them. In fact, I missed out on visiting with my grandparents on my Mom's side for a Labor Day Picnic they were having, and not because I didn't want to see them, but because I just felt too guilty about not having wanted to answer the phone and confirm.

Anyway, this afternoon I spent time with my grandparents on the other side of my family, for their 59th Wedding Anniversary (It took a lot of calls from my dad, and eventually a text message with directions and so on to help me motivate myself to do it). As a surprise, however, my other grandparents dropped by on their way to spend time at the old Family Farm in the Upper Peninsula. They seemed genuinely surprised that I was there, and though they were outwardly happy to see me, I could see, particularly in my grandma's eyes, that they were heartbroken. They'd thought I hadn't wanted to see them, and I swear I almost saw tears.

They're getting old, both in their 80's, and they're not in the best of health. For most of my childhood, they were there for me more than my own mother or father were, and I do mean that. I love them a great deal, and have tremendous respect for their kindness, tenacity, sensibility, and the full life they continue to enjoy long into their 80s. Everything in me wanted to explain to them what had happened... about the depression (they really don't know about that) about the phone, everything... but all I could do was just stutter, and see the deeply hurt look in her eyes, as she smiled and told me how happy they were to see me.

God, I feel like a wretched person sometimes.
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ILikePie

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #11826 on: September 10, 2010, 03:29:52 am »

Spoiler: snip (click to show/hide)
Picking up the phone, or even driving over to apologize can be very hard, but people don't enjoy holding their grudges. They will usually let them go as soon as they can, or even forget whatever happened happened. If your grandparents are who they sound like, they've probably forgotten and forgive you already, and if they haven't, I'm sure they're just eagerly waiting to speak with you again.
I too have times when I don't pick up the phone, I /hate/ phones.

Solution: date men.
That ain't as easy at sounds for some of us...

Anyway, it's "Rosh Hashana" here, that's the Jewish New Year. It's a two day holiday involving two big family dinners and lots of food. Usually I'd enjoy these gatherings, but not when those chaps shove boatloads of honey into their foods. I'd don't know about you guys, but sweet chicken, beef, and salad just aren't my cup of tea.
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Tack

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #11827 on: September 10, 2010, 03:47:38 am »

Solution: date men.
So you can both cry over eachother both being assholes to eachother? Great.

Solution- Don't be an asshole?

Hey, It's a long learning process, you might get it or you might not.
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Yeah, he's a banned spammer. Normally we'd delete this thread too, but people were having too much fun with it by the time we got here.

Josephus

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #11828 on: September 10, 2010, 03:48:56 am »

Solution: date men.
So you can both cry over eachother both being assholes to eachother? Great.

Solution- Don't be an asshole?

Yes. That is the other, better solution.
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Solar Rangers: Suggestion Game in SPAAAAACE
RPG Interest Check Thread
i had the elves bring me two tigermen, although i forgot to let them out of the cage and they died : ( i was sad : (

ChairmanPoo

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #11829 on: September 10, 2010, 04:32:29 am »

Solution: find a girl whom you like and isn't psychotically sensitive
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smigenboger

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #11830 on: September 10, 2010, 04:33:58 am »

Solution: find a girl whom you like and isn't psychotically sensitive
...That can deal with you.
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ChairmanPoo

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #11831 on: September 10, 2010, 05:08:55 am »

obviously you're not going to get anything going with someone who *doesn't* like you.

Then again, if you're going exclusively for the "anyone who can deal with me" angle, are you really surprised that you end up with less than sane people? At that point you might want to consider whether being alone would be better than being in lousy company. I don't mean swearing some kind of chastity vow. Rather, I mean not getting into serious relationships (as in, anything beyond an one night stand) with anyone who doesn't have any other virtues than being willing to suffer you.
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Everyone sucks at everything. Until they don't. Not sucking is a product of time invested.

Snall

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #11832 on: September 10, 2010, 05:19:00 am »

Humanity.  Internet AOL types. 
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Schilcote

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #11833 on: September 10, 2010, 05:38:58 am »

Humanity.  Internet AOL types.

Yeah, humans are teh fail. JOIN IN THE GLORY OF THE MACHINE MOTHER

Anyway, it looks like I'm going to be going another day without any food. Ugh, it messes up my brain quite nastily if I don't get any food for about 8 hours...
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Mindmaker

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #11834 on: September 10, 2010, 05:41:28 am »

Humanity.  Internet AOL types.

Yeah, humans are teh fail. JOIN IN THE GLORY OF THE MACHINE MOTHER

Anyway, it looks like I'm going to be going another day without any food. Ugh, it messes up my brain quite nastily if I don't get any food for about 8 hours...

So why are you letting yourself starve?
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