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[Kagus]

Experts are experts, and people would be better off if they could simply remember that.

That said, most experts are also people, and people are immensely capable of being stupid. This primarily comes around in the form of experts giving official opinions on things outside their zone of expertise, but they're entirely capable of making incredibly dumb statements and decisions within that zone.

Again, it's a matter of critical thinking. By all means, listen to the experts... but also be aware that they can at times be just as humanly fallible as any other human.


Also, hi Tiruin! I never got around to responding in the Freeman thread, but I didn't want you to think that I was ignoring you.

[Trekkin]

Experts are experts, and people would be better off if they could simply remember that.

That said, most experts are also people, and people are immensely capable of being stupid. This primarily comes around in the form of experts giving official opinions on things outside their zone of expertise, but they're entirely capable of making incredibly dumb statements and decisions within that zone.

Again, it's a matter of critical thinking. By all means, listen to the experts... but also be aware that they can at times be just as humanly fallible as any other human.

Unfortunately, people are far more aware of that when they don't want to listen to the experts, all the more so because we teach critical thinking chiefly as a list of reasons to justify not believing something without indicating when to stop prattling about bias or hunting for trivial confounding variables and just accept information as probably true to the limits of a layperson's ability to judge.

[Kagus]

Hence why we should always try to use some of that critical thinking on ourselves and our own motives for doing something, hehe.

Trust me, I roll crit builds in RPGs all the time. I know a thing or two about thinking with criticals.

[Dunamisdeos]

Had to take my 2-year old to an EEG test, and he was terrified the whole time and it was very sad. He eventually was ok and went to sleep after like 30m.

[LordBaal]

Oh lord, whenever my son is up to a blood test or anything I feel like dying. A EEG test can be terrifying to a grown up, never mind a little kid. I hope you kid is fine!

[misko27]

Experts are experts, and people would be better off if they could simply remember that.

That said, most experts are also people, and people are immensely capable of being stupid. This primarily comes around in the form of experts giving official opinions on things outside their zone of expertise, but they're entirely capable of making incredibly dumb statements and decisions within that zone.

Again, it's a matter of critical thinking. By all means, listen to the experts... but also be aware that they can at times be just as humanly fallible as any other human.


Also, hi Tiruin! I never got around to responding in the Freeman thread, but I didn't want you to think that I was ignoring you.

Ahh, but "Expert" is entirely context dependent in my view. Outside of your field of expertise, you cease to be an expert at all; and if one thinks they are, they are guilty of precisely the ignorance that my post is directed at.

I'm not suggesting that the uninformed are not allowed opinions; how could we even live, or get better at anything, or learn? But simply that we remember that they are uninformed.

[Trekkin]

Ahh, but "Expert" is entirely context dependent in my view. Outside of your field of expertise, you cease to be an expert at all; and if one thinks they are, they are guilty of precisely the ignorance that my post is directed at.

I'm not suggesting that the uninformed are not allowed opinions; how could we even live, or get better at anything, or learn? But simply that we remember that they are uninformed.

And, hopefully, that we remember that lay determinations of the scope of an expert's field of expertise are also uninformed. Sometimes that's enough to spot someone talking wildly outside their competence  (Linus Pauling talking about the health benefits of vitamin C megadosage, for example), but sometimes it is not, and in my experience people tend to underestimate how much general knowledge most experts actually acquire -- understandably so, since the popular press tends to elide all the messy interdisciplinary bits, but still. Judging people rather than claims is often uninformative anyway, however well it may lend itself to snark, and it vastly exacerbates people's tendency to jump straight to explaining how they're smarter than everyone who disagrees with them.

[Dunamisdeos]

Oh lord, whenever my son is up to a blood test or anything I feel like dying. A EEG test can be terrifying to a grown up, never mind a little kid. I hope you kid is fine!

I think so, they've ruled out anything reasonably serious and as soon as we left the room he was trying to make friends with everyone that walked by in the hospital halls, so I guess he's not psychologically scarred or anything, but still.

Thanks :3

[Magistrum]

Have you tried becoming obsessed with your own mortality?

[JoshuaFH]

My apartment is littered with garbage, my laundry has been left untouched for months, same for my sink and dishes, I have no special hobbies (or atleast anything that's genuinely worth caring about), I'm not going to school, I only have a part time job that is honestly dull as fuck, I'm an idiot with an illusion of grandeur, I'm physically weak and unremarkable, I'm a coward, I'm a virgin that's never been in anything resembling a real relationship before and I doubt I ever will. I honestly just want to check out of life because you know what? Everything takes too much fucking effort, and I just can't be bothered to put in the necessary effort and energy to even get to 'normal', and even if I achieved anything, I don't know if I'd even enjoy it.

That's pretty much it, everything just takes too much effort. Even things which I devote all my mental and emotional energies towards, I can barely even achieve a half-success. To even get to where I don't look like a worthless slob, I feel like I'd have to do more than devote every waking second of my day, I'd have to dectuple my current energy and effort just to get to the 'neutral' that everyone else lives with normally. I feel like the only thing that gets me through the day, the only thing that makes me look like a real member of society is my innate sense of pretentiousness, that is, I'm a fake. And I don't even feel like if I did have all that energy and effort, it still wouldn't make me happy or amount to anything, cause to be more than 'normal' I'd need even more energy than that, so more than ten times, I'd need a hundred times my current energy or more just to get to 'happiness' or 'success'...

I feel like in order to escape from this way of life would take an enormous, life-changing event in order to catalyze the necessary energy to change my perspective, to make the quantum jump from this pointless existence, but that feels too much of a romanticization itself, that expecting something like that to happen is honestly asking too much, and it will probably never happen. I'm asking for a miracle, when really I should be just disciplined and doing it myself, but I'm always asking myself "What's the point?". The only time I really get off my ass and do anything is if a problem gets big and problematic enough to interfere with my comfortable and idiotic lifestyle.

I complain now, but I'm heading to work in a few minutes, and when I get off my shift tomorrow I'll head to the gym, perform my pointless exercises, and still go home fat and weak, too drained of energy to really do anything else, but vaguely hoping that that energy I expended will someday pay off in a real way, without any idea as to 'how'. I had a couple days off to actually do the dishes and do the laundry, but I just couldn't be bothered. I don't even know why I'm writing about this. I'm sorry.

[LordBaal]

My apartment is littered with garbage, my laundry has been left untouched for months, same for my sink and dishes, I have no special hobbies (or atleast anything that's genuinely worth caring about), I'm not going to school, I only have a part time job that is honestly dull as fuck, I'm an idiot with an illusion of grandeur, I'm physically weak and unremarkable, I'm a coward, I'm a virgin that's never been in anything resembling a real relationship before and I doubt I ever will. I honestly just want to check out of life because you know what? Everything takes too much fucking effort, and I just can't be bothered to put in the necessary effort and energy to even get to 'normal', and even if I achieved anything, I don't know if I'd even enjoy it.

That's pretty much it, everything just takes too much effort. Even things which I devote all my mental and emotional energies towards, I can barely even achieve a half-success. To even get to where I don't look like a worthless slob, I feel like I'd have to do more than devote every waking second of my day, I'd have to dectuple my current energy and effort just to get to the 'neutral' that everyone else lives with normally. I feel like the only thing that gets me through the day, the only thing that makes me look like a real member of society is my innate sense of pretentiousness, that is, I'm a fake. And I don't even feel like if I did have all that energy and effort, it still wouldn't make me happy or amount to anything, cause to be more than 'normal' I'd need even more energy than that, so more than ten times, I'd need a hundred times my current energy or more just to get to 'happiness' or 'success'...

I feel like in order to escape from this way of life would take an enormous, life-changing event in order to catalyze the necessary energy to change my perspective, to make the quantum jump from this pointless existence, but that feels too much of a romanticization itself, that expecting something like that to happen is honestly asking too much, and it will probably never happen. I'm asking for a miracle, when really I should be just disciplined and doing it myself, but I'm always asking myself "What's the point?". The only time I really get off my ass and do anything is if a problem gets big and problematic enough to interfere with my comfortable and idiotic lifestyle.

I complain now, but I'm heading to work in a few minutes, and when I get off my shift tomorrow I'll head to the gym, perform my pointless exercises, and still go home fat and weak, too drained of energy to really do anything else, but vaguely hoping that that energy I expended will someday pay off in a real way, without any idea as to 'how'. I had a couple days off to actually do the dishes and do the laundry, but I just couldn't be bothered. I don't even know why I'm writing about this. I'm sorry.

Don't be so harsh on yourself. Things can seem dark at times but we all have been there one way or another, and things do get better, but not by themselves. It seems you deprecate much on your physical attributes. Can I suggest you start going to a gym? Maybe if you develop some muscle the weakness and cowardliness will improve, which in turn might make you more confident and could help with the other things, like the relationships/virginity (which honestly is not that a big deal) and in turn it might land you on a better job.

If you don't want/can't afford to go to a gym then try to exercise on your home first. Find something you can use as a dumbbell and look on the internet for some basic trainings. Things might snowball, you'll need only a tad of discipline and once you see some improvements you'll might end up going to a gym eventually.

I know this might sound kind of shallow and superficial, but it seems you need more confidence on yourself and this might be one way to get it (and the only one I can think off right now, it's 1 am here). Every single one of us has great potential, never forget that. I refuse to believe there's a Dwarf Fortress player that's not magnificent one way or another.

Now my own rant, it's 1 am and the page for the legalization of documents is down. We need to apostille our documents so they are valid on other countries.

[Kagus]

He is going to the gym, as mentioned in the post. And no, not everyone goes through that, not on the same level. We all have our times of trouble, sure, but it's a minority that goes through it on the daily basis prescribed by getting fucked by the brain chemistry lottery.

For advice, talk to a shrink. Maybe get some meds, they can really help. I'm not saying that you'll suddenly feel great, or even good, but they can help you function. After just a few months on the pills, I had a situation where I felt genuinely angry (at someone else)... it was the first time I could remember feeling angry in almost ten years, and that is an incredible experience to have. I'd lost the capacity to be that "strong", and I wasn't even aware of it.

Whether you have any "real" diagnosis or not isn't really relevant, psychologists are trained to help people get themselves through rough periods like this, and it sounds like you could do with a supporting hand.

And if you talk with someone a few times and it just doesn't feel right, you find a different shrink. There are definitely times when you need to swallow your criticisms and just follow through with the game plan, because not everything is going to make sense or feel like it's moving quickly enough, but you will know if it's just a bad fit between you and the psych. And there will be someone out there who is a better fit.

Actually getting access to a professional can be a bitch though, all depending, but there are options. I haven't tried it myself, but there are even services where you can just have talk appointments online. Just getting in touch with someone is a much bigger deal than it might seem like, and it can certainly be difficult to get going, but it can help you in ways you didn't know you could be helped.

Talk to someone. Preferably not someone who laments over the value reduction of mermaid bones, and also preferably not Dr. Lecter. Beyond those criteria, you've got some more flexibility.

[LordBaal]

He is going to the gym, as mentioned in the post.

Darn how did I miss that... it could have been the sleepless...

Well, follow suit of Kagus advice then. If you are already going to the gym don't drop it, it helps too not only in self improvement but also exercise should make your brain produce endorphins, which will make you feel better.

Didn't knew you had issues with your brain chemistry. That might require meds I guess, in which case a psychiatrist is required to keep tabs on that.

[JoshuaFH]

I didn't say I had issues with my brain chemistry, but I suppose it is something that my shrinks had *strongly* suggested might be the case, so I suppose that possibility is on the table.

[martinuzz]

You should really clean up the mess / dishes / etc. A tidy house really helps with feeling well. Ignoring it is a downward spiral.