On a note thoroughly unrelated, I'm yet again at war with my mother over... everything. The woman has absolutely no conception of boundaries. She thinks that everything she does is for the common good, and so doesn't blink twice at serious violations of others privacy, or even taking my sister's monthly social security check away from her "for her own good". It only occured to me today, as my mother seemed to act as if she was providing for the family, that my mother is literally living off of my sister's money. When I ask her about it, she repeats "The money is for living expenses." I say "Sure, but why do you have the right to decide what her living expenses are? She's legally an adult. If she wants to waste it, that's irresponsible, but completely within her right to do, and NOT within your right to decide." Then, out of nowhere, she accused me of stealing from my sister when I used the money for "living"; I got so frustrated I called my sister over and asked her for the money retroactively, which she agreed to (because she doesn't like my mother's nonsense either). My mother merely glared at me, and started ranting with a new line of argument.
The point isn't the money (although as my mother endlessly attempts to harangue and threaten me into doing what she wants, it may be in the future). It's that she does this endlessly, and believes with absolute certainty that the single best way to make her children more independent is to force them. Not by cutting them off (what would she cut us off from? She doesn't work, and it's my sister that provides the food. She could kick us out, but then she wouldn't eat) but by endlessly lecturing us until we do. She's more concerned about her right to lecture us and dictate our lives (which is dubious at best) than about whether it's smart to do so (which it clearly isn't, but why would that stop her?).
Anyway, I'm sad now because she's going to do that thing where she holds a terrible grudge for several days after an argument.