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[ChairmanPoo]

My mother died in a vehicular accident today.
http://www.kake.com/story/35376144/one-killed-in-tractor-crash-southwest-of-wichita

I am fine, and do not need huggles. I am just sharing that it happened.

I don't know what to say. I'm really sorry 

[martinuzz]

I'm sorry for your loss man. I don't know what else to say.

[Eric Blank]

It is very sad to hear that

[McTraveller]

My mother died in a vehicular accident today.
http://www.kake.com/story/35376144/one-killed-in-tractor-crash-southwest-of-wichita

I am fine, and do not need huggles. I am just sharing that it happened.

Woah. My sad thing today pales in comparison.

[Lord Shonus]

Was the other person in the car also a relative? How badly are they hurt?

[wierd]

My dad was the driver. Alive, discharged from hospital today. Spent all day planning funeral arrangements.

[EnigmaticHat]

My mother died in a vehicular accident today.
http://www.kake.com/story/35376144/one-killed-in-tractor-crash-southwest-of-wichita

I am fine, and do not need huggles. I am just sharing that it happened.

I'm sorry for your loss.

[Ultimuh]

I.. Think I should call/visit my own mother more often.
You have my condolences as well.

[Rolan7]

I'm sorry for your loss ):

[inteuniso]

Going to see my Mother next week. Spending mother's day with my mom (adoptive).

Her energy never left existence.

[WillowLuman]

Damn, wierd. Just... damn. I'm very sorry for your loss.


Finally cut ties with someone who's been an emotional drain for a long while. Felt pretty bad about it, and I've put up with it for a long while thinking that as a friend I should stand by and help this person through their low points. But today I saw the "If you really cared" line. There could be no doubt: emotional manipulation. So I left them a message and cut contact.

Still, it was a hard thing to do. I feel pretty bad about it, even though I know it's for the best in the long run.

Spoiler: doubts (click to show/hide)

Also, having had this happen twice now, though the first time was someone I hardly knew that someone else asked me to help. I'm starting to worry that my methods are unhelpful, and that I might be the kind of person that simply enables negative wallowing rather than support, causing co-dependency and making things worse.

[Tiruin]

-snip-

As someone who had helped you through in most of the stuff that's going on--it ain't you. The line was present long before the If you really cared bit; it's just that that line was on the other person's interpretation of what they see; something they deal with or learned how to cope with things. (you get to see their reaction; the interpretation is before that and between their response and your response) There's a lot more into it but I feel just the same as you, towards both occurrences :/

However, you have tried very well and have given very good advice. Do not generalize your methods as unhelpful when both situation and circumstance/context influence that a lot--especially the mood and tone of the situation; rather, specify into what you can improve of what you did and take things constructively. You have not been enabling their behavior at all, to give my personal feedback.

Also condolences wierd.

[technicallyAdventurer]

ive had a lot of gaps in my memory lately and ive forgotten the entirety of elementary and middle school and i cant remember stuff my friends are talking about from a few months ago and its just! getting to me i guess

[TheBiggerFish]

*hugs TA*
Write things down.  It helps.

[Yoink]

Yeah memory gaps can feel awful, stress can cause a lot of them.
I second the "writing things down" suggestion, I've started keeping a journal lately partly due to my displeasure at getting things muddled up in my memory, or just forgetting them entirely. I think my improved sleeping pattern has helped to improve my memory too, but I imagine everyone is sick of hearing/reading me bang on about that!