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[Orange Wizard]

Also, @Caroline:How much, ideally, would you need?

Probably in the region of $5k-$10k, depending on how far afield she wants to go. US would obviously be the cheapest in terms of travel costs, but somewhere more desirable like Canada/Australia/NZ would be more expensive in the short term.
From what I understand Caroline's an exceptional student so getting residency in NZ as a skilled migrant should be trivial, what with our lax immigration laws and all that.

[IcyTea31]

I cannot exact revenge; that would make me an ingrate, because they have done a lot.

I don't condone revenge, but this isn't true. Gratefulness isn't about letting a person's wrongdoings go just because they did you a good turn once. Abuse is abuse, no matter what has happened in the past, so act appropriately. One (but not the only) appropriate  course of action (in some places; I don't know where you live) would be to get authorities involved. Nobody should suffer as you already have, but there are systems in place to get out of the shithole you're in.

If you want to forgive them, do so because you want to, not because you feel obligated for the things they've done for you.

[scrdest]

David Bowie, Glenn Frey, and now Prince?

2016 is a bad year for musicians it seems.

Also Merle Haggard.

And Lemmy.

And Keith Emerson, though it... wasn't exactly random chance, so to speak.

[TheBiggerFish]

I cannot exact revenge; that would make me an ingrate, because they have done a lot.

I don't condone revenge, but this isn't true. Gratefulness isn't about letting a person's wrongdoings go just because they did you a good turn once. Abuse is abuse, no matter what has happened in the past, so act appropriately. One (but not the only) appropriate  course of action (in some places; I don't know where you live) would be to get authorities involved. Nobody should suffer as you already have, but there are systems in place to get out of the shithole you're in.

If you want to forgive them, do so because you want to, not because you feel obligated for the things they've done for you.

I agree.

Just because someone's been good to you in the past, doesn't mean you need to keep being nice to them if they turn into a raging asshat or start being abusive.

[IcyTea31]

I wouldn't go as far as to make that rule universal. There are some things one shouldn't do even if they wanted to, and some things one should do even if they didn't want to.

[TheBiggerFish]

I wouldn't go as far as to make that rule universal. There are some things one shouldn't do even if they wanted to, and some things one should do even if they didn't want to.

Yeah.

The basic stuff like 'thou shalt not kill', y'know?

[Sinistar]

Also, @Caroline:How much, ideally, would you need?

Probably in the region of $5k-$10k, depending on how far afield she wants to go. US would obviously be the cheapest in terms of travel costs, but somewhere more desirable like Canada/Australia/NZ would be more expensive in the short term.
From what I understand Caroline's an exceptional student so getting residency in NZ as a skilled migrant should be trivial, what with our lax immigration laws and all that.

I hate to be the person who says it, but judging by profile Caroline seems to be a minor (albeit already an older one). Now, I don't know how that works in other parts of the world, but from where I am a minor running away from home would cause social services and possibly police to organize a search and if/when found that person could possibly be in even more trouble unless it is proven he or she is living in unbearable conditions. In Caroline's case specifically you would have to make a strong case against Caroline's parents to make absolutely sure she isn't sent back if found because even if there is a guarantee social services would keep an eye on the situation, living there after runaway would be pretty much impossible, at least assuming from what Caroline has told us. Unless there is a chance such actions would shake up C's parents enough to try and change themselves.

So my suggestion is to grind teeth and hold up till you become officially an adult (18, I'm guessing), Caroline. I know that's easy for me to say but still. You can do it. We are here for you.


SalmonGod: shit man, that sound terrible. I've had neighbor problems in my life before but nothing like this. I truly wish you make it through this.

Trapezohedron: And you too, don't give up, okay? My suggestion would be you put distance between those people, if you can.

[TheBiggerFish]

Isn't there, like, emancipated minor, or some such something?

[chaotic skies]

Why am I still even alive. I'm not worth the effort most days, even to myself; and the days when I am, or naively think I am, get drowned out by the rest of my life. I don't do anything; I waste time listening to music and doing stupid stuff on the internet. I don't hangout with people; I'm awkward as it is, and most if not all of my friends have a grudge against me due to what I said to my ex (which I won't ever let myself forgive or forget, because I had no right to say that). I guess I should be happy, because in my mind I don't inconvinience too many other people, but if I actually stop and think about it, I do. I don't turn in work, I miss the bus, I don't do basic things (like eat or drink), I don't even pay attention when people close to me are hurt or in pain. All I do is waste space and hide behind a facade of happiness and laughter. Most days I don't even think about what I'm doing, because if I did I wouldn't ever do anything. I'm so afraid. I'm afraid of losing. I'm afraid of failing. I'm afraid of not being perfect. I'm afraid of what I can do to people. I'm afraid of what I might do if I actually think. I'm afraid of myself, and I'm so tired of this. I just want to be left alone, to be able to take a break, and relax, and not always be sore from constantly being tense. I can't even sleep that well anymore, because I'm still tense when I sleep. I only get through most days because I know I can come back to my nest of trash in my basement and pretend no one else exists. I just want to be left alone, but everytime I try to push people away they swat my hands away and get up in my face and yell and scream and I'm just so tired. I'd kill myself if I knew it wouldn't affect anyone, but I know it will affect so many people and I don't want that. I don't want to get in the way, or be a pain, or anything else. I just want to disappear, but they won't let go, they just keep pulling me back to their stupid fucking cycle of pain and hatred and I'm just so fucking tired of hurting myself so everyone else can be happy and pretend I'm okay. I can't even cry anymore because they would think something's wrong, and then they'd start to pry and find out all my dirty little secrets that I promised I'd never tell. Everyday I think to myself "Why aren't you dead? You should be dead. You've done enough damage in your short life, you deserve it. Actually, no. You don't deserve death. That's being to merciful. You deserve worse." The only thing that even makes me happy anymore are certain people, and the majority of them are either dead, gone, or hate me, and the rest I see so often I'm starting to not be happy around them anymore. I just want this to end. Why won't it end? Why can't I just walk away, for once, why won't they just let me do my thing? Why do they have to drag me into their stupid fucking messes of relationships and social events and all the shit that comes with them?

[TheBiggerFish]

....

*hugs*

[Orange Wizard]

I hate to be the person who says it,

Oh, right, never mind then.

Isn't there, like, emancipated minor, or some such something?

Yeah, but getting that through the courts is pretty doubtful in C's case.

[KingofstarrySkies]

Got home, grandfather wasn't there. Went out to do some shit involving the car. He was supposed to be back around 4-5. Cut to 8:05, and he finally gets home, shitfaced.

God. Fucking. Damn it. And he called me an 'idiot'. Christ...

[BlackFlyme]

Friend's dad died just yesterday. I have no idea what to say. I sent condolences via text, which feels incredibly impersonal and fake.

[Jopax]

Can't you go to the funereal and give them properly there? Around these parts we have this thing where the family gathers around the coffin before the funereal and folks go in and give condolences. It's quite fucked up actually, and probably one of the hardest things about the whole thing because you have a dead family member right there and this endless stream of people is coming in to shake your hand and tell you they're sorry for your loss. Your hand and mind kinda goes numb after a while and it becomes almost automatic, but then a familiar face comes around and kicks your right back in.

[Helgoland]

Huh - around here we do that after the coffin has been lowered into the grave, while people are casting earth (or flowers or whatever) on it. You take a moment of remembrance, you toss in your rose or something, and then you give your condolences.