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[wilsonns]

The night is stormy. I can fell the evil crawling for his entrance to the main tower.They're one step to the sacred plane, the mana flow is really weak...
I.. can... Feel...

Febser MontainHalls, Granite 27th

The little boy, Sigum Lish,wake up, look around as he usually do when wake, then he go to cabinet to dress, when he open the door, he hears the morning noises, the ones that he usually hears, the sound of his living comunity, all the dwarves living prosperous, everyone working happily.
Sigum goes to Udib's workshop, the craftman that promised to Sigum that will carve stone shortsword, When the boy approaches, Udib exclaims:

_Little Sigum, I worked all the night along in your sword, Look!

A Masterful crafted obsidian sword, menacing with spikes of Microline, encrusted with a claro opal.
The boy high-pitched voice had any words to say to the craftsdwarf creation.
_and... how much does it cost?
_Don't worry, that's a gift.I know that you are planning to settle out from our comunity to have adventures, take it as token of our friendship!
Crying, Sigum ruged Udib.Them, a loud scream comes from the deep of dark hallways, and a miner comes running from that direction...

TO BE CONTINUED...

(In about some hours)

[sava2004]

I'm really liking the way you describe everything, but you migth want to use a spell check, there are alot of errors.

[wilsonns]

I'm really liking the way you describe everything, but you migth want to use a spell check, there are alot of errors.

hehe, sorry, i'm brazilian, and i'm not fluent on english, so, that spell check is a in some site, is a program, or anything else?Give me the link, I'll be thankful!


As seen in the previous part, Sigum have seen the miner running, like fleeing from something...

What will happen with our little boy?

Sigum looks to the miner face, that looks scared, someone asks the miner what happened.
_Blue ore!Strange Chamber!Glowing pit!!!!
No one understood what the scared miner said, and more screams came from the deeper room of the fortress, followed by terrifying urges...A deafening silence takes the craftdwarves room...from the hallway, a sound of footsteps, something with giant claws was approaching.Everyone was ready to run if necessary...And when no one expected, a giant figure comes from the shadow , A winged, horned creature appears and start to makes his victims, followed by other smaller creatures, slightly like frogs, and some other creatures with numerous tenctacles. The panic take all the place, everyone start running around, Sigum take his sword, and pull Udib's arm, start looking for his parents.Udib says that they need to go, that's too late, but Sigum didn't give up, and when they saw, they ran into a hideous creature with tentacles coming out of his back, horns and fangs.When The little child try to run, the demon hold his clothes, then, Sigum pulls his sword and  cut off the creature slimy tentacle, the creature twitches, Sigum and Udib run away...
Sigum arrives in the dinning hall, The floor was covered in blood, and beetween a pile of corpses, Sigum recognizes his father and his mother's faces, an inexplicable felling strikes Sigum, he drops on knees in front of the corpses and starts crying, and because of strong emotions he fainted, and Udib carried Sigum on his back out of the fortress, to far, far away.


That's the end of the first "episode" of the story...
Waiting for your comments

[ventuz]

It seem proper punctuation and grammar have strong impact on story telling, this is good practice on creativity tho.

[wilsonns]

Here comes another chapter from the 7 crystal series


Sigum open his eyes, stunned, he sees Udib gathering some firewood to feed the campfire, he wake and asks what happened;After some explanation, Sigum says that they need to turn back and go to mountainhalls to kill the beasts.
_ARE YOU CRAZY?!?!?
Exclaimed Udib, Sigum looks to the starry night, Udib talks with Sigum.
_I know that... your parents are... dead... But there's nothingwe can do aginst that.If we go back to Febser, we will die.Do you want Revenge?
Sigum shakes his head positively.
_Ok, I will go to the human town to work there, you will need to go to the Urist dojo, it's far away from the human town that I am going, if you want to go there to train, we will need to separate...
Sigum answer:
_I know, I will settle off to that place right now.
Sigum points to north and asks:
_It's that direction?Right?
Udib don't answer, they both stand up and hug.
Sigum start to move, just a child, a ten years old child, against a wild and dangerous world.
After some hours walking, Sigum was by a road, he takes that way, after walking a bit more, a strange green creature jumps from a shrub, The creature has a dagger and a bag.
_W...Who are you?
_OBMSKAITREASD!!!
The creature says something impossible to understand, and run in Sigum direction, trying to slash the boy with his bloody dagger.Sigum falls in the ground, dodging from the green man's attack, when he stand up, he ran to the oposite direction that he was going...When he cannot see the creature, he stop running, look back, and continue walking.
After a long walking, Sigum Reaches a town with unbearded tall people, Sigum know that they are the humans, and know not too much language, but know the basics.Sigum sees various buildings and shops, with some coins in his wallet, he runs toward a delicious and irresistible smell of food, when he arrives in the place, he sees a fat woman with several dishes of cooked plump helmets, when he gets to the counter, a beautiful girl asks what he wants, and he just answer:
_Food...
The woman keep looking at his face by a couple of seconds, and them screams:
_Moe, bake some cat biscuits now
After some minutes, the girl bring the biscuits and give to Sigum, that starts to eat then frenetically, the girl asks for the money, he gives 2 cooper coins, that's all he got, then the girl says that it costs 7 coins, he look at his wallet and see no more money, The girl asks a big guy,to beat Sigum, Sigum Understood that nothing good will happen, and then run from the guy, some other people that was in the inn start to chase Sigum too...


What will happen with our little hero in thee next chapter???

See in the next part of the story, coming soon

[sava2004]

Here, i spell checked the story for you. Most of the online spell-checkerswould make it worse instead of improving it.

PART 1

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

The little boy, Sigum Lish, woke up, he looked around like he usually does when wakes, then he went to cabinet to get dressed, when he opens the door, he hears the morning noises, the ones that he usually hears, the sound of his living comunity, all the dwarves living prosperously, everyone working happily.
Sigum goes to Udib's workshop, the craftsdwarf that promised Sigum that he would carve him a stone shortsword. When the boy approaches, Udib exclaims:

"Little Sigum, I worked all the night along in your sword, Look!"

A Masterfuly crafted obsidian sword, menacing with spikes of Microline, encrusted with a claro opal.
The boys high-pitched voice has no words to say to the craftsdwarf's creation.
"and... how much does it cost?"
"Don't worry, that's a gift.I know that you are planning to settle out from our comunity to have adventures, take it as token of our friendship!"
Crying, Sigum huged Udib. Then, a loud scream comes from the deep of dark hallways, and a miner comes running from that direction...

PART 2

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

As seen in the previous part, Sigum saw the miner running, almost as if he were fleeing from something...

What will happen to our little boy?

Sigum looks to the miner's face, he looks scared, someone asks the miner what happened.
"Blue ore!Strange Chamber!Glowing pit!!!!"
No one understood what the scared miner said, and more screams came from the deeper room of the fortress, followed by terrifying gurgles...A deafening silence takes the craft room...from the hallway, a sound of footsteps, something with giant claws was approaching.Everyone was ready to run if necessary...And when no one expected, a giant figure comes from the shadow , A winged, horned creature appears and start to makes his victims, followed by other smaller creatures, slightly like frogs, and some other creatures with numerous tenctacles. Panic takes everyone, they start running around, Sigum take his sword, and pull Udib's arm, start looking for his parents.Udib says that they need to go, that's too late, but Sigum didn't give up, and when they ran, they ran into a hideous creature with tentacles coming out of his back, horns and fangs.When The little child tried to run, the demon held his clothes, then, Sigum pulled out his sword and cut off the creature slimy tentacles, the creature twitches, Sigum and Udib run away...
Sigum arrives in the dinning hall, The floor was covered in blood, and beetween a pile of corpses Sigum recognizes his father and his mother's faces. an inexplicable felling strikes Sigum, he drops on knees in front of the corpses and starts crying, and because of strong emotions he faints, Udib picks him up on his back out of the fortress, and caries him far, far away.

TO BE CONTINUED...

[wilsonns]

Ok, I'll use quotes instead of the underline.I was using it beacuse in portuguese, when someone talk in texts, we use the underline, thanks for your help sava2004!


Sigum runs to a dead end road, when the mans arrive, he sit on the ground and pulls his sword, one of the men says:
"Nice sword!I'll get at least 150 gold coins for it."
Sigum points the sword to the man, that ironically says:
"Oh!The dwarven child will hurt me?"
Then, one of them fall on the ground with a arrow stuck in his back, the other men looks back, and see a figured dressed in a midnight blue cloak and robe on top of the roof of a building.The unknown says in a deep voice, that seemed to be a male voice:
"get away from the boy if you all want to stay alive!"
The men laugh loud, and then pull his weapons, one has a small battle axe, and two has short swords, the mysterious man jumps from the rooftop and lands on the ground, and kept his crossbow, and adverted:
"I'll defeat all you with my bare hands!"
The mans charge in his direction, Sigum closes his eyes, don't willing to see the end of the man, he hear fight sounds, when the noise stops, he open his eyes slightly to see what hapenned, and he sees the man beetween the fainted men, The unknown man walks toward Sigum,  and raises his hand in his direction, trying to helkp Sigum to get up. The man put his hand in Sigum head and says:
"Be careful boy, be careful..."
The man walks to somewhere without even identify, Sigum runs to try find the man beetween the crowd, after fail to find the man,Sigum looks to the skies and says:
" I'll avenge your death, father!"
Sigum walks to a dirty road leading to the outskirts of the town, and them, heads to Urist dojo...