Just went to an Indian restaurant called Maharaja not far from my house and ate in.
By "in" I mean, sitting in an actual restaurant, and not your typical, dingy, Indian family restaurant, but a rather fancy one- I mean, I was actually
shown to a table by some guy manning the front desk. If I remembered every time in my life I've had such a fancy dining experience I could probably count them on my fingers; I generally prefer avoid the full-on restaurant experience even with a group, never mind all on my oddy
knocky.
The Happy, though? I wasn't overwhelmed by anxiety like one would expect. I thought I was going to be paralysed in my chair, or that I'd start shaking with nerves and knocking shit over. Hell, I wasn't even dressed like I would have if I'd planned on eating in-- my plan was just to grab a pie from a bakery and eat it as I walked, I was just wearing a band shirt (with artwork involving a minotaur ripping a cone through a bong made of human bones), raggedly cut-off black shorts and my doom jacket with the moss growing on the sleeves.
Hardly something I'd choose to wear if my aim was to feel comfortable sitting in a restaurant dining room, and this place was quite crowded, yet
somehow I managed to keep my cool and eat my meal without issue. I was almost anxious about
not being anxious, that's what a strange and unexpected experience it was.
The food was pretty great, too, but that's nowhere near as exciting as this solid victory in the war against my neuroses.
Also I doubt this post made much sense, I'm crammed so full of food that it's probably pressing against my brain. Somehow.