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[kaijyuu]

Not even genetic engineering could make me a pegasus.

_{^{No matter how much I want one.}}

[Vorthon]

But it could make miniature tigers. Which would be the coolest things ever.

[Jopax]

Have you considered wrapping it in bacon? What about maple syrup?

Nope.

Some things are perfect, adding or removing would break the perfection, this is one of those things. So if you want to ruin a perfectly perfect meal with anything, feel free, but stay away from mine

[Nadaka]

But it could make miniature tigers. Which would be the coolest things ever.

We have those already. Mine weighs only 13 lbs and his name is Maximus. He has stripes black on black (the base color is a deep chocolate with black stripes, but its only noticeable in good sunlight).

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

[Vorthon]

But I want actual miniature tigers! With the ability to roar! But it'd come all funny because they'd be so tiny.

[kaijyuu]

You mean, a meow?

[Vorthon]

... Shut up! Stop destroying my dreams!

Anywhozits, Have a Dovasquid:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

[Frumple]

Octopi learn dragonspeak; invent arial jet self-propulsion. Fusrodah heralds new age of ballistic personal transportation. Humankind devastated by attack of the octopi trained 20 m/s flying jetsquid. World ends because of that dovakkin' octopus.

[Vorthon]

... I am so tempted to run a D&D campaign where the Big Bad is an talking octopus.

[Nadaka]

... I am so tempted to run a D&D campaign where the Big Bad is an talking octopus.

He should have a proper English gentleman's accent, and get really annoyed when people assume he is Cthulhu.

[Hanslanda]

... I am so tempted to run a D&D campaign where the Big Bad is an talking octopus.

He should have a proper English gentleman's accent, and get really annoyed when people assume he is Cthulhu.

This. Really, culturally annoyed. Like, "Sigh. See, this is why I have to ruin your entire civilization. You're such simpletons. 'Ahh! It's got tentacles! Must be Cthulhu!' Cthulhu is in the Pacific Ocean. I'm on land. Do some math, barbarians."

[Levi]

Let's face it: We need to improve genetic engineering, so we can bring back animals that have gone extinct. Or at least decent approximations. Also, I want miniaturized versions of big animals. Because.

Pssh, we've had that technology in Canada for ages.  It just led to pests like the house hippo.

[Descan]

Yeah, h+ is a good magazine.

Also, feh upon thee! There's a reason I'm going into Neuroscience!

that reason being immortal machine god Descan, being all immortal and machiney and gody over a backwoods planet

[Hanslanda]

Now you have no excuse to hate everyone everywhere.

Sometimes, people make me happy. Also, I think I'm going to wear an Islam shirt next time I go to Drug Court, because religious freedom.

[Loud Whispers]

Now you have no excuse to hate everyone everywhere.

Yeah I do, I don't click on links to cracked because they make up most of the stuff anyways. It's like a giant wall of movie text "based on true stories."

:|

Your move humanity.