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[Vector]

[ToonyMan]

yes yes yes

Yes yes yes yes

[Cthulhu]

Repeated misuse of "thine"

>:<

It's still pretty funny though, if someone cleaned it up it would be pure comedy gold.

Spoiler: Relevant, something I made a while ago (click to show/hide)

Shall I regale thee with the tale of how myne lyfe was cast into disarray? I shall put aside myne duties to tell thee. Pray, sit. I shall tell thee the tale of how I once becayme prince of a fief knowne as Belle-Aire.

Bourne and raysed in Westerne Phille Adelphia was I, spending the grayter portione of myne days at the faire groundes. Idling away long hours, and being quyte dashing, if I do say so myne selfe, I was enjoyinge a frendelie fencing matche when a bande of younge rapscalliones, clearly up to no goode, begane to accoste myne selfe and myne companiones. I did quarrele sorely with these blaggardes, but myne mothere was sore afrayde for me. She did saye "Thou wilt go to live with thy aunte and thy uncle, in Belle-Aire"

I did begge and plęde daye and nyghte, but she put myne possessiones in a travellinge case and did send me on myne way.
She gayve me a kisse and then gayve me a writ of travele, as was requyred in the lawlesse backe countrie that didst surrounde Belle-Aire. So I hired a minstrel and sayd "I maye as welle relaxe, seeinge as I have no waye to esckaype myne predickamente"

Myne travele ackomodationes were moste agreeable, and I didst sip the juice of ouranges from a champaigne glass imported from Parise.
I wonderede if the people of Belle-Aire did live lyke unto this, and if they did mayhappe myne situatione was notte so grievouse.

It didst crosse myne mynde that the residentes of Belle-Aire maye be unackustomede to myne urban ways. Why wouldst myne mothere sende me to a playce lyke unto this? I decidede to wayte and see...

Finallie, the carriage arrived and a gruffe fellow was holdinge a signe, bearinge myne name. I was sore afrayde he had come to do me harm, so like quicksilvere I fled.

I whistlede for a carriage and when it approachede I did see a sign bearinge the worde "FRESHE" and knucklebones hanging insyde. I can onlie say this carriage was unique. I did sorelie need trans pourte, so I sayd "Good sir, tayke me to Belle-Aire"

T'was approachinge Vespers when we arryved at the keepe. I shouted to the dryvere, "Good sir, I shalle see thee an othere daye!" I lookede upon myne kyngdome, myne journie had endede.

I did reclyne on myne throune, as the Prince of Belle-Aire.

[Enzo]

So I went to the pigpen to provide my fingerprints and DNA tonight. Fingerprints were straightforward enough, for the DNA test I figured they'd do one of them fancy swabs or something. Not so. They prick a finger and bleed a few drops onto this little card. I have notoriously low blood pressure. It took literally 20 minutes to get six drops out of me. By the end the cop was squeezing my finger as hard as he could and going "WHY WON'T YOU BLEED" and I was just like C:

Hands down, best time I've had at a police station. Would DNA test again.

[ChairmanPoo]

Why did you have to give a dna sample?

[ToonyMan]

Pirates are arrested on sight.

Oh crap I'm a Straw Hat pirate.

[Aklyon]

Must encapsulate en masse!

[alway]

Anonymous DDoSed the US Copyright Office website for 30 mins today. Which is either funny because they launched a cyberattack on the US government and got away with it or funny because they won't get away with it and get rounded up and put in gitmo.

[Enzo]

Why did you have to give a dna sample?

They're going to use my DNA to clone an army of super-cops. It's going to be awesome.

No, nothing altogether dramatic. Armed robbery where I work. They know who did it but can't quite pin it on him (cameras are useless against the obfuscating powers of a hoodie). They have something with all the staffs DNA on it as well as the perp's, so we're all doing voluntary DNA tests. I have a general distrust of the cops but they probably won't use my DNA to track down my hordes of illegitimate children so I'm probably safe.

[ToonyMan]

The marines are on to you!

[Solifuge]

Lo, and such a body of the fantastical transpires hereabouts, that the enjoyment I derive from the transpirances hence is truly of a most grand scale.

[Rose]

Got a paying gig working with a seamstress.

is this the traditional meaning of the word, or the diskworld meaning?

[Karnewarrior]

I just got through reading some Terry Pratchett but I never heard about seamstresses.

[Rose]

did you read the night watch novels?

Spoiler: Clarification (click to show/hide)

in Guards! Guards!, captain carrot boards with a certain Rosie Palms, teh head of the guild of seamstresses. they provide services to men who have been travelling and have been away from their wives for a very long time. they can also stitch their pants while they are not being used.

[Akigagak]

I'm thinking about going down to Blockbuster tomorrow and picking up a few rental DVDs. Any recommendations for films?


Completely unrelated, I might also be kicking up my livestream again tomorrow night.