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[Phantom of The Library]

Just learned about forum derp, so wishes do come true...

Ah, but you wished for it to be six years ago, not three.
Out of interest though, what was it like?

[GlyphGryph]

A tale of tragedy becomes a tale of victory.

My day has been... interesting:
Take train to Boston from, take bus home. Really, really need to use the toilet.
Run home, reach door, discover that door... is locked. And Jen, in New Hampshire, has the keys. Okay, I think, front door.
Foyer door is locked as well. Can't get get into the front hallway. Need to use bathroom bad. Okay, I think... I can get into the Foyer from the basement.
Go around to the back, open storm doors, fight through mass of webs and spiders, get basement door open, work my way through the pitch blackness of the basement and up the stairs in to the hallway. Sweet, I'm in! Now, onto the...
Why is the door to the hallway locked.
We NEVER lock the door to the hallway.
Shit.
WAIT. I remember making fun of this doors use as a barrier because the bolts were on the outside. I try everything I can to pry the bolts out, but I've got nothing really suited for the purpose. They aren't budging.
I take out my emergency paperclip, starting to get desperate. I need to go, REALLY bad. Thread it around the bolt - if I pull, it should open... except it's too short to pull. Can't get a grip. And then I drop it down the heating vent.

I stand there for a moment, just looking at it.

Okay, not time to give up yet. I unlock the front door, step out onto the porch, and begin trying windows. Everyone I can reach is secure. Except... Six feet off the ground, there's the tiny window to the bathroom. 2 feet wide, less than that tall, at least the part that can open. But I remember us joking about it missing the screen. Was it locked? I was running out of options, and I didn't need to use the bathroom for something I'd be comfortable doing behind the house. It HAD to work.
So what do I have to prop me up? A turned over flower vase lets me reach the window and... YES. It opens.

I'm done yet though - it's still way up there. And very small. I don't even know if I can fit through it. I look around for a way to make my height pile bigger. Trashcan? Collapses. Damn. Gotta use our deck table. Out incredibly unstable, wobbly deck table. I climb onto to it, clinging to the window. It's still high enough that I can barely get me chest up to it. But I'm driven by need now - I climb!

And get stuck. There's not enough rooms to get my arms through - my shoulders fill the entire thing, and I've got nothing to press off to get further in. Well, fuck. After wiggling back out, I turn my experience crawling through caves to my advantage - I know if I can throw myself up, I go both arms first and do a half twist, and be able to slide in - assuming my arms are strong enough to do all the work. It's been a while. And I'm going to half to jump to manage it, and jump hard. The table I was on wasn't going to survive that without going flying, no question. But what choice did I have?

Breath. Jump. Twist. Scrabble for purchase - catch the end of the sink with one hand. Ignore the curtain - Jen will kill me if I pull that down. Okay, got through up to my chest, and... definitely dangling. I still don't even know if I can fit my hips through this thing - but at this point, I'm committed. I try to pull myself through. My legs brace themselves against the wall, I walk my ass up, and slide through to my hips.

Shit. Why didn't I take the stuff out of my pockets? I pull. I twist. And... it's giving. But there's a no problem - where the hell am I going to GO? If I pull myself in any more, I've got nothing to grip.

Fine. Have to do it in one go then - pull, put arms out, dive head first into the floor and hope it works out.

Yank, yank, yank, sliiiiiiiideCRASH.

Oh god it hurts. I stand up. Close the window. But I made it. I actually made it. Sitting down on the toilet, I can only think quietly to myself.

"Winning!"

I'm like absurdly proud of myself right now.

[Frumple]

Impressive!

... also another object lesson on why to never leave a place of residence without a (much easier than that!) way back in

[Shook]

THAT

Is the most epic journey to a dump() ever. Well played, very well indeed!

[rarborman]

Story  reminds me of climbing in my mothers house windows, if you've ever clawed into a 6x8 inch basement window you find jumping through windows easy from then on.

6 year ago was scary, VN my overshadower, and flat Df, 3 year ago would much better suit me less changes.

[SalmonGod]

Witnessing an orgy of violence as an accursed ash cloud just swept through my pastures, turning all my 80 or so of my livestock and a nearby flock of raven men into thralls.  They're all ripping each other to pieces now and coming back as zombies. 

There are huge streaks of blood and body parts all over the place.  I think a couple of my bunnies somehow got thrown way up in the air, because as I was watching, they suddenly fell out of the sky and exploded on the ground.

That, or the "evil region material rain" chose bunnies for its material. Which would be awesome.

My last embark was constantly raining or snowing dwarf blood.  Whole surface was pure crimson all the time.  I was guessing rain had to be liquid materials?  If it could rain bunnies from the sky... insanity.  Just plain awesome insanity.  So far it's only been two bunnies, though.  Not quite a rain.  I still have no idea how it happened.

Wow.  So apparently the cursed ash leaves a tainted residue on everything... or something... because I sent my people above ground to see if they could retrieve some supplies, and they instantly became thralls as well.

Next!

[Phantom of The Library]

I take out my emergency paperclip,

Thank you for reminding me that I need a new one.

[SirAaronIII]

Heheheh, nice.

[Knight of Fools]

I was reading up on some Visual Basic for a project due today. The book's talking about comparing letters and words to each other - Basically, if a letter is further down the alphabet than another one, it's "greater than" a word with a lesser value.

I realized that if I did this with my RL name, Zach, my name would come out "greater than" almost anyone else's name.

I liked programming before I realized this, but now that it's appealing to my ego, I love it.

[Frumple]

I just realized there's a minute possibility that, far into a dystopia future of resource scarcity, spam (of the electronic sense) may be made a death-sentence level crime of energy misuse.

That's kinda' a cheerful thought.

[Knight of Fools]

If that were the case, the same would apply to playing video games and watching Youtube videos.

[Frumple]

Yeah, there'd be downsides. I can seperate the sad of no video games from the happy of hung hydroponic'd live spam peddlers.

[Heliman]

I got more gol gappa today! To date it's the best food i've ever seen come out of india that didn't result in a visit from ole montezuma' revenge

[freeformschooler]

I've coordinated and put most of the work into a collaborative speech project for a public speaking class at my local community college.

I'm in high school. The other project members are grown men and women.

[Zona]

The Idle Thumbs podcast is coming back! They put up a kickstarter and met their 30k goal in Two Hours.