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[hector13]

I just had this conversation before with someone else, I haven't the slightest how :x

Shipping is a crush on someone else's behalf, or alternatively an expression of the desire to engineer your environment to its fullest. So all you need to do is find yourself in the company of someone else while also being observed by someone else with a keen interest in other people's business.

That I know, I was sort of bringing up a sort of... ineptness? Inexperience? In more, more basic social (...environments? Situations?) Agh, the general, main idea of the point I'm trying to begin to articulate, that's understood at least, right?

Well the best way to get better at being in social situations is being in social situations. Some people are better at it than others (you bloody extroverts!) but it is a skill, and it's one that can be developed.

One way to get good at talking with the types of folk you find attractive is to find those people in your family or friends and chat away with them. You will find that similar types of people will have similar types of interests, allowing you to add to your encyclopedia of things to discuss with new people. One thing I learned while working in retail is that most people are generally quite happy to go on and on (and on and on...) if you show a little bit of interest in them.

't internet is another way, though the major drawback with that vs. meatspace communication is there is no backspace key in meatspace, and you don't have quite as much time to formulate a reply, so it's basically just a way to get used to communicating with other folk, and a way to start off. B12 is a good place, as the folk around here are generally quite respectful of different views, and there's a feckin' lot of them about.

[Adragis]

ben

[Harry Baldman]

That I know, I was sort of bringing up a sort of... ineptness? Inexperience? In more, more basic social (...environments? Situations?) Agh, the general, main idea of the point I'm trying to begin to articulate, that's understood at least, right?

Oh, that. In addition to developing your skill at reading people by being near other people (a skill that likely gets more difficult to acquire the longer you procrastinate on acquiring it), there's a bunch of things you could try on that front, most of them likely obvious.

Something I've found helpful is the comparison of day-to-day conversation with stand-up comedy. When you watch somebody do stand-up, you are essentially enjoying the privilege of having a fun conversation with no investment on your part. The art of it is being able to carry on an interesting conversation all by yourself, while day-to-day conversation is obviously much easier due to probably having the other person to steer you into directions that they personally find interesting.

Point is, to be interesting (which is a prerequisite to be anything beyond merely accepted by someone else) you need material. Fresh material. Preferably funny or interesting material, too.

[miauw62]

dude im like 17 and you're like 15.

i am now the person telling you that it's going to be alright when i was in exactly the same situation two years ago, and when people told me that i didn't believe them, so if you don't believe this i take like no offense at all, and if in two years (or more, or less) time you think "huh i guess he was right" i wont like come out of your closet and yell "TOLD YA" in a loud voice before disappearing in a puff of smoke, ill just be sort of happy for you.

the trick is just to try and hang out with girls more, which sucks bc it's hard if you're a nerd like me and all your hobbies are like, 95% male. so the trick is actually to try and not give a fuck about that, fail, actually give a fuck about that and then go out and do more hobbies anyway. ive expanded my group of friends significantly, went to my first con and taken over the school's chess club with magic the gathering in the last two years, and none of that shit helped me get a date with the girl i currently have a date with. except it did because it was all totally fucking worth it and made me feel more confident about my identity as a huge fucking nerd.

but hey apparently you're bisexual so some of this doesn't apply, im still a hormonal teenager too so i really have no idea how any of this applies to people who aren't me, let alone people with different sexualities.

the gist of it is that you should totally continue giving a fuck about all of this because it is pretty important IF YOU THINK IT'S IMPORTANT but it'll probably be ok. if you see like a chance anywhere to go do something that interests you where you'll know nobody and most other people won't know people either, it might be a good idea to go and do it.

i hope this late night ramble is somehow useful to you, dude

[BlackHeartKabal]

That I know, I was sort of bringing up a sort of... ineptness? Inexperience? In more, more basic social (...environments? Situations?) Agh, the general, main idea of the point I'm trying to begin to articulate, that's understood at least, right?

Oh, that. In addition to developing your skill at reading people by being near other people (a skill that likely gets more difficult to acquire the longer you procrastinate on acquiring it), there's a bunch of things you could try on that front, most of them likely obvious.

Something I've found helpful is the comparison of day-to-day conversation with stand-up comedy. When you watch somebody do stand-up, you are essentially enjoying the privilege of having a fun conversation with no investment on your part. The art of it is being able to carry on an interesting conversation all by yourself, while day-to-day conversation is obviously much easier due to probably having the other person to steer you into directions that they personally find interesting.

Point is, to be interesting (which is a prerequisite to be anything beyond merely accepted by someone else) you need material. Fresh material. Preferably funny or interesting material, too.

I never did see the point behind comparisons other than making things easier to understand, because if two things are different, they're different. I don't watch stand-up comedy much ( I want to now, since you've bought it up ), so maybe it's just that I don't really know much about either of the things you're comparing. It's still a good point, and duly considered. About material, everyone has a different idea of funny and interesting, which is one of many... blocks in progress that I want to make. I still (think) that I see the point you're trying to make. Probably because you've explicitly stated it.

dude im like 17 and you're like 15.

i am now the person telling you that it's going to be alright when i was in exactly the same situation two years ago, and when people told me that i didn't believe them, so if you don't believe this i take like no offense at all, and if in two years (or more, or less) time you think "huh i guess he was right" i wont like come out of your closet and yell "TOLD YA" in a loud voice before disappearing in a puff of smoke, ill just be sort of happy for you.

the trick is just to try and hang out with girls more, which sucks bc it's hard if you're a nerd like me and all your hobbies are like, 95% male. so the trick is actually to try and not give a fuck about that, fail, actually give a fuck about that and then go out and do more hobbies anyway. ive expanded my group of friends significantly, went to my first con and taken over the school's chess club with magic the gathering in the last two years, and none of that shit helped me get a date with the girl i currently have a date with. except it did because it was all totally fucking worth it and made me feel more confident about my identity as a huge fucking nerd.

but hey apparently you're bisexual so some of this doesn't apply, im still a hormonal teenager too so i really have no idea how any of this applies to people who aren't me, let alone people with different sexualities.

the gist of it is that you should totally continue giving a fuck about all of this because it is pretty important IF YOU THINK IT'S IMPORTANT but it'll probably be ok. if you see like a chance anywhere to go do something that interests you where you'll know nobody and most other people won't know people either, it might be a good idea to go and do it.

i hope this late night ramble is somehow useful to you, dude

miauw, this is something I'd like to take to PMs and Steam and stuff, if you have the time. I don't want to... insult (there's a better word to convey my point, but w/e) everyone else who's been trying to help, but this post just... clicks with me, and I'd prefer to respond in some privacy.

[MaximumZero]

dude im like 17 and you're like 15.

Damn kids, get the hell off my lawn.

[miauw62]

Yeah dude just send those PMs, it's 11 PM here but I'll read and reply tomorrow

[KingofstarrySkies]

dude im like 17 and you're like 15.

Damn kids, get the hell off my lawn.

* Koss dances provocatively on the lawn.

WHAT NOW

[hector13]

dude im like 17 and you're like 15.

Damn kids, get the hell off my lawn.

* Koss dances provocatively on the lawn.

WHAT NOW

My father-in-law shoots the pests on his lawn.

[TempAcc]

Shotgun tiem? Shotgun tiem.

[KingofstarrySkies]

Pah. I'm no pest! I'm a koss. Silly Hector. And max wouldn't use a shotgun-That is for lesser beings.

[TempAcc]

Exactly.

[BlackHeartKabal]

So you're saying Max is a lesser being, Temp? 

[TempAcc]

Everything becomes a lesser being with enough vodka.

[MaximumZero]

I don't need shotguns. My guns never run out of ammo.

* MaximumZero flexes.