This one makes so much sense! It's a kind of bridge troll!
Entity Travesties:
[WEAPON:WINTER] <--- Russian dwarves?
[CAN_HAMMER]
[ENT:ANY_DETAINING:ACCEPTABLE] <--- guess they don't like ents...
[MAX_POP_NUMBER:1] <--- how lonely...
[ETHIC:KILLER]
[ENT_MODIFIER:3] <---- modifying the detained ents now?
[CAN_CLUB]
[PANTS_SITE:TRIGGER:TRAPCOMMON] <--- lol
[SIEGE_ENEMY:ACCEPTABLE]
[USE_BREAKINGS:COMMON]
[ARMOR_ROAD]
[WEAPON:PANTER] <--- what happens when you use that weapon against an enemy who isn't wearing pants?
[PERMITTED_JOB:FISH_EXILED] <--- I'd love a job where i exile fish
[RELIGION:MILL_ENEMY:ACCEPTABLE] <--- sounds normal...
[CURRENCY_BODYGUARDS] <--- good ol' mercenaries
[START_IMPROVEMENT_KILL_PLANTER] <--- that's not an improvement!
[PERMITTED_JOB:BRIDGE]
[ARMOR_FUN:ACCEPTABLE] <--- weee!
[INSTRUMENT_HUMAN]
[SCOUTDOOR_FACE]
[PANTS_TROLLABLE]
[USE_MILKERY]
[BIOME:ANY_AXE_BRIDGE]
[PERMITTED_JOB:ANIMALS:ACCEPTABLE]
[PERMITTED_JOB:FISH_SERIOUS] <--- serious fish is serious
[ETHIC:ASSMAKER] <--- uh...
[TOY_HALFLING]
Race Travesties:
[BODYGLOWTILE:women:ratwoman_males] <--- er.... ratwoman_males?
[STANCE:kick:kick:kick:kick:kick:kicks:1:1:2:BLUDGEON]
[ATTACK:SECOND:BYTYPE:MODESTY:EXCITEMENT] <--- attack with modesty...to cause excitement?
[CHILD:150] <--- thats an old child
[SWIMS_LEARMS:BRAIN:BYTYPE:MOUTH] <--- wait, what?
[LAYERING:evil bearorcs] <--- EEK!
[HOME:pony foal:pony mammoth:woolly goat's milk:7:0:0:1] <--- pony mammoth?
[CHILDNAME:baby calves] <--- redundant repetition
They detain the ents [ENT:ANY_DETAINING:ACCEPTABLE] to repair their bridge, [ENT_MODIFIER:3] which is the only thing they can live on due to [BIOME:ANY_AXE_BRIDGE], and [PERMITTED_JOB:BRIDGE].
They guard the bridge, alone, [MAX_POP_NUMBER:1], killing anyone who tries to use it. [ETHIC:KILLER] Indeed, they're so vile that any life-affirming farmers will automatically die just by setting foot on the bridge owned by this troll. [START_IMPROVEMENT_KILL_PLANTER]
While they can use hammers and clubs, [CAN_HAMMER][CAN_CLUB], they prefer to kick six times. (Over seven legs per individual?) [STANCE:kick:kick:kick:kick:kick:kicks:1:1:2:BLUDGEON] Their attack is wintry, [WEAPON:WINTER], causing people to wear their pants for warmth. [WEAPON:PANTER] Their traps, which they set lots of, are similar. [PANTS_SITE:TRIGGER:TRAPCOMMON]. If you prove resistant to pantings, they'll lay siege to you. [SIEGE_ENEMY:ACCEPTABLE].
Their obsession with pants is primarily about modesty, which they use as a secondary, but very exciting, magical weapon. [ATTACK:SECOND:BYTYPE:MODESTY:EXCITEMENT]
You can tell when the bridge you're coming up to is guarded, because the road will be missing chunks, which the great beast wears, [ARMOR_ROAD], with great delight. [ARMOR_FUN:ACCEPTABLE].
Having panted, clubbed, hammered, or kicked you to death, they'll often keep your corpse for a rainy day, if you're human or halfling. [INSTRUMENT_HUMAN] [TOY_HALFLING]. With these, they make horrible fools of themselves, with great dedication. [ETHIC:ASSMAKER] Everyone else is ground for bread, even other bridge trolls. [RELIGION:MILL_ENEMY:ACCEPTABLE]
When they're not killing trespassers or playing with the remains, they make their livelihood in various bridge related ways. Primarily they fish, [PERMITTED_JOB:FISH_SERIOUS] and gain magical power by ritually banishing some of their catch from the bridges territorial waters. [PERMITTED_JOB:FISH_EXILED]. Although they do not scruple at banishing other animals as well. [PERMITTED_JOB:ANIMALS:ACCEPTABLE]. Sometimes, if you stay well back from the bridge, they can be induced to trade, but their coin is bodyguards, living or dead. [CURRENCY_BODYGUARDS]
As surprising as it might seem in such a bizarre creature, they must learn to swim, and they learn with their brain. Not convinced they're bizarre? They swim with their mouth. [SWIMS_LEARMS:BRAIN:BYTYPE:MOUTH]
And mouth-swim is only the beginning. They're pretty ugly. [SCOUTDOOR_FACE]. Yes, their faces look like postern gates. So ugly that natural selection has allowed them to remain juveniles for incredibly long times, to avoid the duties of maturity. [CHILD:150] During this time, they're less ugly. [CHILDNAME:baby calves] Lest you think it's just their face, their insulating fat appears to be heinous orc-bear hybrids. [LAYERING:evil bearorcs]
It is speculated that this is related to both their excitement at modesty, and the following...
[PANTS_TROLLABLE] means they're both pant-wearing trolls, and will troll/grief you with their pants, to, obviously, get you to wear pants.
Despite their vile natures and appearances, they will often take orphaned pony foals and baby horsamammoths into their home and nuture them, even if only for the milk, [HOME:pony foal:pony mammoth:woolly goat's milk:7:0:0:1] which they use in the arcane art of milkery. [USE_MILKERY] It is unknown what they use the milkery for, but their modesty attacks is one possibility.
Author
Topic: RAW travesties and AI: "Auto Revenging Ass" (Read 364282 times)