I HATE HATE HATE all i (whatever) users. Be it the iPod, iPhone, iVibrator, I don't care. If you own one you are, without any doubt, a failure in the basic principles of monetary policy. It doesn't matter how pretty you think the iExtension is, the fact of the matter is that no matter WHAT you reason. No matter WHAT your budget. No matter whatever. You can get something better that would suit your needs (other than just pretentiousness... like driving a hybrid car) than an iWank.
iWhatever users. You're all, universally, complete failures. Don't ever come near me. You're probably the kind of person who thinks you're doing the environment a favor when you switch to a hybrid / electric car when the total energy consumed from the production of that car including the total energy those cars actually use exceeds that of a regular gas guzzler or that the world is a better place when you give to international aid foundations not realizing that over 80% of that money will go into bribes paid to warlords and dictators. Or vegans who don't realize that more animals are killed from grain harvesting or soybean cultivation than from pasture management. Posers. Worms. Cowards all. Don't infect me with your monotone and simpleton thought processes. If you want to be sheep, go ahead, but expect me to laugh at you when you wonder why you never progress anywhere in life.
I think Mac users are fine though. There are certainly good reasons to switch to a Mac. Just talking about the other "i" line of products like the iPhone, iPod Touch, iPod, etc.
I also hate HATE HATE HATE HATE people who constantly state the obvious. Argh, bloody dipshits have the permanent mindset of a three-year-old. "Oh, you're drinking milk now." "Hey, you're playing Guitar Hero." "No, humans need more than water, oxygen, and food to live." No shit? Any other sparkling pearls of wisdom you would like to spread? Would you like to state how big of a douchebag you are? It would give you a combo bonus multiplier. You don't pretend to be smart by saying things EVERYONE ELSE ALREADY KNOWS. I don't need you to point out that my sentence was a bloody sexual innuendo. Everyone knows my goddamn sentence was a sexual innuendo. I don't need you to point out that my plan to have a giant orbital satellite launch a giant fishing hook to pull people into space via their nipples is unfeasible because no one would pay for it. Of course no one would pay for it, you moron. Shut the hell up and lock yourself inside your room and starve yourself to death for all our sakes.
I also HATE people who act like I don't know what they're talking about like it's some super secret thing only idiots like them know about. Dude. I read Shakespeare. Everyone has read goddamn Shakespeare. I don't need your high-handed righteousness to explain to me the joke you made about holding that goddamn skull in your hand because every-fricking-body knows what it means. I'm not a child. I'm probably older than you. I have a fucking 3.9 GPA in one of the top business schools in the world who travelled halfway across the goddamn globe by himself right after graduating from a Christian high school in an Islamic country with only a backpack with clothes inside to stay in your goddamn frigging ice cube of a country and my capability in my goddamn second language, English, is better than 95% of your whole goddamn population. I know what that stupid reference of yours is.
*breathe*
*breathe*
I feel a lot better now. Please ignore everything I said. If I held that in any longer, I would have exploded.