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[Nilocy]

Prior to a recent event in my life that was both extremely distressing and unbelievably saddening, my mind cast its infinite thinking power to the workings of someone who wants to commit suicide. It can be a cry for help when you have no voice left, it can be a life line that saves you in the long run, or it could be the end of it all. Who knows?

My question is, what drives someone to give their life up like this? I have serious problems trying to understand it from their point of view. I try to emphathise but quite frankly I can't. It sucks, cause this person really needs to feel cared for, and i feel as if I can't because I havn't experianced it.  Any advice?

This topic is suppoesed to stay in the utmost seriousness, so please no derailing.

[Jreengus]

I can't imagine ever committing suicide personally, the idea that I'll die one day is bad enough for me actually bringing it about early regardless of the circumstances is unthinkable.

Or to put it another way: "Who can fathom the mind of someone so desperate they can overcome their own survival instinct?"

[Jackrabbit]

Quite frankly, unless you're in that position, you can't honestly know what it's like. It'd be impossible to  empathize unless you are or ever have considered suicide. If someone you know is going to commit suicide or wants to (believe me, I know what that's like, a friend wanted to about six months ago) don't say 'I know how you feel'. Don't. Instead, convince them that suicide is the most permanent of solutions to a problem that they can overcome, either with your help or without as they so choose.

Man, I'm all sad now remembering. It scared the shit out of me, let me tell you, even if he didn't go through with it. Damn you.

[DJ]

Sometimes life just sucks, and it seems like things are only going to get worse. Is a miserable life worth living?

[TheNewerMartianEmperor]

I think that someone who commits suicide sees all their options besides it too painful to go through with, they see nothing that they can do to make things better, and they need an out.

[Jackrabbit]

Sometimes life just sucks, and it seems like things are only going to get worse. Is a miserable life worth living?

See, there's the problem. Can you cast your mind into the future and know that you'll be miserable forever? No. You have to find out, and you have to know that ending it all now contains pretty much the same risk that things will continue to be bad as it does staying alive, except if you stay alive you'll be more likely to work things out and just experience the best parts of life.

[Nilocy]

Yeah, I understand the 'I can't empathise with you'. But I've stopped them from doing it twice now. Its really quite saddening and super frustrating, I'm guessing for both them and me.

Sometimes life just sucks, and it seems like things are only going to get worse. Is a miserable life worth living?

I think the issue is is that they can't see the upside to anything atm. Its like their stuck in a, cliche, vicious cycle, i feel bad because everything else is bad because i feel bad, etc. etc.

[Jackrabbit]

Professional help is your best bet, believe me. Doing it on your own is only going to go so far.

[Nilocy]

Yeah, thats true, they did say they were going to see a councillor. But you know what people are like when they say they're going to the doctors...

[Jackrabbit]

Helped my friend.

[KaelGotDwarves]

As mentioned before, Suicide is a permanent solution to a non-permanent problem.

Regardless of how shitty you feel, you will in fact eventually feel better. Things change, for better and worse.

I used to struggle with depression. Hell, still do. But part of what keeps me going is the realization that I'm the one in charge of my life, even when the choices are bad, someone else has it worse.

And it's worth it to fight for them, the little guy, for my family and friends, for the girl I love, and ultimately for myself.

Traveling and meeting new people, seeing new places helped me quite a bit. It gave me perspective when I believed I already had a lot from analyzing my life, and I realized what I would miss out on if I decided to end things early.

At 23, I've now had 2 close friends and 4 other acquaintances I know choose to take their own lives. I do not judge, but I continue living.

You can't figure it out for them, Nilocy. At some point they'll have to stop wasting time trying to find the meaning of life and they'll have to give meaning to life instead.

[Muz]

Often, it's a cry for attention. Sometimes you just run out of cards to play, so you just try to burn all your cards and see if anyone cares. I think few actually do try and commit suicide.. it's just when nobody believes that they will that they do it. There are also some people who realize this and are complete dicks about it.. they bruise the poor guy's ego even more by telling them how suicide is for the weak, making fun of them. Counselors work wonders for these types of people, because they really want someone to talk to, but don't want a friend making fun of them forever.

But it's usually because you have expectations in life and just can't imagine not meeting them. Straight A student who fails a single subject. Someone who got dumped by the love of their life. Arrogant businessman who goes bankrupt. Innocent virgin who gets raped. Most of them are still young, have a secure plan in life, and just don't have any idea what to do with their lives if that plan fails. Best way to deal with them... just show that there's another way. That it's literally not the end of the world.

[chaoticag]

I think that someone who commits suicide sees all their options besides it too painful to go through with, they see nothing that they can do to make things better, and they need an out.

That about sums it up well, but at times they might suddenly go suicidal for seemingly no reason or they find life crushingly stressful, even though their options look good. In that case it might be a physiological problem like clinical depresion or bipolar disorder. My family seems to fall into that, and it looks like my turn might be coming up soonish (or at least within the next five years).

[KaelGotDwarves]

Heh, lucky you then 

I actually say that seriously because for me, onset of bipolar disorder hit at 14, and for most people I know depression hit them at the worst possible time (naturally)

Teenage years before college, after college getting a job, mid-life crisis/divorce with a kid...

In a way I think it's best I've dealt with it since then because god forbid I would have ever gotten divorced without having experienced depression before, I would probably jump off a mountain.

[bjlong]

Depression and suicide are really big problems. You can't just understand them by me talking about them.

The best way to understand it is this: you're in a hole. You can't get out. You're too tired to try climbing, and even if you tried, it'd just collapse and bury you a bit. Noone's coming for you. You're in a hole, and there is no way out. Noone to get mad at. Noone to cry with. Just a hole.

I've considered suicide before. Even depressed as I was, I think I said to myself, "Now, wait, this is stupid. Suicide would be the suckiest thing ever."