Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

[Jackrabbit]

I've... no idea what's going on.

Somebody explain it to me.

[ToonyMan]

I CALL THE REFEREE.

LET ME GET THE QUAD.  PENALTIES WILL BE ME RUNNING YOU OVER.

[Sensei]

I have an Air Force sword from WWII, which dull. I have a few shurikens also- they're quite dangerous. Plus I have light metal poles right at staff and half staff lengths (disused Ikea accessory). Yes, I know how to use those.

Normally I'd stop there, but since this is dwarf fortress: I have a metal garbage can out back (the cliched kind), and a bin full of planks that have rusty nails through them. I also have a huge computer that used to run win95 and a bunch of cinder blocks.

Back to hats! Perhaps we need something more fitting of a Daimyo/Shogun/whatever?*


*A Daimyo is a ruler of a province. Depending on the time period (it changed back and forth a few times) a Daimyo may be the highest position possible or a subordinate to the Shogun, who rules all provinces, though there was not always a shogun at all. Technically, a the title Diamyo would be appropriate to the ruler of an American state, but you don't seem to care.

[Duke 2.0]

 That might be difficult. I fed this thing guns and vehicles of many different types. I don't think using it's food on it as a weapon will work out well.

 Shitshitshit...

 I gave it bladed weapons and old melee weapons as snacks! Dammit!

[ToonyMan]

What about smores?  Surely the beast would be afraid of sweets.

[Cthulhu]

The winner isn't going to be a Daimyo, or Hatamoto, or a Seppuku, or whatever weeaboo words you throw at us.

The winner will be King of Texas.  That is the title.

[Duke 2.0]

 I think it did escape back when I was still grafting all the mutating Gila monsters together with radioactive superglue. It ate the dreams of a little kid. Sugarplums and it's kind are not something this thing fears.

 Oh damn, while making all the restrictions put forward in this thread I forgot to add a weakness.

[Sensei]

You need to load a firetruck with frosting, and spray the Gila monster with frosting!

If nothing else, it should stop the smell.

Ninja'd by Cthulu: Aqizzar said Shogun. Also, I don't think you want to be a Seppuku.

[Duke 2.0]

 Oh, hey guys. I found a safe-haven to think this through.

 http://www.ustream.tv/channel/live-fortress

[ToonyMan]

OK.  Let's see if we can find this thing with a 1d6 die.

5.

Sweet.  We found it, now what?

[Duke 2.0]

 I also fed it old RTD dice. That won't work.

[ToonyMan]

>put on sunglasses

[Aqizzar]

By the way, if you're coming to Texas, be on the on the lookout for Superdevil.

Dammit, why won't this stupid digital camera work.  I wanna show off my awesome Czarist cavalry officer's hat.

[Jackrabbit]

God damn but crap like that pisses me off. Still, whatever, I can't change it by whining.

[Sensei]

But you CAN change it by becoming King/Shogun/Czar/Minister/Emperor/Pope/Daimyo of Texas!

Okay, not really.