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Author Topic: TEJAS![Texas]  (Read 23989 times)

TheNewerMartianEmperor

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Re: TEJAS![Texas]
« Reply #360 on: August 19, 2009, 05:42:14 am »

My first edict as Emperor of Earth is to declare Saturday top-hat-and-monocle day!
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Once tried to conquer Earth, and succeeded! Too bad it got really, really boring, really, really fast.

One day, we shall all look back on this, and laugh. Sorry about the face, by the way, and the legs, and the eyes, and the arms. In fact, sorry 'bout the whole body.

Emperor_Jonathan

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Re: TEJAS![Texas]
« Reply #361 on: August 19, 2009, 05:45:01 am »

My first act as the Emperor of... You know, the general multiverse, would be to tell everyone to "be cool bro'."
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Jackrabbit

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Re: TEJAS![Texas]
« Reply #362 on: August 19, 2009, 06:14:39 am »

My first act as me will be to wear my fedora.

Fuck yeah.
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TheNewerMartianEmperor

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Re: TEJAS![Texas]
« Reply #363 on: August 19, 2009, 06:21:15 am »

I declare Wednesday to be fedora and bullwhips day!
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Once tried to conquer Earth, and succeeded! Too bad it got really, really boring, really, really fast.

One day, we shall all look back on this, and laugh. Sorry about the face, by the way, and the legs, and the eyes, and the arms. In fact, sorry 'bout the whole body.

Jackrabbit

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Re: TEJAS![Texas]
« Reply #364 on: August 19, 2009, 06:25:07 am »

Well, I don't have a bullwhip, but I could borrow one.
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Gunner-Chan

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Re: TEJAS![Texas]
« Reply #365 on: August 19, 2009, 06:26:07 am »

I declare monday random execution day! And the 15 of every month "Make Empress Sofia happy" day!
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Diamonds are combustable, because they are made of Carbon.

Aqizzar

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Re: TEJAS![Texas]
« Reply #366 on: August 19, 2009, 06:28:05 am »

And my first act as Emperor of the Inside of this Gila Monster will be to install more outlets.  Seriously, I'm just burning through battery power here.  Then I think I'll put in some tile flooring.
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And here is where my beef pops up like a looming awkward boner.
Please amplify your relaxed states.
Quote from: PTTG??
The ancients built these quote pyramids to forever store vast quantities of rage.

Jackrabbit

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Re: TEJAS![Texas]
« Reply #367 on: August 19, 2009, 06:28:31 am »

Way to make Sofia happy:

  • Execution
  • Hilarious Execution
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TheNewerMartianEmperor

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Re: TEJAS![Texas]
« Reply #368 on: August 19, 2009, 06:31:49 am »

Your emperor demands blood! BLOOD!
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Once tried to conquer Earth, and succeeded! Too bad it got really, really boring, really, really fast.

One day, we shall all look back on this, and laugh. Sorry about the face, by the way, and the legs, and the eyes, and the arms. In fact, sorry 'bout the whole body.

Gunner-Chan

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Re: TEJAS![Texas]
« Reply #369 on: August 19, 2009, 06:33:33 am »

Way to make Sofia happy:

  • Execution
  • Hilarious Execution

You forgot a few things.
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Diamonds are combustable, because they are made of Carbon.

JoshuaFH

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Re: TEJAS![Texas]
« Reply #370 on: August 19, 2009, 06:35:41 am »

Way to make Sofia happy:

  • Execution
  • Hilarious Execution

You didn't forget anything.

That seems better for my sanity.
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Jackrabbit

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Re: TEJAS![Texas]
« Reply #371 on: August 19, 2009, 06:37:28 am »

Way to make Sofia happy:

  • Execution
  • Hilarious Execution
  • Repeated Execution
  • Execution of people who don't deserve it and they're all like 'don't kill me, don't kill me!' but you do it anyway and you're all 'Screw you, I rule' and it's awesome

All I could think of.
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TheNewerMartianEmperor

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Re: TEJAS![Texas]
« Reply #372 on: August 19, 2009, 06:39:13 am »

A tip for sofia: Never watch the pit and the pendulum method of execution without something very strong shielding you.

You never know when someone will "accidentally" mess up the balancing and the strength of the chain, sending the blade right at you.
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Once tried to conquer Earth, and succeeded! Too bad it got really, really boring, really, really fast.

One day, we shall all look back on this, and laugh. Sorry about the face, by the way, and the legs, and the eyes, and the arms. In fact, sorry 'bout the whole body.

Gunner-Chan

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Re: TEJAS![Texas]
« Reply #373 on: August 19, 2009, 06:44:48 am »

That old method? I prefer more "hands on" methods, like strangling, or impaling, or disemboweling.

Hmm... Death by rape?
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Diamonds are combustable, because they are made of Carbon.

Jackrabbit

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Re: TEJAS![Texas]
« Reply #374 on: August 19, 2009, 06:45:32 am »

I move that we restrain all posts about what makes Sofia happy to new VN, lest Toady nuke us from space. And even Martians can't defend against that.
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