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Author Topic: Fat Dwarfs  (Read 16497 times)

Itnetlolor

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Re: Fat Dwarfs
« Reply #30 on: August 05, 2009, 10:22:41 pm »
Quote from: Vester on August 05, 2009, 05:45:08 am
Quote from: HAMMERMILL on August 05, 2009, 03:04:07 am
Ah man, I'm neurotic and possessive about my fortress already, now I got to make sure they are all thin and fit?

Anyways... I predict at least one DF player is going to get their entire fortress fat so they can make a soap industry from Dwarves.

It took 9 replies before it went somewhere horrific.

You gotta love Dwarf Fortress.

(Can you imagine an entire fortress built out of the rendered fat of dwarves?)  :-X
Olin Durden would have a field day with this.

Think of it; with all the materials in place, one can make BOMBS out of this stuff. Every dwarf would have a burn mark on their hands, and spar clubs would be formed all over the place.

The first rule of Spar Club: You do not talk about Spar Club.
The second rule of Spar Club: YOU DO NOT TALK ABOUT SPAR CLUB!
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Eduren

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Re: Fat Dwarfs
« Reply #31 on: August 05, 2009, 10:25:55 pm »
His name is Urist McAxedwarf.

His name is Urist McAxedwarf.
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Quote from: Vector on November 07, 2010, 12:21:30 pm
Quote from: ToonyMan on November 07, 2010, 11:44:09 am
I don't know.  Duke wants me to stop playing mafia.
That's the sign of an abusive boyfriend, Toony... you don't have to listen to him.

Hectonkhyres

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Re: Fat Dwarfs
« Reply #32 on: August 05, 2009, 11:00:20 pm »
Quote from: Itnetlolor on August 05, 2009, 10:22:41 pm
The first rule of Spar Club: You do not talk about Spar Club.
The second rule of Spar Club: YOU DO NOT TALK ABOUT SPAR CLUB!
The third rule is, if you bring candy, you have to bring enough to share.
You didn't bring enough, did you? Did you?
...
*adamantine-axe training accident*
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Quote from: Volfram on April 30, 2009, 09:12:59 am
And now the thread is about starfish porn.
Quote from: Dante on September 21, 2009, 04:20:48 pm
...originally read that as 'perpetual motion pants' and thought how could I have missed this??

Vester

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Re: Fat Dwarfs
« Reply #33 on: August 05, 2009, 11:16:55 pm »
Quote from: Hectonkhyres on August 05, 2009, 11:00:20 pm
Quote from: Itnetlolor on August 05, 2009, 10:22:41 pm
The first rule of Spar Club: You do not talk about Spar Club.
The second rule of Spar Club: YOU DO NOT TALK ABOUT SPAR CLUB!
The third rule is, if you bring candy, you have to bring enough to share.
You didn't bring enough, did you? Did you?
...
*adamantine-axe training accident*

Urist McAxelord has reveled in slaughter lately.
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"Land of song," said the warrior bard, "though all the world betray thee - one sword at least thy rights shall guard; one faithful harp shall praise thee."

Keilden

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Re: Fat Dwarfs
« Reply #34 on: August 06, 2009, 12:40:14 am »
Pressure plates that go after weight can be used to keep the fat dwarfs out of the food stockpile:)
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The Endcat will end you and everything you love.

Shima

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Re: Fat Dwarfs
« Reply #35 on: August 06, 2009, 12:45:27 am »
What I wonder is, will these kinds of changes affect non-Dwarves?  Will the King of Goblins be an Ahnold style Terminator of muscles, or perhaps some hyper-skinny waif, or even a right proper ball of lard, like all good kings?
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(giant worm leather coat)
Weight: 718238Γ
Owner: Udil Evonudil, Planter

Quote from: zchris13 on May 30, 2009, 06:24:06 pm
Oh Armok, the spice.

Keilden

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Re: Fat Dwarfs
« Reply #36 on: August 06, 2009, 12:47:15 am »
Everyone will be affected by this new body system, so you could find a really fat cat.
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The Endcat will end you and everything you love.

Hectonkhyres

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Re: Fat Dwarfs
« Reply #37 on: August 06, 2009, 01:03:53 am »
Quote from: Keilden on August 06, 2009, 12:47:15 am
Everyone will be affected by this new body system, so you could find a really fat cat.
I will attach said lardiferous blobcat to a chain and swing it at my enemies.
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Quote from: Volfram on April 30, 2009, 09:12:59 am
And now the thread is about starfish porn.
Quote from: Dante on September 21, 2009, 04:20:48 pm
...originally read that as 'perpetual motion pants' and thought how could I have missed this??

TheNewerMartianEmperor

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Re: Fat Dwarfs
« Reply #38 on: August 06, 2009, 04:04:05 am »
I bet the first bug that comes out of this will be a spherical bronze colossus. That is going to be damn-near impossible to fight.
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Once tried to conquer Earth, and succeeded! Too bad it got really, really boring, really, really fast.

One day, we shall all look back on this, and laugh. Sorry about the face, by the way, and the legs, and the eyes, and the arms. In fact, sorry 'bout the whole body.

Vester

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Re: Fat Dwarfs
« Reply #39 on: August 06, 2009, 04:07:50 am »
Quote from: Shima on August 06, 2009, 12:45:27 am
What I wonder is, will these kinds of changes affect non-Dwarves?  Will the King of Goblins be an Ahnold style Terminator of muscles, or perhaps some hyper-skinny waif, or even a right proper ball of lard, like all good kings?

Goblin Kings (who are not always goblins) are responsible for almost all of my recruit deaths, thanks to their love of crossbows. These are kings who go out and personally wreck your face.

Compare them to dwarf kings, who basically sit at home and make demands.

Gobbo kings'd better look like Ahnold! (Although being fat would probably give you more protection against blunt attacks?)
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"Land of song," said the warrior bard, "though all the world betray thee - one sword at least thy rights shall guard; one faithful harp shall praise thee."

Rowanas

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Re: Fat Dwarfs
« Reply #40 on: August 06, 2009, 04:51:55 am »
Now I'm picturing an epic battle cosisting of three goblin kings attacking my fort. One is an Arnie remake, one is an MJ clone, and the last one looks like Kingpin.
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Quote from: Dutchling on April 14, 2012, 02:28:14 pm
I agree with Urist. Steampunk is like Darth Vader winning Holland's Next Top Model. It would be awesome but not something I'd like in this game.
Quote from: Bumber on November 27, 2018, 01:05:30 am
Unfortunately dying involves the amputation of the entire body from the dwarf.

BigFatDwarf

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Re: Fat Dwarfs
« Reply #41 on: August 06, 2009, 03:39:26 pm »
I wonder what will happen to elves ...

DF: The first game with obese Elves and Schwarzenegger Goblins.
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Quote from: James.Denholm on July 24, 2010, 08:41:14 am
Quote from: Thief^ on July 24, 2010, 04:39:15 am
I loaded up my save in the new version, spent a minute trying to find my archery range before figuring it was the room with Xs down both sides: bins of ammo and archery targets.
Urist McCrossbower cancells practice crossbowery: Unsure of which end of the room to shoot at.

Thndr

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Re: Fat Dwarfs
« Reply #42 on: August 06, 2009, 05:24:34 pm »
Quote from: Vester on August 05, 2009, 05:45:08 am
Quote from: HAMMERMILL on August 05, 2009, 03:04:07 am
Ah man, I'm neurotic and possessive about my fortress already, now I got to make sure they are all thin and fit?

Anyways... I predict at least one DF player is going to get their entire fortress fat so they can make a soap industry from Dwarves.

It took 9 replies before it went somewhere horrific.

You gotta love Dwarf Fortress.

(Can you imagine an entire fortress built out of the rendered fat of dwarves?)  :-X
Can you build an entire fortress out of the rendered fat of anything yet? If so I think I found a new challenge.
Lard Fortress.

Note: I never use soapmakers for well... Soap. So I have no clue what they're capable of.
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Rowanas

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Re: Fat Dwarfs
« Reply #43 on: August 06, 2009, 08:57:03 pm »
Soapmakers? Oh! You mean prospective disembowelment reaction technicians.
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Quote from: Dutchling on April 14, 2012, 02:28:14 pm
I agree with Urist. Steampunk is like Darth Vader winning Holland's Next Top Model. It would be awesome but not something I'd like in this game.
Quote from: Bumber on November 27, 2018, 01:05:30 am
Unfortunately dying involves the amputation of the entire body from the dwarf.

Vester

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Re: Fat Dwarfs
« Reply #44 on: August 06, 2009, 11:01:03 pm »
Quote from: Thndr on August 06, 2009, 05:24:34 pm
Quote from: Vester on August 05, 2009, 05:45:08 am
Quote from: HAMMERMILL on August 05, 2009, 03:04:07 am
Ah man, I'm neurotic and possessive about my fortress already, now I got to make sure they are all thin and fit?

Anyways... I predict at least one DF player is going to get their entire fortress fat so they can make a soap industry from Dwarves.

It took 9 replies before it went somewhere horrific.

You gotta love Dwarf Fortress.

(Can you imagine an entire fortress built out of the rendered fat of dwarves?)  :-X
Can you build an entire fortress out of the rendered fat of anything yet? If so I think I found a new challenge.
Lard Fortress.

Note: I never use soapmakers for well... Soap. So I have no clue what they're capable of.

Well, you could build buildings out of charcoal, too.

Lard Fortress: it's fat-riffic!
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Quote
"Land of song," said the warrior bard, "though all the world betray thee - one sword at least thy rights shall guard; one faithful harp shall praise thee."
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