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Author Topic: a story i thought of...  (Read 695 times)

twwolfe

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a story i thought of...
« on: August 04, 2009, 10:31:32 pm »

so, one night i had a DFish dream.

basically, it will revolve around a human's quest to find the demon lord who cursed him with immortality back in the age of myth. thing is, this immortallity basically takes a form of lichdom. in order to maintain his human appearance, he must periodically drain the souls of sentient beings.however, his right hand will stay skeletal, so he wears a glove to cover it. he figures if he can get the demon lord to release him, he'll go back to being a normal human. throughout his journey, he will visit many famous dwarven cities, like Boatmurdered and such.

in the final days, he will come to the "Dwarf heaven" city, or what remains of it, as the dwarves were wiped out in battle with the demon hordes from said sites HFS.
before the dwarves perished, they rescued the humans and elven prisoners, set them up in a small cave city around the Bottomless pit, then bricked themselves in to save the rest of the world. over time these survivors would become known as the "outcasts" since no society would take them in because of thier demonic taint. over time, a human town sprang up in the valley below them, and things have been growing towards full-scale war.

when our hero arrives, he finds an outcast girl trapped in a tree by hungry cave crocodiles. By a combination of magic accumulated over his centuries of existence and sheer dumb luck, he rescues her. Not wanting her to know the truth about him, he claims all of his powers come from magic items he has. he then tells that he is a treasure hunter, and heard the dwarves had many treasures. she guides him to the bricked up tunnel, which is starting to fall apart. then together they venture in. carefully avoiding the dwarvish traps that are still fuly functional. after much dungeon crawling, they enter the great throne room, where they meet the demon lord. one titanic battle later, including the destruction of a mountain, the eruption of the magma pipe, and the resurection of a good number of the long dead dwarves, the demon lord is defeated. our hero is granted one request.

now he is torn. on the one hand he wants his mortality and a normal human life back. on the other hand, he has come to care for the outcasts, and more particularly, the girl. after a bit of though, he figures out a solution, and simply requests that all of the demons victims be returned to normal.


what do you think?
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RandomNumberGenerator

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Re: a story i thought of...
« Reply #1 on: August 04, 2009, 11:52:08 pm »

So everyone lives happily ever after? Hmm... It's an interesting idea,, but I'm a rather large fan of dark fantasy, and having an ending such as the way you described it doesn't suit my tastes. I do like the idea of the cursed immortality though.
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Vester

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Re: a story i thought of...
« Reply #2 on: August 04, 2009, 11:58:32 pm »

A surprising lack of grimdark! Well, it's post-apocalyptic enough.

It's a great idea. Although if you think about it, the famous dwarven cities can't possibly exist all in the same world. The way I always thought of worldgen was that each world generated was basically another version of the Original World . In other words, Boatmurdered exists in one universe, Nist Akath in another, Headshoots in yet another. Some worlds have different races (orcs and such) and in other worlds the megabeasts won the war with civilization (all the horror stories from the modding threads about megabeasts wiping out all life). If your human cursed with immortality were to visit all the famous dwarf cities, then he would have to be a kind of dimension-hopper like Roland from the Dark Tower.

Which is kinda cool.
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twwolfe

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Re: a story i thought of...
« Reply #3 on: August 05, 2009, 12:55:46 am »

A surprising lack of grimdark! Well, it's post-apocalyptic enough.

It's a great idea. Although if you think about it, the famous dwarven cities can't possibly exist all in the same world. The way I always thought of worldgen was that each world generated was basically another version of the Original World . In other words, Boatmurdered exists in one universe, Nist Akath in another, Headshoots in yet another. Some worlds have different races (orcs and such) and in other worlds the megabeasts won the war with civilization (all the horror stories from the modding threads about megabeasts wiping out all life). If your human cursed with immortality were to visit all the famous dwarf cities, then he would have to be a kind of dimension-hopper like Roland from the Dark Tower.

Which is kinda cool.

i always figured they would be on different continents, but that could work as well. evil dimensional traveling demons screwing with non demon races and such
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twwolfe

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Re: a story i thought of...
« Reply #4 on: August 05, 2009, 01:04:26 am »

So everyone lives happily ever after? Hmm... It's an interesting idea,, but I'm a rather large fan of dark fantasy, and having an ending such as the way you described it doesn't suit my tastes. I do like the idea of the cursed immortality though.

well, that isn't the ending of the entire story, per se, more like the ending of a part of it.

when the two come out, they find that the human villagers are very pissed off at having mountains erupt around them. Also, the wish removed the "taint" from the outcasts but not the prejudice. So his good intentioned request to better everyones lot gets nothing but his own mortality back. and it turns out immortality would be really helpful as the humans finally decide to start their genocidal war on the outcasts that they've been threatening to do for so long. in essence, it's his fault that they're dying, since if he hadn't come, it would have stayed the same old passive persecution.

and it wasn't the fact that he had to drain people to live that bothered him. it was more the knowledge that he would have to watch his freinds grow old and die around him. Kind of like Drizzt Do'urden in the latest books.
« Last Edit: August 05, 2009, 01:08:20 am by twwolfe »
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Vester

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Re: a story i thought of...
« Reply #5 on: August 05, 2009, 01:11:53 am »

I can think of another source of conflict.

What if they find out he's a soul-draining "monster"?

How do they react?
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Beanchubbs

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Re: a story i thought of...
« Reply #6 on: August 05, 2009, 03:08:23 am »

Another source of conflict:
What if he loses to the demon and him and the rest of the outcasts are banished to some far away land forever. And then, since he is still immortal, he'd have to feed and he'd eat the girl.

What kind of reactions would he get?  ;D
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