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[Phantom]

Create a trap, find a severed hand for trap, put trap on wall where most nobles go by, some how find a way to conceal self, trap is triggered on a pressure plate, which sends the hand hitting the nobles face.
THERE A PLAN AND HOW IT WORKS.
Second Plan: Crossbows don't have enough FIYAH, Items needed:               * MUST BE AIRTIGHT *
-A log to make into a rifle body about the length of a two handed sword.
-A bag with a hole for the rifles butt area,the area will have a hole, and a tube to secure bags hole with the hole in the area,a plug is needed for the tube.
-There is a small cavity,for cartridges.
-A hole will be made for main bag opening,heading toward the metal barrel inside the rifle body,the hole and opening shall need a tube.
-A covering to make the barrel stay in place.
-A switch connected near the hole connected with Bag Opening
-The *gas* of a creature,preferably an elephant, to be put into bag.
- For it to work the switch shall be used,creating a small explosion due to gas,which will propel the ammo out of the rifle.

[Armok]

((you people are missing the purpose of this thread, it's NOT as simple as saying "build that" or "invent this", you have to actually specify HOW TO DO IT, as in a real invention.YOU have ro invent a reasonable way to do what you want to do, it's not an abstracted skill system.))

[zchris13]

So epic. But sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo sleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeepppppppppy.

THIS IS THE WAY THE INTERNET WAS MEANT TO BE PLAYED. SLEEPY RAGE!!!!

[Armok]

((well, I should go to bed anyway, and due to the nature of this the dwarf will not die, nor will any players be able to mess up each others work, for THAT EXACT REASON: so people wont feel any time press or need to stay up late in order to play this game.))

[zchris13]

Now dudes, that's just mean. Don't be mean. Don't even post if it's not constructive.

Alright...

So the first thing we need is a couple of mechanisms.  How many mechanisms do we have lying around?

[Armok]

((I'm Clicking the report to moderator button on EJ once i finish writing this post.))

IC: You dont have any mechanism curently laying around, but you are nerby your workshop, and there are plenty of rocks lying around, and whit your skill making some take only a few seconds.

(please note that while the insane quality and speed of making mechanisms do apply, they are not the magical do-anything devices of DF, you have to spesify what they are going to do, and if they are complicated/new also how thay are going to do it. For example, creating a timed clock-like mechanism or a single logic gate is fairly obvius, as is spesific DF aplication like "lift floodgate" or "mele weapon trap" or a lever. A babbage machine, on the other hand, would reuire a bunch of explanations, many mechanisms, etc. Really, what is "obvius" will be determined on a case-to-case basis.
For example, an automatic noble-slapping device would probably require something to slap them whit, a weapon-trap-like mechanism to weld that object, mechanism for moving around and finding nobles, etc. And what type of solution you chose for each of these subsystems will affect the end result.)

[WorkerDrone]

Words.

In other words. He actually wants me to make a constructive post.

I...can't even contemplate how I could go about such a task. Why its been so long!

[qwertyuiopas]

Wait!

First you must upgrade your workshop with automatic drawers!

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

The drawer is held closed or opened  by the latched, pictured in first diagram. These are linked to a button for each drawer, and are the only control method.

Underneath each drawer is a steam-based toggle, that toggles once the drawer has fully extended/retracted.

The steam source and piston(or equivalent) are not included in the diagram.

The "used" steam vents through a vent pipe(also not drawn) out through the roof/wall into a nearby noble's bedroom.

[Armok]

You upgrade your workshop, making pipes and airtight vents like that out of only rock would have been really hard if you were not legendary. Now you only need a source of steam to hook it up to and it's operable.
>_

[forsaken1111]

An automated noble-slapper eh?

Alright, we take some stone, Microcline for the sheer eyesoreness(yay new word) of it, and make it into a long articulated arm capable of making a slapping motion. It will be moved by an overcomplicated very dwarfy set of gears and belts. Of course we don't have any belts to put on it yet, but we can at least make the stone mechanism which will do the slappin.

Anyone have a suggestion where we'll get some leather for the belts?

[Rose]

route a river near enough to a noble's bedroom to act as a power source, but far enough that the noble doesn't think we want to *gasp* flood his room.

[filiusenox]

(Insert dwarf name here) Steelgear has went into a fell mood.

Sorry couldnt resist.

[forsaken1111]

Excellent idea, We could tap that river with a waterwheel to provide power to the noble slapper! and it would give us a handy source of water for steam.

[Armok]

You take some microline and make an articulated arm. It turns out fairly well, just in need of some leather belts, a power source, and something slappy at the end.
You think of using a river as a powersource, but the fortress layout dosn't allow for re-routing the river to either the nobles quarters nor your workshop, besides, such a large problem is probably outside even your authority.
>_

[forsaken1111]

You take some microline and make an articulated arm. It turns out fairly well, just in need of some leather belts, a power source, and something slappy at the end.
You think of using a river as a powersource, but the fortress layout dosn't allow for re-routing the river to either the nobles quarters nor your workshop, besides, such a large problem is probably outside even your authority.
>_

Derp derp. Okay, we need to get creative here.

First, go snatch up Mr. Scruffles... that f-king cat always leaves dead rats and spiders in the workshop. Take him down to the butcher/tannery and make some leather strips out of his hide. That will serve well enough for belts.

Would the fortress layout allow for a windmill up on the surface with a vertical axle and gear assembly to provide power to the arm when we activate it?