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[cerapa]

Jokes

These are the best DF jokes I have heard.

[Ikaruga]

Urist McDiplomat has arrived to your fort.

He demands :
- lands
- water

Urist McLeader designs new location to get lands and water : bottomless pit

Urist McDiplomat has been angry lately. He wishes Urist McLeader was a better conversationalist.

Urist McLeader has been angry lately. He wishes Urist McDiplomat was a better conversationalist too.

Urist McLeader hits air in front of Urist McDiplomat in its emptiness with its *Obsidian Sword*. It is unarmed.

Urist McDiplomat says : Urist McLeader has gone into a tantrum !

Urist McLeader says : Tantrum ?

Urist McLeader enters in a martial trance.

Urist McLeader says : THIS. IS. BOATMURDEEEEEEEEERED !

Urist McLeader hits Urist McDiplomat in the balls with his right foot. It is bruised.

Urist McDiplomat is blown away. Urist Mc Diplomat falls into bottomless pit. Urist Mc Diplomat collapses in a lump of gore.

Urist McDiplomat has been struck down.

[Von Krieger]

Hastily make mugs from rock to trade with potential elven caravan.

And then steal the elf's pants.

[Areyar]

This is a typed interpretation of a masterful rendition of an elven sown image in rope reed.
In the image are a dwarf and a tree. The dwarf is performing a depraved act on the tree. The tree is making a rude gesture.

This image refers to the felling of the birch tree 'Brackencuddles' at the fortress of 'Rawknuckles' in the year 80.

[Rowanas]

An Elf walks into a pub and clears his voice to the crowd of dwarven drinkers. He says, "I hear you dwarves are a bunch of hard drinkers. I'll give 500 dwarfpounds to anybody in here who can drink 10 barrels of dwarven beer back-to-back."

The room is quiet, and no one takes up the elf's offer. One dwarf even leaves.

Thirty minutes later the same dwarf who left shows back up and taps the elf on the back. "Is your bet still good?" asks the dwarf.

The elf says yes and asks the pub keep to line up 10 barrels of dwarven beer. Immediately the dwarf tears into all 10 of the barrels, drinking them all back-to-back.

The other pub patrons cheer as the elf sits in amazement. The elf gives the dwarf the 500 dwarfpounds and says, "If you don't mind me asking, where did you go for that 30 minutes you were gone?"

The dwarf replies, "Oh... I had to go to the pub down the street to see if I could do it first."

[Volfram]

Jokes

These are the best DF jokes I have heard.

The first was originally about (some variant of) a Frenchman, a Brit, and an Irishman(there may be a Scott in there, depending on who tells the joke.)

I don't recognize the other, but I was expecting spores to come into play.


If your meal doesn't involve magma, IT'S NOT MANLY DWARVEN ENOUGH!.

[Drakis]

why has there been no updates in 3 days?   this makes me sad.     i have no jokes to contribute to join in the game, but i am enjoying watching the game go on.

[Rowanas]

I did wonder. I thought Deon had collected everything so he had buggered off. Also, every time I see his name it reminds me of my dad, also called Deon.

[Deon]

I did not wander off. I am at work all these days because I have maintaince troubles with ISP at home, today is 1st of August so maintance works should end and I will be able to continue. I want to find out what happens to this little guy too,

P.S. Yeah internetz are working. Now I can draw

[buman]

For this you should tell a dwarfy joke or anecdote.

Thats no moon.... thats an atom smasher!

[Thursday Postal]

I kind of want to join but it seems enough people are in. I'll just watch the nice little pictures and read the 'story.'

[Deon]

Yeah the people gave me some work to do. I'll probably finish it this night when I become more sober after a friend's party.

I was kind of carried away because I've bought a new tablet and now I can draw nude girls in details . Sorry guys, I won't leave you.

[Rowanas]

Damn you. the only person I've ever personally known who can draw good hentai is my sister, and I'm sure as hell not asking her...

[ousire]

allrighty! i think i have to join this here. my entry joke:

Urist mcdwarf1: remember buddy: magma can solve all yer problems
Urist mcdwarf2: what if the problem is a magma flood?
Urist mcdwarf1: .....
Urist mcdwarf2: or what about fire imps? arnt those immune to magm-
*urist mcdwarf2 has been struck down!*


the moral of the story? quite simply: magma solves everything! well, except fire i-
*Ousire has been struck down!*

[Bloogonis]

people stop joinging, and let the picture continue.

also

Likot Mcbad-mother cancels forge item in magma forge: seeking infant
The Baby Urist Mcgaga has burned to death