zchris13 - Entangle Massive Object.(2+1) You stick your thumb in the ground. A single vine entangles the skelephant's right tusk.
tehstefan - Shoot them again! Naows! (3) You
nearly hit them.
Jack_Bread - USE MAH KNIVES AS NEEDLES AND FIX UP HER CLOTHING COMBATTATLY. (2) You leap forward! The medic leaps back!
Eagle - Heal up the soldiers with the power of Banjo. Then advance down the path, cautious of any more ambushes/artillery strikes.
ROW ROW FIGHT THE POWAH (5) You call upon the power of Banjo to heal your grunts. Some minor wounds disappear. You then try to order your soldiers, but Nobby doesn't move. Pssh.
So you leave your personal guard behind and advance with the cannon fodder.
A helpful sign points out civilization is just a turn's travel away.
Dies-Horribly - Hey! That's my card! But do it anyway. In the left slot. But examine it first, and Urist McArgleBargle.
And lather face with tasty cream.(6) With a dramatic gesture, you EXAMINIFY the card. The text reads:
"Semisuicidal autonomous lasercraft. Will lock on to a foe and barrage them with FoS's, Votes and Homing Lasers until it dies. Then, it will try to lock on to another target, which usually takes a while."
Attached is a list of successful and unsuccessful usages. You don't even bother. You just place the card on the field.
UristMcArglebargle's description consists of a simple sentence: "Did You Just Eat Cthulhu?"
You see no need to place it down, and instead draw your obligatory cards.
(6) Lightning Grid
(2) Folding Chair
(5) You then courageously wipe the cream off Gutsman's ass, lather your face with it and pull out your trusty shaving knife, to be used for... AWESOME SHAVING!
Barkeep - HOMING LASEEEER(1) The cane sizzles and dies down. Barkeep is not amused.
Medic - Go for the BOMB ARROWS!(1) It falls about ten feet short.
If you strap explosives to an arrow, it will be heavier. Duh.
Squad Grunts - Follow sarge.(4) They follow.
Squad Guards - Guard sarge.(2) They try to get Nobby to follow instead, without success.
Squad Nobby - Scribble! SCRIBBLE!(1) He finds his notebook - and then accidentially triggers the flamethrower. It is incinerated!
- num 5A helpful notice tells you that
has summoned a sub-sub-CO, Hyperactive Boxing Kitten.
Dog - UNLEASH.(2) The dog does not see a tree, therefore, no dice.
Rabid Moles - Decide on faceclawing.(6) They charge you, one taking the other piggyback. The 'rider' holds a big stick. The sight is too terrifying.
You have a deja-vu of the worst sort.
Steampunk Skelephant - TUSKES(2) The one vine is strong enough to keep the skelephant in place.
Suddenly, a FREAKIN' LASER vaporizes the skelephant. It came from that other monolith.
Statuses
The Game.
Hand of Dies-Horribly: Giant Enemy Bomber, Get out of jail free card, UristMcArglebargle, Folding Chair, Lightning Grid
Life vial of Dies-Horribly: 10/10
Played cards of Dies-Horribly: Ass Card (Left Red), Night of the Steampunk Zombies (Center Red), Longcat Flail&Kitten Geysir (Delay, 2 remaining), DDoS Carpet Bombing (Left Flank), HomingToonyTunnelLaserCraft3000 (Left), Vindovs Vista - Dracula Edition (Right Flank)
's hand:
??
's Life Vial: 10/10
's played cards: Redshirt Army, Rotating Laser Cannons, Princess Tenko, Hyperactive Boxing Kitten, Gutsman's Ass + Can of Shaving Cream + Jam Flavoring,
Zchris13
Status: On weird, green meadow. One with the vines. Highly energized. Leader of the party. Donkey ears.
Skills: Adventurer Work Ethic
Equipment: Rose flower hat (unremovable), Pair of strange goggles.
Inventory: Imaginary roll of duct tape, 200 gold, Soft cushions, tea set
Jack_Bread
Status: Headache. Bruise on head. ROCK DRILL FINGER!.
Skills: Adventurer Work Ethic, Trippin' Master, Improptu Tailor, Can breathe in space.
Equipment: Two dolled-up knives, Black Fingerless Gloves
Inventory: Fainted Metapod named Goo, 200 gold, Paperclip
'Scarface' tehstefan
Status: Minor hangover. Haphazard shave. In matrix. Hole in leg. Bleeding.
Skills: Firephobia. Basic idea of Archery. Good VS. inanimate, defenseless objects (+1)
Equipment: Sword-chucks with dulled hilts. Five cm layer of dust.
Inventory: Shortbow, 300 gold.
Eagle
Status: Apparently fire immune. -100 gp to destructive magic cost! Knows (NUCLEAR) telekinesis. And is excessive about it.
Bandaid on leg.
The goddamn CLOAK FULL OF STARS. Officer's uniform. Leads confused army of eight to the east.
Skills: Spellcasting
Equipment: Gnarled, singed staff. xMojotastic Hairbandx.
Inventory: Several incense sticks. 300 gold.
Banjo hand puppet.
Dies-Horribly
Status: Doomed. Big bruise on chest. Face very much harmed but lathered with jam-flavored shaving cream. Major hangover.
Skills: Nope.
Equipment: SHAAAVING KNIFE.
Inventory: 100 gold. 1 'Get a weapon for free' coupon. Two detached right hands. Brick labeled 'HANG' with curd smeared to its bottom. Walkie-talkie.
Medic
Status: Furious. Like, real furious.
Skills: Expert Medic, Sharpshooter. Final Boss skillz? Can breathe in space.
Equipment: Ruined violet and red clothing. Longbow. Quiver of +1 Arrows. Silver scalpel.
Inventory: Various poisons and explosives.
Barkeep
Status: Defensive position. Green stuff in face.
Skills: Something awesome probably. Can breathe in space.
Equipment: Formal wear. Spare cloak. (Sizzled) Laser cane. Small object.
Dog
Status: Woof? Belly problems?
Skills: "Leeroy Jenkins", "Spaced Out Man" and "Gastrointestinal Nuke"
Mima
Status: In the shadows, cackling madly.
Skills: Black Magic, Ghostness.
Equipment: Green-violet ensemble, wizard's hat
Army of Eight
Grunt Squad
Club: Robby - minor gash on left arm
Halberd 1: Johnny - poked out left eye
Halberd 2: Tommy - seriously hurt right arm
Sword 1: Sammy - no injuries
Sword 2: Bobby - no injuries
Guard Squad
Katana 1: Magnus von Magnusson
Katana 2: Max Fightmaster
Nobby Squad
Crossbow 1, Crossbow 2, Flamethrower: Demolitions Expert Nobby
In No-Formation
AMBUSHERS
Can Knight 1, 2
Running for the hills, and calling in reinforcements.
Rabid Mole 1, 3
Piggyback CHAAARGE!
Steampunk Skelephant
Laser'd.
Author
Topic: Boss Rush RtD - MSPA Intermission. (T27/Psyche) (Read 72446 times)