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[MagmaDeath]

Hah. Throwing orphans in the furnace is the most fun that can be.
And I am Frog, so yeah.
Walked off, turned on the furnace, chucked you in.

[Josephus]

BAHAHA what the hell Kagus. Also Frog is a little crazy, which is par for the course for the players.

EDIT: Ninja'd, apparently by the man himself!

Congrats on owning that dude. Who runs KING, anyway? And who was it that attacked you/spammed nanites?

I think King is run by GOKU. Vampire guy.

[Sir Pseudonymous]

Goku runs HIVE. Jayde and Rockerfella are listed as the holders of KING in who.


And I wouldn't call it a victory; as soon as Jayde (I think it was) showed up I ran off, barely escaping alive. It was still awesome though. It was Episode who was harassing me, and bitching about having his cocoon camped, and Lloyd who spammed nanites on him in the final battle before Jayde and co. showed up and we fled.

Less awesome was what happened later that night on my to-eventually-be-an-abom alt, though it followed so much awesome that it all kind of evens out. I first discovered that my 4.5K xp alt could take on charnold, and not just take him on, but take him on in berserk mode for the sole purpose of grinding fists, without taking more than one or two points of damage over a five to ten minute fight (thanks to the to-hit penalty berserk gives, of course; fighting him in cautious and using powerattacks takes about 30 seconds, if that). Sadly, after spending two hours wandering back and forth in the sewers grinding up fists, someone's chudscrub griefer alt ambushed me while I was fighting a chobo, leaving me outnumbered five to one, and while the fight was going strongly in my favor, in the span of about ten seconds every one of minions landed a heavy hit on me, taking me from full health to nothing, and costing me around 60 fists ip, taking me down from ~5.90. D:

Needless to say, after I retrieved my gear and drank the hellfire goo to get maximum horny for the brawn buff, I bought a lantern, went down to the sewers, and tracked him down so I could kill him on my terms. Sadly, his gear was worthless, as you'd expect of a griefer alt... :/

So uh... yeah... If you run into Clasher in the sewers, either get the fuck out or preemptively kill him if you can, if you don't want to be ambushed...

[Kagus]

Well, finally made my way out of the orphanage and into the great big world.  Hacked down that mean ol' nasty pervert in the museum, butchered him, and then proceeded through the arduous process of figuring out what in the samhill to do about the character generation process.

Note:

Code: [Select]

>_insult davey
Kyrgyz says, "your best friend Davey?  HA!  More like your best friend FAG-vey!"
Davey says, "Huh?"
>_hug davey
With that all taken care of, I am now bumbling about the streets with very little purpose other than treating the random people who wander into the area around Princeton general and molesting the poor nurse who works in the free clinic.  The name's Kyrgyz, should anyone not have picked up on that yet.  I've got some shirts, pants, and the nurse's dress should anyone require clothing.  Also, loads of Allomycin (ten doses per hypo?  Awesome!  But...  Shouldn't I clean it between uses or something?) and some other medical supplies occasionally.  I'm really only qualified to work on the NPCs at this point though, what with my current skill level.  Them and the naked girl I found wandering the streets covered in muck after taken a quick dip in the sewers.  I escorted her to the hospital shower as well, for good measure.

Much later, I found myself back at Meds 4 Less to restock on some supplies.  There I ran into a young girl wearing a jacket and skirt, and clutching onto a sign post and a pair of panties while she slept in a corner.  In my expert diagnoses, I found her to be afflicted with a raging case of gonorrhea.  I started trying to jam needles into her, but something wasn't working (I found out later that she needed to allow medical treatment, even while logged off).

While I was hunched over the prone lass, a man in a business suit staggered into the shop spouting "Duhhh buuuhhhhhr!".  He was obviously quite fabulously drunk.

He then purchased three rad detox kits from the wellbot, chugged a couple cans of soda, jammed a detox kit into his arm, and promptly wet his pants.

While the drunk, irradiated, caffeinated man pissed his pants and the WellBot shouted "Urinary fluids detected!" and hurriedly mopped up after him, I received a message.

Code: [Select]

From your wristpad: Psiwyrm pages, 'hey, looking for a corp?'

Let's observe the situation.  A man in a suit is staggering about, downing sodas by the can, shoving tubes and needles into his arm, and periodically fouling his clothes while a robot clucks and zips about between his legs, wiping up the trickles that hit the floor.

The man, too drunk to speak, then jams a pager message into his wristpad and sends it to the other man in the room, a scrawny boy wearing overalls and a pair of gloves who is crouching down next to a half-naked girl and failing miserably in his attempts to shove needles into the sleeping skin.  That message is an invitation to join the suit's corporation.

The phrase "I wouldn't join a group that would have me as a member" comes to mind.


We chatted for a bit, texting each other from across the room (pages are easier to read than speech...), and I said I would consider it, but that I wasn't ready to join up with anyone just yet.  He informed me that since I could actually type, I would be offered a managerial position should I join.  He congratulated me on my use of the word "Dubious", claiming it was proof I should join their corp.  The fact that he spelled it "Dubiouse" when he commented on it was mildly hilarious.

Shortly thereafter, I heard Frog commenting on chatnet about how TLE (the corp I was offered a spot in) would take in anybody, including some apparently distasteful individual known as "Scrub".


I went back to the hospital to take more clothes off the nurse and fall asleep on Wilson's desk.  Cheers.

[inaluct]

He then purchased three rad detox kits from the wellbot, chugged a couple cans of soda, jammed a detox kit into his arm, and promptly wet his pants.

WELCOME TO HELLMOO

[Kagus]

And now I've got a formal invitation to OLW.  This time from a naked man running around in the street with two whips.

Trying to illustrate my feelings toward corporations in a few lines of chat is somewhat difficult...  Especially for people who have no concept of not wanting to be in a corp.

[MagmaDeath]

And now I've got a formal invitation to OLW.  This time from a naked man running around in the street with two whips.

Trying to illustrate my feelings toward corporations in a few lines of chat is somewhat difficult...  Especially for people who have no concept of not wanting to be in a corp.

Well, that's because being in a corp has many benefits.
Make your own corp, and they wont bother you about it.

Also, Benaron is hilarious.
He runs around and tries to kill me, because I stole his whips, fails most of the time, then gets sent to jail.

[Sir Pseudonymous]

While I was hunched over the prone lass, a man in a business suit staggered into the shop spouting "Duhhh buuuhhhhhr!".  He was obviously quite fabulously drunk.

He then purchased three rad detox kits from the wellbot, chugged a couple cans of soda, jammed a detox kit into his arm, and promptly wet his pants.

Severe rad sickness debuffs brains quite a bit, from what I remember, so his brains stat was probably too low to speak properly, and caffeine gives boosts to brains. I'm surprised he didn't ask you to detox him, though.

Shortly thereafter, I heard Frog commenting on chatnet about how TLE (the corp I was offered a spot in) would take in anybody, including some apparently distasteful individual known as "Scrub".

TLE is a scrubcorp. The chudscrub that ambushed me joined them, and one of their holders ninja'd charnold while I was fighting him. Of course, Vayra is also a holder, which seems odd assuming it's the same old Vayra, though Vayra was behind SCRUBS back when DRS was still a griefercorp (which turned out to be a trap, from what I recall reading; that was a few weeks before I first started playing).

[Dakk]

Congrats on owning that dude. Who runs KING, anyway? And who was it that attacked you/spammed nanites?

KING is ran by rockerfella, Jayde and Malyce. Overall not bad people but some members are a real pain in the ass, and Malyce takes the whole OMG SIMULATOR HQ RAAAID thing a bit too seriously. He also actively refuses to allow anyone else in the corp except his lovey dovey to touch sims or schematics. I've been in king for a while now and I have 2 guys in there that are a blast to play with, thats the only reason I haven't left. rockerfella is a trustworthy guy and Jayde is very helpful, but Malyce is pretty obnoxious, he bitches abut people not being able to go from FC to adamant to defib him in time, and refuses to even make you a schematic on the simulator.

He also apparently thinks of corpmates as his actual employees:
Me: So Ueki, can you get me that hover with the workbenches to the dock?
Ueki: Sure.
Malyce: Workbenches? Why?
Me: For me booooat.
Malyce: ...Only place workbenches need to be at is at the HQ.
Me: Uh, sure, but I'm getting some on my boat aswell.
Long silence follows.

I also don't really think he's that strong, Jayde seems to do most of the hitting, while he tries not to die and obsesses over simulators and schematics.

Hell FLEX, COPS and hbarn members are more chill towards me then Malyce is. I ocasionaly exchange friendly heatbuts with Edwin, learn stuff from Damian, and poke Rute till he does me some ridiculous favor.

[Astral]

As for Scrub... well, he fits in a scrubcorp. His first IRL 5 days or so involved being attached to a 'Friendship button' in the Any Port; pushing said button would cause him to explode into many tiny pieces. Meaning everyone would push this button as many times as they could, and as quickly as possible (he had 5 hours or so that AP was closed I guess that was considered 'safe'). Last time I checked, the counter on that button is around 300. Surprised the guy is still playing, to be honest.

Whats up with TMI? I'd like to hear an outside opinion on them. Dord's a bit of a prude (and he only seems to stop playing HellMOO to sleep), as far as trying to have fun in the game (I find making friends and talking on the *nets fun), even if he's saved my ass more times than I'd like to admit. The founders are pretty chill, even if they're not on quite as often as I'd expect.

I've spent some time having fun playing Cam Hacking Wars with Damian and someone from COPS whose name I can't recall. It's nice to log in and see you're ~2k richer after doing almost nothing, and I haven't been attacked yet, so maybe Dord was overreacting.

[MagmaDeath]

That would be Rute.


TMI, I have never heard of.
Which is a good thing, really.

[Kagus]

While I was hunched over the prone lass, a man in a business suit staggered into the shop spouting "Duhhh buuuhhhhhr!".  He was obviously quite fabulously drunk.

He then purchased three rad detox kits from the wellbot, chugged a couple cans of soda, jammed a detox kit into his arm, and promptly wet his pants.

Severe rad sickness debuffs brains quite a bit, from what I remember, so his brains stat was probably too low to speak properly, and caffeine gives boosts to brains. I'm surprised he didn't ask you to detox him, though.

I'd been playing for maybe a day, and had about 1.16 raw in medic.  And even if I could afford a detox kit (which I couldn't at that time), I wouldn't have picked one up since most of the fellers down at the clinic just need a few bandages or a shot.

Also, he did have an 8 in alcohol.  That's not going to make talking particularly easy either.

Shortly thereafter, I heard Frog commenting on chatnet about how TLE (the corp I was offered a spot in) would take in anybody, including some apparently distasteful individual known as "Scrub".

TLE is a scrubcorp. The chudscrub that ambushed me joined them, and one of their holders ninja'd charnold while I was fighting him. Of course, Vayra is also a holder, which seems odd assuming it's the same old Vayra, though Vayra was behind SCRUBS back when DRS was still a griefercorp (which turned out to be a trap, from what I recall reading; that was a few weeks before I first started playing).

Well gee, that's helpful...  I was approached a few hours ago by Vayra herself, asking me if I'd given any more thought to joining the corp.  A very long discussion followed, and I got her to give me some big ol' fancy mission statement for TLE.  Mainly stuff about leading HellMOO players away from the corrupting influences of stupidity, and towards the light of becoming helpful and intelligent members so that TLE could eventually stand up tall enough to rival COPS, as they didn't have any meaningful competitors.

After that, I decided to let my defenses down a bit and say okay.  Part of me was also trying to be polite.  I mean, after all, the company's CEO came down to talk to me personally and put up with my waffling for quite a long time...  I felt I owed her at least a chance.

Now I'm in and, quite frankly, I'm not hugely impressed.  I learn that really the only thing I'm supposed to be doing now is working to better myself (okay, I realize I'm just some fresh-off-the-street looney with no real skills, but still...  If I'm ruddy well going to be in a corp, I want to work for it specifically, not just go around whoring myself because the medic job's already been completed and they want 10%).  I'm also incredibly judgemental when it comes to netiquette, and some of the chatter bouncing around in the corpchat wasn't exactly my cup o' tea...  Far better than what it could be, no doubt about that...  But I do set the bar pretty damned high.

Also, putting in a section in the 'guide for newbies' about how awesome it is to murder folks and take their belongings (but don't kill people with the N tag more than once if you can help it!), and about how 'fine manners' basically boil down to not griefing people in powerful corporations, because then they'll beat you up and the corp will get shit for it, well...  It doesn't really strike me as the kind of group I particularly want to associate myself with.

Now, lemme get something straight and clear...  I know this is HellMOO.  I know raping, murdering, looting and then butchering people is standard fare.  The strong take from the weak.  It's not just allowed, it's expected.

But that doesn't mean I want to perpetuate it.  Hell, if anything, it makes me all the more determined to do something completely different!  Patching people up free of charge!  Giving them directions!  Carrying around a set of spare clothes should I run into anyone fresh out of the vats (or otherwise naked)!  Not picking a fight with that chap who ejaculated into the ER when I was inside (the same chap who tried handing a cancer patient some fried chicken while I was nonchalantly sitting in a corner popping penis enlargement pills and reading a porno with my pants down)!


Oh, and I met Scrub, briefly.  Good lord, I hope he's joking...  If he honestly behaves that way then, well, I'm just sorry I missed the window for jamming that button.

He said 'hi' by ejaculating onto my hand and then insulting (through his own words, not the command) the person standing next to me.  He was then summarily executed by Frog, who really does turn up at the strangest places.


Speaking of which, I thought I'd heard you wail a few times.  Are you actually a chud?  I didn't see anything in the description that would indicate that.


Anyways, nice to learn that when I finally buckle under and heed everybody's advice to join a freakin' corp already, I apparently join 'the wrong one'.  And it's also great fun having everybody rattle off corp history at me like some two-day neophyte is going to know anything.  Pah!  I'll show them!  I know nothing at all!

Nothing aside from the fact that everybody's a dick and I'm going to bed to cough my way through yet another fever evening.  Good night.

[Sir Pseudonymous]

You're looking for KREW. They're the least FUCK YEAH RANDOM GRIEFING WOOHOO corp, they're run by veterans, and they seem to have at least some standard for who they allow in the corp.

But, early on, no matter what corp you join your job is to improve your own abilities. Think of it as an independent training session to learn how to work there: you can't do much to help out if you have low skills and stats.

[MagmaDeath]

Yep, I am a chud.
Hunched back, yellow eyes, ect.

[sluissa]

Yep, I am a chud.
Hunched back, yellow eyes, ect.

You know you've been listening to too much top 40 radio when you want to instinctively add "bikinis on top" to that. Oddly enough though, in HellMOO, that wouldn't be out of place.