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[stormbringer951]

Most people have Fun mostly if they don't think through their fort design and dwarf-proof it. Putting levers to doomsday projects where anyone can access it is asking for trouble. Fun is most often caused by not being prepared for the first ambush / megabeast / siege either.

[Limul Thak]

1. I've never gotten a baron or more (no nobles).

2. Elves are always kind to me (Armok, spare me!)

3. I've never had magma or HFS, even in 2d .

4. I've never finished a project, mega or otherwise.

5. I've never had an ambush, or siege.

HOWEVER,

1. I've had champions.

2. I've produced more metals and armament then two fortresses need.

3. I've made engravings to chronicle a fortress's history.

4. I've had the military take on kobold groups and win.

5. I've played for the last three (four?) years...

6. ... and enjoyed every minute of it.

Well, I hope that makes you feel better. My accomplishments are far outweighed by my failures as well, but I've had fun anyways.

[uberubert]

I've been playing this game for atleast 2 years now, and even I havent been able to keep a fort descently through atleast two or three sieges yet. This of course is mainly caused by my forts being focused on 99% non-military stuff, as well as a lack of sieges due to forts being abandoned after a couple of years.
However the few rare sieges I have been through, have all been exciting and hilariously fail ^^

Only recently did I even attempt something like these:
-Huge intricate mechanism that does... anything (Failed before I got started)
-Huge megastructure, which would mainly be a box around an elven settlement (Failed due to slowness of water, but will probably be revisited)
-Creating an army larger than 5 dwarves. (Failed, due to lack of priority, again)
-Actually get an iron/steel/something-that-is-metal industry going on a larger scale (Failed due to GCS-trap-malfunction, followed by random siege, followed by random fun)
-Create a zoo containing only goblins, giant cave spider, or other non-normal creatures (succeded!)

Basically, what I'm trying to say is, you don't really need to do something huge, elaborate, or epicly hilarious to have fun in this game. I've had plenty of fun, even with my first few 2d-forts, despite their lack of anything-special-ness. Huge, elaborate or epicly hilarious happenings don't create a well-played game, they only create great material for stories, the other cool result of this game's existance.

[Ioric Kittencuddler]

I always turtle in Strategy games so DF's ability to create intricate impenetrable deathtraps is great for me!

[inaluct]

Orange Drink, I don't think I've done most of the things on that list, either. But I've had my alcohol and dwarves melt on embark, I've had elephant poaching fortresses, I've seen a lake boil and evaporate beside a comfortably warm rainforest, and I've done all of that without a mountain in sight.

Underground features? Mountain things.

HFS? Mountain things.

Magma? A mountain thing.

Some day, the dwellers of the mountains will look out from their crappy, vomit-clad mountainhomes and see the hordes of tanned, strong plainsdwarves approaching. Their feeble defensive measures will not stop us. Their steel and magma cannot stand up to our elephant leather and spirited determination. Soon, our day will come.

You will be one of us, Orange Drink. A true plainsdwarf. You will inherit the earth.

[jaked122]

7) I made a ring menacing with too many spikes to wear (at least I think so).

there are never too many spikes!
1) I have tried to but failed to anger the elves.
2) i have found admantium once(modded)
3) I have tried to build a megatrap, but it killed my fortress... damn flood
4) HFS... chasm? underground river, once but it was short lived due to the chasm.
5) I've modded the dwarves to never drink yet still require alcohol... that worked well..
6) I've modded the dwarves to be larger than the bronze colossus, this really didn't work well.
7) I've made dwarves cats boil away instantaniously.
8 ) my dwarves froze instantaniously, only to be eaten by elves... WTF.
9) I've had a hundred megadragons(damned modding) attack at once.
10) I have never actually made steel? 1-9 were odd.

[Muz]

I keep hearing all of the epic stories of magma cannons spewing utter destruction at stuff, and made me realize I have been playing DF for a year, just to suck at it. If you saw any of my forts, you guys would find me a heretic.

Why? because:

• I haven't reached the HFS. ever.
• I have not discovered anything underground.
• I haven't done anything awesome with magma or water for that matter.
• The first time I got nobles was just last week.
• I have not built anything remotely large aboveground.
• I have not experienced any form of onslaught involving elephants, unicorns, and/or carp.
• I haven't even made a single bar of steel.
• I haven't even KILLED ELVES!

Lol, I didn't do most of those (except the steel). Maybe did the magma too, if you consider making obsidian as awesome. Hell, I haven't even experienced a siege yet.

But I enjoy the game more if I don't have to compare to other people

[Jim Groovester]

I think I suck at Dwarf Fortress, too. In my current dwarf fort, I've had twenty one deaths so far. Most of them were from goblin ambushes. Four were from an aggressive giant cave swallow. Two were from murder. Did I mention that I'm in my third year?

The most extensive above ground project I've done was a human city with an obsidian block replica of the Capitol Building, and a giant granite block wall to go along with it. Neither reached the top z-level.

The most extensive underground project I've done is greatly expand a tiny cave river. In the goblin fort I'm also playing, I'm greatly expanding it fourfold.

I've never breached the [redacted] within a regular fortress nor made any [redacted] items, so I've never dealt with the [redacted].

I don't antagonize the elves. They're people who take all my junk.

I'm addicted to savescumming. It's a horrible, horrible, addiction. But it's hard not to when cave crocodiles decide to freely swim through your three deep fortifications and eliminate your fortress.

I've got big Dwarf Fortress ambition, though, if that counts for anything. Unfortunately, I don't always have a computer to work it out.

[Ioric Kittencuddler]

I caught a dragon in my *Spiral Hallway of Cagey Doom* and didn't know what to do with it for the longest time, so I set up the cage and attached it to a lever, then surrounded it with a bunch of other caged enemies...  Right when I finished placing the other cages a siege came!  My first siege in forever!  So unfortunately I couldn't do my cool mock battle, but I already had my dragon cage connected so I figured it had worked out ok.... so I pull the lever, and the dragon just sits there....  So I try fiddling with doors so that the goblins will come near it, and eventually they do.  The Dragon charges them, breaths fire way too early and misses everyone, then gets mobbed by ten trained goblin soldiers and a champion of some kind...  He takes out one of them, and then dies horribly... bit of an anticlimax...

Anyway, I lured them down my *Spiral Hallway of Cagey Doom* until they realized what it was and ran back out to wait.  So then I lured them into the bottom of my empty moat and filled it... Somehow some of them still managed to get to the other side, but by that point they had given up, and they ran away as soon as I let them out.

[Helmaroc]

I keep hearing all of the epic stories of magma cannons spewing utter destruction at stuff, and made me realize I have been playing DF for a year, just to suck at it. If you saw any of my forts, you guys would find me a heretic.

Why? because:

• I haven't reached the HFS. ever.
• I have not discovered anything underground.
• I haven't done anything awesome with magma or water for that matter.
• The first time I got nobles was just last week.
• I have not built anything remotely large aboveground.
• I have not experienced any form of onslaught involving elephants, unicorns, and/or carp.
• I haven't even made a single bar of steel.
• I haven't even KILLED ELVES!

I haven't done any of that either, I've been playing for over a year now.

[Ryalseth]

I embarked on a glacier island, one of the safest if most boring locations possible. No goblins, no kobolds, no ambushes or sieges are even possible. Despite this, I've still managed to kill 17 dwarves to date. Including two legendary miners, one of them encased in ice.

Other reasons I suck:

1. I've never defeated a siege except by waiting it out.
2. My first order of business at goblin sites is to cave-in the dark towers.
3. I'm a massive turtler. I almost never let dwarves go outside and my passive defenses thwart everything except demons.
4. I'm too lazy for exploratory mining.
5. I don't make or use a lot of metal, even though I make sure I'm able to import/mine flux and work with magma.
6. I've used Reveal to find underground features and savescummed to make sure they work correctly. *shame*
7. I've cheated my way into massive amounts of adamantine armor in Adventure mode and promptly got killed by a bolt through the heart on my first trip to a goblin tower.

[Redhades]

I wouldn't say that "we" suck at DF, but maybe it's that DF sucks in certain ways, just a little. 
Now, I'm not hating the game here. But the more I play, the less I feel that DF is actually a game, by my definition of what a game is and what keeps me into a game.
I find the DF is not so purpose or goal oriented. I would qualify it more as a toy in the same sense as how Noby Noby Boy is more a toy than a game.

[Zironic]

I find general skirmishes between unarmored wrestle dwarves ( some with swords) fighting legions of bowgoblins and such entertaining. And Gruesome.

[Ioric Kittencuddler]

I wouldn't say that "we" suck at DF, but maybe it's that DF sucks in certain ways, just a little. 
Now, I'm not hating the game here. But the more I play, the less I feel that DF is actually a game, by my definition of what a game is and what keeps me into a game.
I find the DF is not so purpose or goal oriented. I would qualify it more as a toy in the same sense as how Noby Noby Boy is more a toy than a game.

It's a simulation.

[JmzLost]

I suck too!

1.  I've never dug deep enough for HFS, except once on a map I knew didn't have any.
2.  I only "discover" underground stuff that I already know is there(changed init.txt, FINDER->ALWAYS).
3.  I tried building a tower-cap farm.  Twice.  I learned 2 things:
          a. Be very careful with ramps around underground rivers.
          b. Waterwheels go UPSTREAM of the six pumps you're using to drain the river, otherwise they stop.
4.  Nobles?  I got a Dungeon Master.  Once.
5.  I built a single story wall around a 3x3 embark.  It didn't save the kittens who were chasing butterflies, though.
6.  The only "onslaught" I've had was Rhesus Macaques 3 seasons in a row.  Including Spring of 201.  "Urist McMiner cancels Pickup Equipement: Interrupted by Rhesus Macaque"
7.  I've made steel a few times, but I end up using it for picks and axes.  If I want steel armour or weapons, I'll steal them from the Dwarven caravan.  But the 150+ cage traps mean I really don't need it.
8.  The Elves are nice.  They bring me Lions and Tigers and Grizzly Bears, oh my!


9.  I've had 1 tantrumming dorf, who had 2 counseling sessions with the mayor and beat up an engraver.  Then he stopped tantrumming.
10  I've never had a siege.  I usually abondon because of low FPS. My new computer+40d11 my change that. (I know, play the Orc mod, siege in 1st Winter, yadda, yadda, yadda...)
11.  I've modded sand into about 1/2 of the forts I've played, and still never built a +Green Glass Tower+.


No epic stories, no epic constructions, just a lot of time lost trying to keep the dorfs happy in a little hole in the ground.  Meanwhile, the XBOX and PS2/3 sit idle, because DF is more interesting than anything the consoles put out, even with their flashy graphics.

JMZ