To the mermaids' sanctuary! Known as the Rana Sea.
Shoruke: Geez, no wonder mom said to stay away from mermaids.
Shoruke: Yeah I just said that like, 2 speech boxes ago. Now TAKE ME TO YOUR LEADER.
Shoruke: So... uh... the strongest mermaid in the whole world is level 12? Jeez, now if only you guys showed up later in the game even once, that would be such an easy battle.
Aerial: SHUT UP AND FIGHT!
Shoruke: Uh, which one is the violent species again?
*BATTLE START*
Shoruke: "Okay everyone, we're dividing into two fronts. Us ninjas will take the water front, the rest of you, stay to the right and try to fight on dry land where you don't suck. GO!"
Duke: Hey, uh Shoruke? Are you sure the three of you will be able to handle the two faeries, two octopi, and however many mermaids jump into the water?
Shoruke: We will be able to if you HURRY YOUR ASS ACROSS THE WATER!
Vlynndar: Way to be, slowpokes.
ArcAngel: Hey, it's really hard to get across water with all this armor, even if the stuff in our actual inventories is the same as yours. We can't all be ninjas with attack spells and waterwalking and SEVEN base movement.
Vlynndar: Heh.
Shoruke: This isn't working out nearly how I'd planned it. We've turned into the forward group and rear group, and of course the ones who can't fight in water are stuck fighting in the water. Dammit. Everyone cluster! Starting next turn!
Strife: Hey that sounds kinda... nice... *snore*
Shoruke: Dammit.
*Strife woke up again as our turn began and I didn't get a screenshot in time. Sorry.*
Shoruke: Okay, new tactic. Again. Even though we didn't even get to start the last one. EVERYONE CHARGE!
Troops: YAY!
Shoruke: And leave the leader for last!
Troops: Dammit Shork!
*on the enemy's turn*
Mermaid: Lullaby!
Other Mermaid: Lullaby!
(Aerial is hitting ArcAngel with her spear, in case the picture is too small to make out the details)
Shoruke: ...Geez. These mermaids would be kicking our asses if they could get their tactics together.
ArcAngel: *snore* Hwuh? Is it time to wake up already?
Vlynndar: Yup, wakey-wakey. You were only asleep for six seconds, and then Aerial here poked you with her dad's trident.
ArcAngel: Funny how something like that can wake you up.
Vlynndar: Yeah. No lightning though, that's the OTHER mermaid's spear.
Shoruke: You KNOW about Longi-
Inaluct: Shh! You'll ruin the plot!
Shoruke: Oh. You're right.
Strife: *wakes up again* So why do they bother putting me to sleep at all?
Okenido: The AI is convinced that if they create a list of all the moves they can do, and then use a random number generator to figure out which one to use, they can win.
Strife: ...aaaand...?
Okenido: And they're wrong.
Strife: Ah.
Aerial: Vulgar motherF***ing humans! I'm gonna a**rape you with this trident you so hard your grandparents will s*** sideways!
Okenido: Hey, WTF! You don't hit the cleric, that's just not cool!
Aerial: Don't you realize!? I had every other member of my team go to the left just to leave you, the cleric, wide open! Ahahaha! Artificial Intelligence knows no bounds!
Okenido: Well, you missed a key point in your little 'plan'.
Aerial: Don't f***ing insult me, you worthless piece of s*** human! I missed nothing in my perfect plan!
Okenido: Heal.
Okenido: And I can do this all day.
Aerial: Nooo! How could I have forgotten that human clerics can heal themselves?!?
Shoruke: Because the AI is that dumb. Oh by the way, we took care of all your little mermaid and octopus friends. And now it's your turn. *SMITE*
Shoruke: Wait what? You still have 3hp left. Oh wait, I get it, it's merciful cutscene time.
Geez, and she's EMO too.
Shoruke: Great! Where is the sanctuary?
Mermaid: Did you not notice the HUGE-A** MOTHERF***ING HOLE IN THE WALL?!? Seriously, it's RIGHT F***ING THERE!
Shoruke: ...oh.
To sum the story up with very, very few screenshots, the spear isn't here because 400 years ago the humans and mermaids were at war but a mermaid fell in love with a human and ran away with the spear because it was the mermaids' only real way to fight (go figure, lvl 12's with a godspear can ONLY fight decently with the godspear) and she figured if the mermaids couldn't put up any resistance the fighting would stop, but it didn't and the mermaids lost and the human gave the spear to his family so we don't know where it is. Oh by the way, the mermaid who stole the spear is my sister and has golden scales, so if you see her *EPIC FORESHADOWING* please tell her we aren't pissed as hell at her anymore and she can come home.
(at some point there was a Crowning Moment of Awesome involving a mermaid roasting a human with lightning from the spear, but again I missed it. I was fast-forwarding through the cutscene. Pity the Sacred Spear can't do the lightning thing in any other part of the game.
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Topic: Let's Play: Tactics Ogre (Knight of Lodis) (Read 41676 times)