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Author Topic: "Baby has drowned" a terrible tale of dwarven ignorance.  (Read 4359 times)

ZergSpartan

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Re: "Baby has drowned" a terrible tale of dwarven ignorance.
« Reply #15 on: April 30, 2009, 04:44:52 am »
Only thing worse I can think of involved a Baby Dwarf, a "Tame" fire imp, and more then a thousand units of booze...

Needless to say flaming baby chunks were everywhere.
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Quote from: Raphite1 on April 14, 2009, 09:40:33 pm
"Yeah. My plan was to drop some kittens into the siege, and have my dwarves freefall into battle, landing on top of the kittens. The plan was kinda dumb though because the kittens were standing on grates, and the goblins killed them with arrows just as I was releasing the freefalling dwarves. So the dwarves weren't able to land on kittens and just fell and died."

Yanlin

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Re: "Baby has drowned" a terrible tale of dwarven ignorance.
« Reply #16 on: April 30, 2009, 06:30:11 am »
What do you call a flame war in a booze stockpile?

Awesome.
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WE NEED A SLOGAN!

Tormy

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Re: "Baby has drowned" a terrible tale of dwarven ignorance.
« Reply #17 on: April 30, 2009, 07:20:15 am »
Quote from: Nerserus on April 29, 2009, 05:29:18 pm
The miner not really giving two shits kind of carried on channelling

This sounds very dwarvenly!  ;D
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codezero

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Re: "Baby has drowned" a terrible tale of dwarven ignorance.
« Reply #18 on: April 30, 2009, 08:06:37 am »
Would you really have wanted the miner to go back for it if she was legendary? Something similar just happened to me, the baby got washed out of the miners hands and I was mentally screaming no don't go back for it, think of yourself first! The baby's still alive, it isn't that deep in there really.
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Ieb

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Re: "Baby has drowned" a terrible tale of dwarven ignorance.
« Reply #19 on: April 30, 2009, 09:35:20 am »
Could be worse.

A peasant gave birth to twins, while taking a drink from the well. End result: One child happily in her arms, the other fell down the well. Mother walks away while the other kid is drowning.

Now, I don't really care if a baby dies, but I do care when the rotting body is impossible to retrieve without excessive effort and it annoys other dwarves.
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Mipe

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Re: "Baby has drowned" a terrible tale of dwarven ignorance.
« Reply #20 on: April 30, 2009, 11:50:32 am »
Baby-flavored water?

Baby ghost of the well?
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sonerohi

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Re: "Baby has drowned" a terrible tale of dwarven ignorance.
« Reply #21 on: April 30, 2009, 04:32:43 pm »
Quote from: tp12 on April 30, 2009, 04:31:30 am
Quote from: Flashzom on April 30, 2009, 03:38:45 am
Quote from: Protactinium on April 29, 2009, 09:14:11 pm
Quote from: AncientEnemy on April 29, 2009, 07:20:57 pm
How is babby drowned?

They need to do way in drain brother...
who kill thier babbys. becuse these babby cant frigth back it was on the news this mroing a brother in ar who had kill he babby brother . they are taking the chrild back to new york too lady to rest my pary are with the father who lost his chrilden ; i am truley sorry for your lots
???
You do know this forum is about Dwarf Fortress right?

I hope he also realizes that his post is incomprehensible.
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I picked up the stone and carved my name into the wind.

Flashzom

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Re: "Baby has drowned" a terrible tale of dwarven ignorance.
« Reply #22 on: April 30, 2009, 05:34:54 pm »
Quote from: sonerohi on April 30, 2009, 04:32:43 pm
Quote from: tp12 on April 30, 2009, 04:31:30 am
Quote from: Flashzom on April 30, 2009, 03:38:45 am
Quote from: Protactinium on April 29, 2009, 09:14:11 pm
Quote from: AncientEnemy on April 29, 2009, 07:20:57 pm
How is babby drowned?

They need to do way in drain brother...
who kill thier babbys. becuse these babby cant frigth back it was on the news this mroing a brother in ar who had kill he babby brother . they are taking the chrild back to new york too lady to rest my pary are with the father who lost his chrilden ; i am truley sorry for your lots
???
You do know this forum is about Dwarf Fortress right?

I hope he also realizes that his post is incomprehensible.
I am disappointed in the fact that you did not get the joke.
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And as the fires licked and roared over his skin, Urist realized that the hustle and bustle of being on fire really tired him out.

Protactinium

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Re: "Baby has drowned" a terrible tale of dwarven ignorance.
« Reply #23 on: April 30, 2009, 06:32:29 pm »
Quote from: sonerohi on April 30, 2009, 04:32:43 pm
Quote from: tp12 on April 30, 2009, 04:31:30 am
Quote from: Flashzom on April 30, 2009, 03:38:45 am
Quote from: Protactinium on April 29, 2009, 09:14:11 pm
Quote from: AncientEnemy on April 29, 2009, 07:20:57 pm
How is babby drowned?

They need to do way in drain brother...
who kill thier babbys. becuse these babby cant frigth back it was on the news this mroing a brother in ar who had kill he babby brother . they are taking the chrild back to new york too lady to rest my pary are with the father who lost his chrilden ; i am truley sorry for your lots
???
You do know this forum is about Dwarf Fortress right?

I hope he also realizes that his post is incomprehensible.

http://www.somethingawful.com/flash/shmorky/babby.swf
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Quote from: Stargrasper on December 02, 2009, 03:49:52 pm
Quote from: hughesdylan on December 02, 2009, 02:23:27 pm
The thing that confuses me about dorfs is this. Dorf 1 dies in an avalance or somesuch. Dorf 2 is friends with dorf 3 and dorf 1. Dorf 2 berserks because of his friends death and kills dorf 3. also a friend. W. T. F.
Clearly you've never been drunk.

tigrex

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Re: "Baby has drowned" a terrible tale of dwarven ignorance.
« Reply #24 on: May 01, 2009, 06:07:49 am »
Babies and children are mostly just there to add a human touch to a fort, and give me endless hours of mirth with their suicidal antics.

The same thing happened to me, by the way, except I was channeling lava, not water.  :)  For some reason the game feels more real when needless accidents kill innocent (and useless) dwarves.
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Leafsnail

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Re: "Baby has drowned" a terrible tale of dwarven ignorance.
« Reply #25 on: May 01, 2009, 11:38:29 am »
Another dimwitted dwarf moment here.  I'd like to ask you who should be blamed for this silly sequence of events at the end.

First, my noble mandated the construction of pewter goods.  Hmm, no pewter anywhere, so I ignored him.  The mandate ran out.

Of course, the captain of the guard (a soapmaker) took it upon himself to arrest one of my metalcrafters.  He slung her into my ever empty jail.

Nevermind, I thought.  She won't mind much, it's only 30 days, and I have a replacement metalcrafter standing by.

Then the messages started "Urist McMetalcrafter cancels seeking infant: Infant innaccessable".

I realised this message came EVERY SINGLE FRAME.  100s of messages built up, with "Urist McMetalcrafter cancels seeking infant: Infant innaccessable" x312 happening.  So, for 30 days, I had to endure this spam.

So, who's to blame - the noble, the child, the metalcrafter or the captain?
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Dizzerp

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Re: "Baby has drowned" a terrible tale of dwarven ignorance.
« Reply #26 on: May 01, 2009, 12:17:56 pm »
how is dwarf babby drowned?
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Lord_Shadow

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Re: "Baby has drowned" a terrible tale of dwarven ignorance.
« Reply #27 on: May 01, 2009, 12:35:40 pm »
I make babies grow into peasants as soon as they are born cheating? yes.
Does it save hundreds of lives thanks to the fact that i don't have children randomly pulling levers, talking constantly to everything that moves, and generally wasting space doing nothing? yes.

IMO (in my opinion)
children<nobles<elves
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Quote from: Reese on February 08, 2010, 06:16:15 pm
Quote from: Aspgren on February 08, 2010, 04:37:22 pm
Urist McCarpenter cancels rest: QUITSCREWINGWITHMAHBUCKETSYOUSONOFABITCHES!!!
Urist Mccarpenter has gone stark raving mad!
Urist McWalrusCarpenter cancels rest: Has u seen mah bukkit?!

Leafsnail

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Re: "Baby has drowned" a terrible tale of dwarven ignorance.
« Reply #28 on: May 01, 2009, 12:50:41 pm »
Quote from: Lord_Shadow on May 01, 2009, 12:35:40 pm
children randomly pulling levers
What, you mean children sometimes just decide to pull levers?  Jesus, and the emergency front-entrance-flood lever is just in my mayor's room...
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zchris13

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Re: "Baby has drowned" a terrible tale of dwarven ignorance.
« Reply #29 on: May 03, 2009, 09:42:38 am »
Quote from: Leafsnail on May 01, 2009, 12:50:41 pm
Quote from: Lord_Shadow on May 01, 2009, 12:35:40 pm
children randomly pulling levers
What, you mean children sometimes just decide to pull levers?  Jesus, and the emergency front-entrance-flood lever is just in my mayor's room...
Urist McHauler cancels dump item:  Dangerous terrain
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