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Author Topic: "Baby has drowned" a terrible tale of dwarven ignorance.  (Read 4373 times)

Nerserus

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"Baby has drowned" a terrible tale of dwarven ignorance.
« on: April 29, 2009, 05:29:18 pm »

I need to release some GODLY RAGE!

Well, as you might have read in another thread ( Hey, that rhymes! Anywho ) that my axe dwarf Bomrek, got his leg broken by a thief...Yeah, embarrising, well, i tried to make a well to actually keep him alive. My miner was doing great, everything was going to plan. THEN. At the last freaking second, a child thinks it's a great idea to run inside the flooding well. Luckily he escaped and all was swell. Until: Datan Uristkib, Baby has drowned. Yeah. So, this "Caring dwarf brother" appearently went into the well with his baby bro, and kinda...Left him there...The miner not really giving two shits kind of carried on channelling ( I know i told her to but, i didn't even know it was in there and it was kind of common sense ) suddenly miner: "OH MY GOD MY BABY! HE IS DEAD AND IT'S ALL NERSERUS'S FAULT BECAUSE I DIDN'T SAVE HIM, YEAH, THAT'S MY STORY AND I'M STICKING TO IT..." Seriously. When i thought dwarves could not be anymore retarded, that happens. WHO LEAVES, A BABY IN A FREAKING WELL?

At any rate, the only annoying thing about Dwarf Fortress is that fortress mode is a brutal twisted blend of "Dwarves doing everything themselves" and "You cleaning up the mess and solving the inevitable problems", honestly, i never saw this coming, i may sound like i'm over-reacting, but so would you if you just saw a child go into a well, leave his brother there, then just casually walk away as he drowns. If that were not a child, me thinks chasm + dwarf = Splat.

EDIT: Slightly amusing note, the child has "Lost a sibling recently" ( Thats because you left him in a well you dumbass ), yet it says: ESTATIC!, i can imagine him talking to another dwarf:

Urist Mcmayor: "So what did you do after i iced an Orc thief with my bare hands?"

Urist Mchild: "Well, i threw my brother down the well, and he kinda drowned, i also saw the same bed i saw every day, and for some reason it kind of made me feel better about being a heartless retarded ass-hole. So to celebrate i got pissed and randomly talked to people about how happy i am now that my sibling is now 7 feet under water and we'll never retrieve his body. :)"
« Last Edit: April 29, 2009, 05:33:57 pm by Nerserus »
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stack of 10 prepared dragonfly brains - I'm trying to imagine what's more funny: a dwarf popping a tiny dragonfly brain into his mouth for a snack, the butcher who actually prepared this feast, or the brave hunter who ventured out into the wilderness and returned with this bounty.

Argonnek

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Re: "Baby has drowned" a terrible tale of dwarven ignorance.
« Reply #1 on: April 29, 2009, 05:40:30 pm »

I wonder if there's family counseling planned for the future

sonerohi

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Re: "Baby has drowned" a terrible tale of dwarven ignorance.
« Reply #2 on: April 29, 2009, 05:49:24 pm »

Kinda your fault. There are thousands of easy precautions to take to ensure no deaths. Noone to blame but yourself.
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Lord Dullard

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Re: "Baby has drowned" a terrible tale of dwarven ignorance.
« Reply #3 on: April 29, 2009, 05:58:05 pm »

After a while these sorts of things stop bothering you and you just let the dwarves do the idiotic things that dwarves will do. It's part of the game.

All DF players eventually get the 'S/he doesn't really care about anything anymore' appended to their personality profile.
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Nerserus

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Re: "Baby has drowned" a terrible tale of dwarven ignorance.
« Reply #4 on: April 29, 2009, 06:03:29 pm »

Kinda your fault. There are thousands of easy precautions to take to ensure no deaths. Noone to blame but yourself.
Seriously, i did everything in my power to make it safe, and it damn would of been, had he not of been the miners son, i forbidded the door once my miner was in so she could do her work, but guess what? Her son came in as well, honestly, there was NOTHING, i could of done, i unforbidded the door, but i was too f'ing late, the miner was on her break, and by Armok she is going to have her break even if all her children die if she does.

Then, the child inevitably left, i thought the worst was over, but no, he only left his damned brother in there. He drowned, that was, quite literally, all i knew of him being there ( I didn't even see him go in, my plan was fool proof, but again i under-estimated the power of fools... ), it was pure bad luck that killed the baby, but had the dwarves been intelligent enough to grab the child ( Even just to hold it and take it everywhere, like mothers normally do ), it would of been different.
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stack of 10 prepared dragonfly brains - I'm trying to imagine what's more funny: a dwarf popping a tiny dragonfly brain into his mouth for a snack, the butcher who actually prepared this feast, or the brave hunter who ventured out into the wilderness and returned with this bounty.

Jim Groovester

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Re: "Baby has drowned" a terrible tale of dwarven ignorance.
« Reply #5 on: April 29, 2009, 06:04:14 pm »

WHO LEAVES, A BABY IN A FREAKING WELL?

Have you played Peasant's Quest by any chance?
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I understood nothing, contributed nothing, but still got to win, so good game everybody else.

Nerserus

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Re: "Baby has drowned" a terrible tale of dwarven ignorance.
« Reply #6 on: April 29, 2009, 06:10:12 pm »

WHO LEAVES, A BABY IN A FREAKING WELL?

Have you played Peasant's Quest by any chance?
Nope, but i'm a serious AVGN fan.
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stack of 10 prepared dragonfly brains - I'm trying to imagine what's more funny: a dwarf popping a tiny dragonfly brain into his mouth for a snack, the butcher who actually prepared this feast, or the brave hunter who ventured out into the wilderness and returned with this bounty.

ZomBuster

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Re: "Baby has drowned" a terrible tale of dwarven ignorance.
« Reply #7 on: April 29, 2009, 06:12:28 pm »

I got a baby drowned once too, I just opened my water trap and one of the dwarfs running in to grab the goods off the drowned elves in there accidently dropped their baby. The water was still flooding out of the trap so the baby flushed into a nearby pool  :'(
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kotekzot

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Re: "Baby has drowned" a terrible tale of dwarven ignorance.
« Reply #8 on: April 29, 2009, 07:18:58 pm »

it's just dwarves being dwarves.
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Bro, your like... thinking like a square man... its like, the WHOLE lamprey is just like, one big NECK dude, you know? its like hahahaha! dude protect the trees though, seriously. *inhale*... anyways... you like, want this dead black bear, bro?

AncientEnemy

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Re: "Baby has drowned" a terrible tale of dwarven ignorance.
« Reply #9 on: April 29, 2009, 07:20:57 pm »

How is babby drowned?

Protactinium

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Re: "Baby has drowned" a terrible tale of dwarven ignorance.
« Reply #10 on: April 29, 2009, 09:14:11 pm »

How is babby drowned?

They need to do way in drain brother...
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The thing that confuses me about dorfs is this. Dorf 1 dies in an avalance or somesuch. Dorf 2 is friends with dorf 3 and dorf 1. Dorf 2 berserks because of his friends death and kills dorf 3. also a friend. W. T. F.
Clearly you've never been drunk.

Rutilant

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Re: "Baby has drowned" a terrible tale of dwarven ignorance.
« Reply #11 on: April 30, 2009, 12:36:25 am »

Kinda your fault. There are thousands of easy precautions to take to ensure no deaths. Noone to blame but yourself.
( I didn't even see him go in, my plan was fool proof, but again i under-estimated the power of fools... )

Mayday, mayday, I am Nerserus! My plans were foolproof, but then it started feeding on the rays! And then Moltar had a plan that never would have worked! I need a ship to rescue me!

I'll be waiting for you by the front gate.
« Last Edit: February 10, 2011, 05:22:14 pm by Rutilant »
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Nerserus

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Re: "Baby has drowned" a terrible tale of dwarven ignorance.
« Reply #12 on: April 30, 2009, 01:32:43 am »

Kinda your fault. There are thousands of easy precautions to take to ensure no deaths. Noone to blame but yourself.
( I didn't even see him go in, my plan was fool proof, but again i under-estimated the power of fools... )

Mayday, mayday, I am Nerserus! My plans were foolproof, but then it started feeding on the rays! And the Moltar had a plan that never would have worked! I need a ship to rescue me!

I'll be waiting for you by the front gate.
Eh?...
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stack of 10 prepared dragonfly brains - I'm trying to imagine what's more funny: a dwarf popping a tiny dragonfly brain into his mouth for a snack, the butcher who actually prepared this feast, or the brave hunter who ventured out into the wilderness and returned with this bounty.

Flashzom

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Re: "Baby has drowned" a terrible tale of dwarven ignorance.
« Reply #13 on: April 30, 2009, 03:38:45 am »

How is babby drowned?

They need to do way in drain brother...
who kill thier babbys. becuse these babby cant frigth back it was on the news this mroing a brother in ar who had kill he babby brother . they are taking the chrild back to new york too lady to rest my pary are with the father who lost his chrilden ; i am truley sorry for your lots
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tp12

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Re: "Baby has drowned" a terrible tale of dwarven ignorance.
« Reply #14 on: April 30, 2009, 04:31:30 am »

How is babby drowned?

They need to do way in drain brother...
who kill thier babbys. becuse these babby cant frigth back it was on the news this mroing a brother in ar who had kill he babby brother . they are taking the chrild back to new york too lady to rest my pary are with the father who lost his chrilden ; i am truley sorry for your lots
???
You do know this forum is about Dwarf Fortress right?
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Untill recently, before stocks ran out, it rained cats and dogs in my fortress...
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