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[Nerserus]

I captured an orc thief, i was about to throw him into my blendtech blender, so, my milker came and grabbed him, then he threw him in the hole. I thought it was all over. How wrong i was, i expected the three z level fall to crush his legs ( And it normally does ) but this orc didn't suffer a scratch and was quite cocky standing next to the weapon trap at the bottom, minding his own buisness. So i sent my note-worthy chosen warrior killer ( Chosen warriors are bad ass i mention ), Bomrek, who is armoured in full keen platemail ( Keen is a modded material, it's alot tougher than steel let alone iron ), armed with only his puny iron dagger, the orc jumped out of the hatch and Broke Bomrek's leg!, he then pushed him aside and ran down the hallway, if i had the choice i would of let him go just for being so epic. But nay, it was not to be.

He got down the hallway, then my mayor got him from behind, he punched him in the chest from behind, and he was badly bruised, he crawled on the floor for a second trying to get away, but the mayor inevitably caught up, and broke his spine, he then "broke" his liver, and crippled him one bone at a time until he died. Definitely deserves a monument to the greatness of the orcs. Smunstu Olngozastrur, badass thief.

[DWeird]

he punched him in the chest from behind, and he was badly bruised

...so your mayor punched straight through the thief's torso and the orc was only bruised? Nice.

[Hishan]

Epic tale, and good work on playing chaos reigns mod

[Nerserus]

It's an awesome mod, made two fortresses already.

[Hishan]

Yeah my friend made it and I tested it and made a pretty banner , chosne warriors are tough as hell

[Swiftfreddy]

Monument for the orc?

That mayor is pretty badass. No wonder he is mayor.

[zchris13]

Monument for the orc?
That mayor is pretty badass. No wonder he is mayor.

Badassitude is a common side effect of being in charge in dwarf fortress.

[Nerserus]

Monument for the orc?
That mayor is pretty badass. No wonder he is mayor.

Badassitude is a common side effect of being in charge in dwarf fortress.

"NOBODY EXPECTS URIST MCMAYOR!" ( Epic manouvere theme song plays ) *Punches the orc from behind, then breaks his spine and every bone in his body *. I suppose that paticular mayor had a pretty bad day, lets say he came home and found the local champion in bed with his wife, the booze he was drinking caught alight and burnt his beard, then he went to "clean" a trap in the middle of a siege. That would probably explain why the mayor was so hell-bent on kicking the crap out of the orc. Heheh. I can imagine it:

Orc thief: "Get out of my way!"
Mayor: "Oh no you don't, for the next thirty or so turns you're OFFICIALLY, MY BITCH!"
* Cracks knuckles *

[zchris13]

On the orc's skull?

[Limul Thak]

No, in between the vertebrae, apparently.

Well, technically if it only bruised him then it didn't get into the spine, but you get my point.

[zchris13]

I suddenly want to crack my knuckles using another person's head.

[Itnetlolor]

he punched him in the chest from behind, and he was badly bruised

...so your mayor punched straight through the thief's torso and the orc was only bruised? Nice.

This just reminded me of an episode of Red vs. Blue. When one of the characters was being introduced, if I remembered correctly, she was beating someone to death with their own skull.

Tucker: "But that's physically impossible!!"
Church: "That's what he said as she was killing him."
:changes scene to a trooper being beaten to death by Tex with a skull:
Victim: "THIS IS PHYSICALLY IMPOSSIBLE!!!"