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Author Topic: Lame artifacts!  (Read 56976 times)

Raz

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Re: Lame artifacts!
« Reply #45 on: April 28, 2009, 10:54:48 pm »

Gauntlets and boots are constructed in pairs. I tested this just the other day. :P
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"I can't wait to procrastinate!"

Phoenix_Kensai

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Re: Lame artifacts!
« Reply #46 on: April 29, 2009, 07:17:31 pm »

Quote
Atoleshim, "Truefree", a groundhog leather cloak

This is a groundhog leather cloak. All craftdwarfship is of the highest quality. It is decorated with groundhog leather.
Worth 2400.

...

...Well, at least the name is decent.
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Teferi

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Re: Lame artifacts!
« Reply #47 on: April 30, 2009, 12:06:32 am »

Lunmigrur "The Cloudy Ocean" A bauxite crown

This is a bauxite crown. All craftdwarfship is of the highest quality. This item is encircled with bands of Orthoclase. This item menaces with spikes of Bauxite and Orthoclase.

worth 4800.

pfft. can't even destroy it with "solution to everything".

The only upside is I got a legendary engraver out of the deal.
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I think it'd be better to just throw him in a pit.
By pit I mean "ledge designated as pit some 30 levels above the ground water magma" and that would,as they say be the end of that.
Unless a sword/axedwarf gets to 'em.. then it's rhesus pieces...

McSmaster

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Re: Lame artifacts!
« Reply #48 on: April 30, 2009, 12:32:53 am »

A Pine Toy Axe. One of the inscriptions is:

On the item is an image of Tirist Tomesmurder the dwarf in Pine. Tirist Tomesmurder is cooking. The artwork relates to the masterful stew prepared by the dwarf...

lol? it must have been a boring year...and an equally lame artifact to match. Maybe if it were elf stew...

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Engraved on the wall is a masterfully designed image of elves. The elves are weeping.

Yanlin

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Re: Lame artifacts!
« Reply #49 on: April 30, 2009, 03:13:07 am »

My most recent artifact:

It is made of steel. Encircled with bands of marble. Menaces with spikes of obsidian. Encrusted with diamonds. Has an image of my previous toy boat on it in some of my finest leather.

It's a hatch cover.

FFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!
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Ampersand

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Re: Lame artifacts!
« Reply #50 on: April 30, 2009, 04:13:14 am »

I remember when I got my worst artifact. It was an iron vial. Totally lame, but it started showing up in the artwork of that world EVERYWHERE. Every fortress I made in that world, every Goblin temple and human temple. Then It showed up engraved on my best artifact ever. An adamantine mace that I recovered in adventure mode, that swatted giant desert scorpions miles.

I get a little happy whenever I see an artifact vial.

Also, fun fact, that adventurer died when a demon grappled it away. FFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUU-
« Last Edit: April 30, 2009, 04:15:00 am by Ampersand »
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Leafsnail

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Re: Lame artifacts!
« Reply #51 on: April 30, 2009, 11:38:09 am »

"This is a sapphire cage.  All craftdwarfship of the highest quality.  This object is adorned with hanging rings of sapphire and dog leather and menaces with spikes of lace agate (wtf?).  On the item is an image of dwarves in sapphire.  The dwarves are labouring."

Value: 147,600
Total value of my fort: 281,955
Value of fort that isn't sapphire cage: 134,355

And there I was thinking I was doomed to lame artifacts forever.  Awesome.  But I have a few questions:

1. Will the cage count as room goodness (ie will it make a room legendary?).  In which case, should I put it in my dining room to make everyone happy?
2. Will this trigger a huge wave of immigration?
3. If I decide to disassemble the cage, will it still be there?
4. What can I use my "Legendary Gem Cutter" for? 
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Time Kitten

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Re: Lame artifacts!
« Reply #52 on: April 30, 2009, 11:59:11 am »

1. Yes, as constructed.
2. Maybe, depends on relative value to your fort.
3. Yes
4. When a legendary gem cutter cuts gems, they often make crafts instead, leaving you with masterwork ruby crowns and the like.
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Albedo

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Re: Lame artifacts!
« Reply #53 on: April 30, 2009, 02:28:35 pm »

I believe they also create more "large gems", which are worth much more (and, I ~think~, a separate demand from moody dwarfs).

Gauntlets and boots are constructed in pairs. I tested this just the other day. :P

Confirmed - BUT, they aren't necessarily "matched" pairs - qualities are determined separately for left and right.  Fun, innit?  ::)
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Grimlocke

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Re: Lame artifacts!
« Reply #54 on: April 30, 2009, 03:15:21 pm »

My dwarves make retarded numbers of artifact mugs... Stone mugs, wooden mugs, I have no idea why. They are utterly useless though, arnt worth much, cant put em in rooms and my drarves dont even drink booze from them!
I had a dwarve make one of those mugs out of raw adamantine, that was kinda neat i guess. Just kept forbidding his gabbro (which he seemed to like much better...) untill he had only raw adamantine  ::)
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Albedo

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Re: Lame artifacts!
« Reply #55 on: May 07, 2009, 02:02:08 am »

Not the lamest artifact (because altho' it's a toy and made of wood, it's worth over 7k), but perhaps the lamest depiction on one:

"...On the item is an image of a dwarf and dwarves in Chestnut.  The dwarf is surrounded by the dwarves."

Yeah, not a whole lot has happened at this fortress yet.  ::)
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Nerserus

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Re: Lame artifacts!
« Reply #56 on: May 07, 2009, 03:38:09 am »

Not the lamest artifact (because altho' it's a toy and made of wood, it's worth over 7k), but perhaps the lamest depiction on one:

"...On the item is an image of a dwarf and dwarves in Chestnut.  The dwarf is surrounded by the dwarves."

Yeah, not a whole lot has happened at this fortress yet.  ::)
Thats usually something to do with like, ascension to being the leader or something like that. Someone drew the mayor surrounded by toads. The mayor is horrified.
What a masculine image for Dwarves everywhere. :D
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stack of 10 prepared dragonfly brains - I'm trying to imagine what's more funny: a dwarf popping a tiny dragonfly brain into his mouth for a snack, the butcher who actually prepared this feast, or the brave hunter who ventured out into the wilderness and returned with this bounty.

JimiD

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Re: Lame artifacts!
« Reply #57 on: May 08, 2009, 06:14:05 pm »

And now, I didnt think it was possible, but...

"Healedbook the Paddle of Dividing", a green glass bed.



From a possesion, so no useful skill either.

Worth a nice 118,800 dwarfbucks.  Might be going into my nobles quarters then...

It forms a nice set with the Silver Bucket, turtle shell ring, copper trumpet, gem, Mica Idol, mug, quern, idol, mini forge and donkey leather trousers (see epic artifact thread...)

Sorry about the wide image, I dont have any image programs on this PC.
« Last Edit: May 08, 2009, 06:16:04 pm by JimiD »
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Albedo

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Re: Lame artifacts!
« Reply #58 on: May 08, 2009, 09:33:49 pm »

(How is a bed worth 1/8 meg DB's even close to "lame"???  Didn't you want the "best artifact ever" thread? Sheesh.)   ::)
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Teferi

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Re: Lame artifacts!
« Reply #59 on: May 09, 2009, 12:51:08 am »

I think you want the Epic Artifacts thread for that awesome bed.
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I think it'd be better to just throw him in a pit.
By pit I mean "ledge designated as pit some 30 levels above the ground water magma" and that would,as they say be the end of that.
Unless a sword/axedwarf gets to 'em.. then it's rhesus pieces...
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