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Author Topic: Lame artifacts!  (Read 56090 times)

Grendus

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Re: Lame artifacts!
« Reply #195 on: February 16, 2010, 12:30:24 pm »

I keep getting floodgates. Floodgates are laaame, I've yet to see a dwarf actually admire them.

Worst was a ring made out of a single chunk of non-economic rock. I've gotten a lot of those actually. Worse, I refuse to use stonecrafting, so even the fey moods don't do anything for me. Laaame.

Had a migrant armorsmith go secretive, made a steel shoe! Laaame.

Had four children in a row get possessed and make stone or wood crafts. Laaame.
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madjoe5

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Re: Lame artifacts!
« Reply #196 on: February 16, 2010, 04:35:31 pm »

I agree. Even though I do use various crafting skill, its always wood that gets a mood. I hate that, since I usually don't have enough wood for a decent wood crafting economy, or I get a stone artifact, bringing my high master stone crafter to legendary. Big whoop.

sunshaker

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Re: Lame artifacts!
« Reply #197 on: February 18, 2010, 12:43:44 pm »

Not so much Lame as just disappointing.

Code: [Select]
Thilsegavuz "Tarnishmined" a Zinc Spear

This is a Zinc Spear. All craftsdwarfship is of the highest quality. It is decorated with goblin bone and encircled with bands of Fortification agate. This object menaces with spikes of Zinc. 8,400db.

I had Iron and Steel bars, but no Mr. Weaponsmith wants Zinc. It isn't bad, and he did get legendary from it so I can make better stuff, it just isn't as good as it could have been, especially since Mr. Weaponsmith likes Steel (and Spears)...
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Caesar

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Re: Lame artifacts!
« Reply #198 on: February 18, 2010, 12:48:28 pm »

Not so much Lame as just disappointing.

Code: [Select]
Thilsegavuz "Tarnishmined" a Zinc Spear

This is a Zinc Spear. All craftsdwarfship is of the highest quality. It is decorated with goblin bone and encircled with bands of Fortification agate. This object menaces with spikes of Zinc. 8,400db.

I had Iron and Steel bars, but no Mr. Weaponsmith wants Zinc. It isn't bad, and he did get legendary from it so I can make better stuff, it just isn't as good as it could have been, especially since Mr. Weaponsmith likes Steel (and Spears)...

You should have forbidden all the other metals in his vicinity.
So it's entirely your fault, as dwarfs, those 'intelligent' little fellows, need 'some' guidance.
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sunshaker

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Re: Lame artifacts!
« Reply #199 on: February 18, 2010, 01:15:27 pm »

You should have forbidden all the other metals in his vicinity.
So it's entirely your fault, as dwarfs, those 'intelligent' little fellows, need 'some' guidance.

I consider that cheating and don't do it. Though you are right I could have done that and had a better artifact.
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Awayfarer

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Re: Lame artifacts!
« Reply #200 on: February 18, 2010, 02:20:15 pm »

Think I've trotted this story out here before, but I once had a fort where the first four moods netted me three legendary bows, and thereby three legendary bowyers.

I forget what the fourth one was, but I'm tempted to say it was a blowgun.
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"The ale barrel is over there. There is a dwarf in it."
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Buddybud

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Re: Lame artifacts!
« Reply #201 on: February 18, 2010, 03:21:20 pm »

In my latest fortress, i've had 8 artifacts so far. 3 have been quite appreciated but the remaining 5 are a joke...lets see..
1. a cave spider silk vest
2. a pig tail vest
3. a limestone didgeridoo
4. a rabbit leather shoe
5. a turtle bone mask

The amusing thing is that i recently slaughtered an Orc Axe Lord. He had a masterful Great axe. Strangely on the axe was an image of my pig tail vest artifact.....so apparently someone likes my lame ass artifacts :P
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Legendary_Catsmith

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Re: Lame artifacts!
« Reply #202 on: February 18, 2010, 05:06:48 pm »

My first artifact ever was a Pine amulet that menaced with spikes of Pine and was ringed with bands of Pine.  I hated this piece of crap, right up until a kobold stole it - at which point I raged hard and went on a kobold-slaying RAMPAGE.
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Numbnuts

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Re: Lame artifacts!
« Reply #203 on: February 18, 2010, 05:59:26 pm »

A piccolo. It took the guy five logs. To make a PICCOLO. YAY DWARVEN EFFICIENCY!

Update: Someone just made an artifact Mechanism. What. The hell.
« Last Edit: February 18, 2010, 06:10:00 pm by Numbnuts »
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RandomNumberGenerator

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Re: Lame artifacts!
« Reply #204 on: February 18, 2010, 06:24:56 pm »

Update: Someone just made an artifact Mechanism. What. The hell.

Those are very useful. Stick them in a weapon trap with 10 weapons. Even no-quality wood or glass will kill or severely wound almost anything. Since it's an artifact, it will almost never jam.
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wormplayer

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Re: Lame artifacts!
« Reply #205 on: February 18, 2010, 07:15:21 pm »

On the other side of the spectrum, I once got an EMERALD TABLE.

That's right, a table made from solid emerald. Makes me feel like I'm in the Wizard of Oz.
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RantingRodent

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Re: Lame artifacts!
« Reply #206 on: February 18, 2010, 09:27:30 pm »

Tosedbardum "Stopfights" a Willow chair

This is a Willow chair. All craftsdwarfship is of the highest quality. On the item is an image of Stopfights the Willow chair in Willow.


Useful, yes, but still lame.
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Exiledhero99

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Re: Lame artifacts!
« Reply #207 on: February 18, 2010, 09:45:40 pm »

Tosedbardum "Stopfights" a Willow chair

This is a Willow chair. All craftsdwarfship is of the highest quality. On the item is an image of Stopfights the Willow chair in Willow.


Useful, yes, but still lame.


isn't this a paradox from continued re-referece of itself?
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bmaczero

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Re: Lame artifacts!
« Reply #208 on: February 18, 2010, 09:52:44 pm »

I've had awesome artifacts on this fort (the first 10 included a barrel, a bin, three beds, a pair of coffins, and a statue).

I had to laugh at the artifact barrel, though, which is currently listed as
Wondrousdoused the Faces of Virtue, a Rendered Fat Barrel (Aluminum)

Stupid dwarves, why not use it for something awesome, like fire imp meat?
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Nyxalinth

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Re: Lame artifacts!
« Reply #209 on: February 19, 2010, 12:03:13 am »

I keep getting floodgates. Floodgates are laaame, I've yet to see a dwarf actually admire them.

Worst was a ring made out of a single chunk of non-economic rock. I've gotten a lot of those actually. Worse, I refuse to use stonecrafting, so even the fey moods don't do anything for me. Laaame.

Had a migrant armorsmith go secretive, made a steel shoe! Laaame.

Had four children in a row get possessed and make stone or wood crafts. Laaame.

I kept getting posessed children with Bone moods.
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