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[Areyar]

On a related note:
Dwarf infants don't know that rivers are not filled with booze.
or "Babies believe any liquid is booze".

[Rockphed]

Considering that the dwarven form of weaning is probably to take the baby and dunk it in a barrel of booze until it stops crying, I suspect that the first thought about liquids dwarven babies get is "liquid good."

[Captain Xenon]

when your miners discover a new feature, it will always be in the most inconvenient way possible.

when a feature with silk is discovered, you will have several dwarves run for it before you have looked to see if it is safe.

when a feature with bones is discovered, the dwarves will run to collect that refuse first, leaving the dead rat to stink up the booze stockpiles.
corollary- bones/shells/skulls are higher priority than anything that will rot and stink

the first time, you will be surprised. the second time, you will learn. the third time, you will find a new way to fail. this applies to everything.

if you have enough beds, then you need to dig more rooms. if you have enough rooms, then you need more wood for bins. If you have enough to trade, then you need more bins. if you have enough bins, you need more to trade.

you will strike gems or ore on the edge of your fancy well-planned room. now decide if you will dig em out, or engrave them.

a baby born next to a very deep pit will be born IN the deep pit. the birth/death will resolve at terminal velocity.

[Neruz]

Law Of Mining 1: YOU HAVE STRUCK MICROCLINE!
Law Of Mining 2: YOU HAVE STRUCK ORTHOCLASE!
Law Of Mining 3: YOU HAVE STRUCK ALUNITE!
Law Of Mining 4: YOU HAVE STRUCK MAGMA! Shiiii-

[Puck]

Law Of Mining 1: YOU HAVE STRUCK MICROCLINE!
Law Of Mining 2: YOU HAVE STRUCK MICROCLINE!
Law Of Mining 3: YOU HAVE STRUCK ALUNITE!
Law Of Mining 4: YOU HAVE STRUCK MICROCLINE
Law Of Mining 5: YOU HAVE STRUCK MICROCLINE!
Law Of Mining 6: YOU HAVE STRUCK MICROCLINE!
Law Of Mining 7: YOU HAVE STRUCK ALUNITE!
et cetera, et cetera, ad infinitum, ad absurdum

fixed

oh, and:

Whenever your new construction is about to be finished, and you don't know yet, whether it will work without killing everybody, and you just cannot wait to find out, you're literally dying of suspense, that's when the caravan will show up and the liaison will express their need to talk about thousands of things you just don't care about at that time.

They also will make sure to pause your game liberally, up to a point you want to smash their faces in. you might even designate an elaborate deathtrap to kill them off, because they are so annoying, but prepare to wait for the completion of the construction forever... because they will pause your game some more before anything gets done.

[Aldaris]

you will strike gems or ore on the edge of your fancy well-planned room. now decide if you will dig em out, or engrave them.

Suprised as I was at the time, I found out a few weeks ago that this is not always true, I once found an ore vein lining the edge of my dining room, and stopping exeactly where the designation stopped, well, OK 2 tiles stuck out, but I just added those on the other side of the hall to keep it symetrical.

[sluissa]

If you're going to at least smooth the room anyway, why not just dig it out and rewall it?

[InsanityPrelude]

Law of Naked Wrestling: There will always be clothes on the floor in your barracks.

Combine this with the Law of Fecundity and... 

[Sphalerite]

The likelyhood of the lever being pulled is inversely proportional to the urgency of that lever being pulled.

(I just learned the hard way that having an elaborate deathtrap protecting your fortress entrance that requires 7 separate levers to be pulled in the right order is not the best of ideas.  In the end I think more dwarves were killed by my defenses than by the goblins.)

[Neruz]

If you're going to at least smooth the room anyway, why not just dig it out and rewall it?

Because you can't engrave constructed walls?

[Grimlocke]

The law of socks: The recovery of the dead guys socks take priority over anything else. Be it the survival if the recovering dwarve, the infant she carries, or the whole fortress.

My first addition to this forum, cant believe it wasnt allready in this topic 

[Ampersand]

The Law of Insane Competence: The probability of a craftsdwarf going completely insane is proportional to the quality of it's work. That probability increases exponentially if that dwarf is a cook.

[Leafsnail]

- Your hunter will only decide to take on an alligator when he's down to his last bolt.
- Your dwarves will litter their bedroom with socks and shoes.  Even if their bedroom is only 2 squares big.
- Dwarves won't touch the copper dagger dropped by a kobold in the middle of your fortress, but if an orc drops a sock at the entrance during a raid...
- Carp are only awake when one of your troops are injured and all of the lakes have dried up.
- To some dwarves, the rocks are harder and better if they happen to be lying directly in front of a practising siege engine.

[ThtblovesDF]

Hmm about rocks... I am shooting my rocks 50 titles or so out the fort, against a wall and then they fall down into maga, however there is a group of dwarfs who are certain that only those rocks are worth being used and they will try to fetch them evry time -_-

[GoreTaco]

Law of Undead Elephants: They will kill exactly the dwarf you liked/needed the most, despite where they are.