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[Rorax]

Today I decided to challange my self and play on a Terrifying forest for the first time. It has river and lots of trees.
While I was happily creating the first inches of my fortress in the lovely blacksand top layer, I was thinking to my self "Hey Terrifying locations totally arn't that bad, so the entire forest is dead ashwood, so what!"

I then get the message "(tame) dog has died" And I'm thinking "Oooo! my first visitors" you see, I had a dog tied up outside as a early warning system, I then proceed to go see who is knocking at my door, and I see a familar fish symbol.

A horde, of this familar fish symbol.

I had forgotten that undead fish like to go for walks on land.

So I think "I can solve this" and unleash my pack of war dogs. who were quickly reduced to kibble.
So I think "I can rectify this!" and draft my dwarves and send them to beat back the advancing horde of fish. The dwarves it's safe to say were not the victors. with only one survivor that stumbled back to a bed.

I was horribly confused, why on earth were undead fish capable of such carnage?

So i finally decided to loo(k) at them. And suddenly, it was as if a fatherly hand rested on my shoulder to reassure me "It's ok, you never stood a chance" and lo! a great weight was lifted.

Carp.

Undead, Carp.

A horde of undead Carp.

[Fossaman]

So. I just learned that screw pumps will not push their output up to the surface of a large body of water; instead they just don't pump. I was rather disappointed with this, as it meant I had to redesign the drainage system for my water portcullis, and added a half hour to the fill time for my giant lake.

At least I discovered that windmills do work underwater, and the impassable square of a screw pump blocks water from above as well as the sides. That would have been a real facepalm if they hadn't.

EDIT: Okay, now I have a real facepalm. I just finished filling a rather large resevoir with water, right? So I decided it would be a laugh to introduce said water into my fort at high pressure, then process-kill to go back to before the carnage.

My autosave decided that this was a good time to overwrite my game. Now I'm back a year before I decided it would be fun to flood.

[TrueAnkh]

In my new fortress, I had a ridiculous chain of bad luck within about 10 minutes of each other.

It's 2 years in and the beginning of the third year in spring. My 33-dwarf fortress is doing fine, with making the barracks tower and the defensive moat/traps/defensive walls.

After a fey mood the year before which required absolutely no multitasking, the second one became possessed and clained a mason's workshop. First facepalm of the day came when I noticed that they say everything they need for their artifact in the Q menu. I only saw that he needed stone, so I used reveal (which is the only reason I had it on) to find what stone I didn't have.

All the stone I could see were mined somewhere else (not counting metal/ore/gems of course), but then I checked back and saw he needed cloth and gems.

Considering that every gem I could find with reveal was nowhere near anyplace already mined out and considering that he only got a stone and I have almost every cloth that I can import or know how to make, I simply labelled him as a lost cause and put my 3-man marksdwarf army to shoot him down when he'd go insane.

Somewhat later on, I decided to build a well. I already had the moat finished, so it was simple to channel some close to the main entrance. What I didn't consider, well...

Human caravans are at my trade depot, so I send my broker to go trade there. I check back to find out that he's not there. Guess where he is?

My trader is about to drown because of his own stupidity and I'm going to lose a legendary miner as well because of it.
And to add insult to injury, I wasted a lot of training time on my marksdwarves as the dwarf in a strange mood went stark raving mad, the harmless insanity.

Someone shoot me.

EDIT: I also can't get Dwarf Companion to work either... It would've helped me figure out what exactly he wanted.

[smjjames]

Yea, I had that happen once where I was channeling a brook or river or whatever and the liason decided it was a good idea to stand on the channel designation and so ended up falling into the river and drowned.

[Lord Shonus]

DC only works on Straight 40d, not the 40D# series. If you want to use it, you'll have to transfer your savr if you're using one of those.

[TwilightWalker]

DC only works on Straight 40d, not the 40D# series. If you want to use it, you'll have to transfer your savr if you're using one of those.

Might want to go check up on that...I have DC and 40d16, and it works just fine.

[Sphalerite]

DC does work with 40d#, provided you have the right version of DC.  Each revision of 40d# required an updates release to DC, so if you have an old version of DC you will need to upgrade.

[Safe-Keeper]

I've been demolishing walls to build fortifications for the longest time. I only recently discovered the "Carve fortifications" option.

Edit: That is, I always knew it was there, but it was only recently that I figured out it actually worked. Until I looked it up on the Wiki, I thought it was for digging fortifications out of rock (you know, like carving staircases and channels).

 

My trader is about to drown because of his own stupidity and I'm going to lose a legendary miner as well because of it.

You didn't have time to build an emergency staircase, and there was no way to dump the water by channel into a reservoir or anything?

[gopa4]

Not exactly your typical facepalm. So I build a flourishing thriving pulsing fort. I'm quiet proud of it, but after several years I grow bored. Turns out theres not a single animal on the map, with the every so often siege. So I decide to start my own Fun, I have around 20 or so captured goblins, 2 dragons, one who spawned incredibly injured, and one goblin macelord. I rig all of the cages up in my barracks, with a few in my dinning room. Thinking, hey I get to start my own tantrum spiral of death    . What I didn't take into account was my fortress/royal guard, who had been training for ages and had become legendary wrestlers and marksdwarves. They wipe out 19 goblins and both dragons, I imediately diactivate them, so all thats left is a goblin and the goblin mace lord. He ends up just scarying my dwarves and breaking a pinky. I drown the fort later for my cheated deaths.

[Euld]

Lost my immigrant cook, my first legendary miner, and a champion to a goblin ambush.  Another champion was injured and has gone to bed with one yellow wound.  All because I built an underground pathway to the mountains to a smidgen of forest, and the goblins finally got the sense to walk through it before the traps were up and before I could make set of decent armors for my dwarves.

Why do I always lost one of my seven first T.T

On the plus side, one of my living champions got a title, she is now known as 'El Death' Knifegrooved the Rhythmic Will of Sanctuary.  I typically give my military dwarves "El something" names.

[Sphalerite]

Today I discovered that dwarves will build floor adjacent to floor hatches, which will then collapse.  I knew this would happen with bridges, but didn't know it happened with floor hatches too, and so wasn't careful when building a complex system of floors and hatches to make sure everything was built in the right order.  The resulting cave-in punched through half a dozen levels of dining room and crafting hall, and was only stopped from reaching the cistern by a wall in just the right place.

[PhilbertFlange]

I had embarked on a nice shallow hills area with a half exposed magma pipe at the surface. After creating a nice deep fortress, I decided to expand my magma forges area to add about 5 glass furnaces. I start channeling away the ground and letting the magma flow into it (planning on covering most of it with flooring before putting the furnaces down).

About a minute after doing so, I start getting flooded with "dangerous terrain" messages. I check the specifics in the announcements to see the following:
Urist McChampionSwordsdwarf cancels spar: dangerous terrain x5
Urist McChampionHammerdwarf cancels spar: dangerous terrain x5
Urist McChampionAxedwarf cancels spar: dangerous terrain x5
Urist McChampionMacedwarf cancels spar: dangerous terrain x5
Urist McChampionCrossbowdwarf cancels shoot at archery range: dangerous terrain x5

Yeah, I had been running long enough that my military consisted of 25 squads of 5 champions in a different weapon, including 5 champion crossbow dwarves.

Turns out I had channeled over the edge of my archery range/barracks where all these off duty squads were practicing. Needless to say the few deaths from magma caused an instant tantrum spiral as my steel clad champions who were friends of the deceased proceeded to rip through the civilians in a few seconds. >_<

[InsanityPrelude]

One of my masons walled herself onto a ledge... right as a siege started. Since no one would deconstruct a piece of the fortification with orcs nearby, she died of thirst.

[Sutremaine]

At least I discovered that windmills do work underwater

This... I... I have no words.

[Tcei]

So I finaly found a new spot that Im happy with. Its a lake bordering a mounting. I have some very nice sheer cliffs to dig into, The only way to get to them, without digging down first of course was to go down to the narrow strech of land between the magma pipe and the lake and build a bridge to the wall. Did I mention that the denizens of said pipe are very edgy? They are.  After I channeled off the pipe I built a depot near by on the safe side of the channel and continued work on the bridge and getting my fort carved out. Up until this point I'd never had any issue at all between the magma creatures (holy cow firemen are fast!) and my dwarves, until the first caravan arives and sets up in my temporary depot.

 Apparently this one flame spider really really hates wagons, for it one-shotted one, thankfuly nothing caught on fire, but the rest of the caravan left. No big deal, I got some booze which I desperately needed and some other free stuff from the dead wagon, including a ton of steel armor and weapons. All goes well for about half a season. Then about 40 macaques arrive and swarm over where the dead wagon is/was and steal every last fricken piece of steal armor and weapon that dropped from the caravan...... Guess I forgot to make an armor and weapons stockpile -_-