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[zchris13]

How did your queen get legendary swimming?

[Hagadorn]

bitch started with it.

legendary ambusher, markswhore and socialite.

[zchris13]

bitch started with it.
legendary ambusher, markswhore and socialite.

She can screw you from a mile away!  You'll never even see her coming!

Ow, my humor.  I think it's broke.

[Untelligent]

I'm glad I follow the devlog regularily. When the mass-designate and mass-construction features were put in, I started using them as soon as they became available.


Anyways, in my current fort, I have a huge spiral staircase going up around the lower tower (some 20-30 z-levels) so that the caravan could climb it. I had some "support columns" on every level of the ramp put in for aesthetic purposes.

Much later, as I was moving my dwarves and fortress from the base camp to the tower inside the mountain, I realized that the faux supports would make the 5-tile wide hallways too narrow for the caravans to pass through, rendering the entire rampway completely useless for its original purpose. I didn't want to dig out the columns because they looked cool, so I had to put the depot at the bottom of the tower instead of between the two. *facepalm*

[Horpach]

Flooded my fortress.

I was struck with the idea to make a beautiful waterfall in my entrance hall to generate happy thoughts (and because I can do it).
Worked into screw pump function and build a multilevel building for generating energy via windmills and a long  aqueduct from the brook to a point over my entrance hall. Under my entrance hall is a tunnel running from the brook to the several wells in my fortress, as part of my water distribution system. I dug a 2 tile wide channel from the entrance hall into this tunnel, and build grates over it, so the water from the waterfall could flow away.
Or so I thought.

Construction of the whole thingy took several months. Finally I was able to activate the screw pumps and watch my masterplan fulfil. It worked fine. My dwarfes admired the waterfall.

Several seconds later, I got warning messages concerning dangerous terrain. 

Well, the water from the waterfall didn't flow away through the already filled water distribution tunnels, but instead overflow and flooded everything.
Of course, the first room flooded was my control room with all the levers which start/stop the pumps.


In the aftermath, it is perfectly obvious for me. The water tunnel was already at 7/7, so it couldn't take more water.

[NFossil]

When I discovered I could colour-code workshops.

How? *facepalm*

[Untelligent]

When I discovered I could colour-code workshops.

How? *facepalm*

Build them out of rocks with the color you want. For example, Microcline, a light blue rock, makes light blue workshops. Alunite, Granite, and Mica make white, light grey, and dark grey workshops, respectively. Build your butchery shop out of kaolinite or bauxite to get a blood-red slaughterhouse.

[Captain Xenon]

i just noticed..... my Hammerer is married to my Tax Collector... and they had a son. this.... wait, can i cut down on rooms now? huh. yup, half the space... wonder how long they will spend moving the scattered items from their floors now...

[kuribo]

Well, I had a guy out hunting. He sees a sturgeon in a murky pool and he falls in, to his death.

No big deal, right?

Except the sturgeon lies in wait and as four more dwarves come to claim his body, the sturgeon attacks them, killing them.

What really sucks is that I was semi-afk at the time and when I came back, it took some finding but eventually I came to the murky pool surrounded by viscera and dwarven corpses.

I think I'll just let the others try and claim the bodies.

Edit: 14 dwarves, 1 sturgeon, and the poor beared fellas are rotting both in the pool and surrounding it. The Sturgeon is now known as Nobangsezuk Sedishgast. Only one dwarf lives, the former clerk. The other survivor went mad and was crushed by a stone trap. I think I'll let the last guy die off, then go into adventure mode and try to avenge them.

Edit: And just when I thought that last guy would be the sole survivor, he dives in to reclaim some riches. 15 Dwarves killed by one fish.

[kingpocky]

I JUST figured out that you can use the "page up" and "page down" keys in the Units menu and Trade screen and several other places. That's on the level with learning to press shift while moving and learning about the mass forbid menu.

[kuribo]

Sweet mother of God! I just arrived in adventure mode and the sturgeon is still spitting out bits of dwarf!

[GoneWacko]

Sweet mother of God! I just arrived in adventure mode and the sturgeon is still spitting out bits of dwarf!

That is, in a word, epic.

[kuribo]

Sweet mother of God! I just arrived in adventure mode and the sturgeon is still spitting out bits of dwarf!

That is, in a word, epic.

You'd think so, but look what happened next:



I think I'll collect the corpses of my fallen dwarves and drop them in what used to be the tombs.

[Incendax]

I've had a few facepalms, including discovering Shift + Enter for building materials, Shift + Arrow for moving around the screen, and Mass Forbid/Dump menu.

But the single biggest Facepalm I really deserved was when I decided to avoid Cave Adaptation by building a 5x5 Stairwell with a 3x3 skylight in the center penetrating every level of my fortress. I figured this would force the dwarves to get some sunlight whenever they wanted to go to sleep, eat, drink, party.

I know what you're thinking. No, it was well defended against Goblin Attacks. When the Goblins did come, however, my designation of Only Soldiers Go Outside in response ground my entire fortress to a halt as nobody would step foot on those stairs. Nothing I could do would ever unmark those stairs as not being 'Above Ground'.

[kaypy]

Just now: "Oh, thats right, *that* lever stops the goblins escaping. *This* is the one that would have stopped them getting in- *thats* why nothing was happening no matter how many times I marked that one 'pull'"

But I was too busy dealing with a sudden and unexpected melee to actually facepalm. Thank Armok for hammertrained marksdwarves!

This picture reminds me of Curtin universities architecture Department Building...

(I predict all of... 2 people getting that)

...ok #2 here... although thankfully I've mostly stuck to the 'tamer' areas of Curtin and only heard tales of the wierder parts...

...Is anyone else suddenly struck with an urge to recreate their campus/office/neighborhood in DF?...