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[VerdantSF]

I just had another wtf moment
I embarked on the beach and in the winter.... the FCKING OCEAN FREEZES
not believing the OCEAN would freeze, I had not set up my defense to protect from OCEAN based attacks

Heh, I did the same thing on my first beachside embark.  Fun times.

[muffins]

Not even two full years into my fortress. The only metal available was copper, so I was fitting out my single militia squad with copper hammers and armour. My hunters were hunting elephants and bringing in ridiculous amounts of food for my fortress. They had over 800 elephant meat alone stockpiled, for a fortress of just 57 dwarves. I had them butcher the things outside to prevent miasma appearing.

Then a necromancer turned up and I suddenly had undead elephant skeletons running around and killing things outside.

I had no drawbridge, traps or defences other than the dogs and that one squad of hammer dwarves. So I sent them out to try and kill the Necromancer. The undead elephants, and everything they had killed, just swarmed my squad and killed all but one dwarf.

I'd only made enough weapons and armour for that one squad, who were now undead, so the three squads I put together with everyone still alive were unarmed. I threw them at the necromancer in a desperate attempt to kill him before the undead elephants and undead militia wiped everyone out, but they didn't even manage to exit the fortress. There was just so much bad stuff coming down that passageway. I lost a whole fortress in minutes because one guy resurrected my refuse.

[Mr Space Cat]

That's why I dig out an area underground to store my refuse pile and assign the pile to also accept corpses. Then adjust (o)rders so that dwarves will gather corpses left outside. Helps keep the outdoors slightly more pretty.

[Aslandus]

Not even two full years into my fortress. The only metal available was copper, so I was fitting out my single militia squad with copper hammers and armour.

Aw man, you have copper? I just got my second caravan, and still only have nickel and a little bit of platinum to show for it, those I only just found. On the other hand, I've created an army's worth of wooden crossbows...

[Aslandus]

I accidentally built a statue in front of the only entrance to one section of my fortress, didn't realize I had done it until the two dwarves stuck on the other side starved to death...

[the1337doofus]

Not even two full years into my fortress. The only metal available was copper, so I was fitting out my single militia squad with copper hammers and armour. My hunters were hunting elephants and bringing in ridiculous amounts of food for my fortress. They had over 800 elephant meat alone stockpiled, for a fortress of just 57 dwarves. I had them butcher the things outside to prevent miasma appearing.

Then a necromancer turned up and I suddenly had undead elephant skeletons running around and killing things outside.

I had no drawbridge, traps or defences other than the dogs and that one squad of hammer dwarves. So I sent them out to try and kill the Necromancer. The undead elephants, and everything they had killed, just swarmed my squad and killed all but one dwarf.

I'd only made enough weapons and armour for that one squad, who were now undead, so the three squads I put together with everyone still alive were unarmed. I threw them at the necromancer in a desperate attempt to kill him before the undead elephants and undead militia wiped everyone out, but they didn't even manage to exit the fortress. There was just so much bad stuff coming down that passageway. I lost a whole fortress in minutes because one guy resurrected my refuse.

Undead elephant skeletons...... mother of Armok.....

I was in the middle of a mass smoothing project, and I was cheating by superdwarfing everyone, because smoothing is BOOOOORIIIIIING.
I had no idea fastdwarf existed until yesterday.

[Drecon]

The moment I realized why only half of my animals were being milked.
I actually spent years agonizing over what I was doing wrong. Tried to search for bugs, searched the wiki... and then it hit me.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

For those who didn't catch on: Only female creatures can be milked.

[PDF urist master]

males can be milked too. it just doesn't taste good.

[oldark]

- dwarf fortress should introduce a prosthetics system.... dwarf lost hand - gains claw attatchment
dwarf loses leg - gains sword attatchment - dwarf has puntured lung - gets wooden artificial breathalizer
dwarf loses other leg - gets wheel chair attachment

Can you mod crutches to semi-simulate this? Not sure how possible it may be to do more with modding.

[fricy]

males can be milked too. it just doesn't taste good.

Spoiler: NSFW (click to show/hide)

You mean like...?

Can you mod crutches to semi-simulate this? Not sure how possible it may be to do more with modding.

This science project says crutches cannot be modded, however "special" dwarves are awesome. Great read!

[muffins]

I walled off a forgotten beast in the first set of caves and built an elaborate beastie delivery system with drawbridges etc so I could have him path to the surface during a siege (for giggles) without killing any dwarves. Or at least I thought I'd walled him off. Turns out that diagonal travel includes upwards to the next z-level.

5 dwarves dead and my main crafting hall is now filled with webs.

Edit - and just moments after I kill the damn thing and my mason completes the artifact he was working on. A shale coffin.

[Doktoro Reichard]

I walled off a forgotten beast in the first set of caves and built an elaborate beastie delivery system with drawbridges etc so I could have him path to the surface during a siege (for giggles) without killing any dwarves. Or at least I thought I'd walled him off. Turns out that diagonal travel includes upwards to the next z-level.

Just had a similar situation, but replace forgotten beast with clowns. I was building my top of the line shooting range and was picking up the candy cane by designating up/down stairs. When Urist McMiner finally opened the circus door, the clowns came rushing in into the shooting range. My engineers didn't pay much attention and continued shooting, killing half...
... except some were mysteriously disappearing and instead were flooding the magma sea. Only by reading this did I realize that my design leaked clowns.

[ColdOneK]

Quote~oldark~
({"Can you mod crutches to semi-simulate this? Not sure how possible it may be to do more with modding."})

I'm not someone to ask about modding related info lol
would be kinda awesome though

Hell I'm struggling to set up a proper cloth industry, and until today, I'd though for sure that to make glass items, first you'd have to make rough glass
this, as it turns out, is bunk
you just need sand...
now I have crap tons of green glass, and every migrant wave I've been getting have been melee military dwarves with lvl 3 in some weap.
and it'd be one hell of a waste to not set up a badass 50 dwarf melee squad of legendaries
Full hammer with extra from my marksdwarves that don't bother to use their archery targets
missing 2 axe
missing 3 spear
4 sword
1 mace

only problem is that I need to import iron + steel and I keep getting sieged, and I think they realize my only entrance is a tad...dangerous cuz they just stand around like I'll go to them or something

[MerkerBenson]

DEDICATION: after a gruesome battle with some goblins in which he nearly lost his right foot, his left foot is torn open, and he lost so much blood a pool was left where he had stood for several weeks out in the cold, the speardwarf Zon Ablellurit got up, filled his waterskin, then went to do some combat drills, with his remaining foot still cut wide open and hopping on it..... after all this...he has been fine lately since he has a room adorned with cool engravings by our resident "Engravelord"... he is a tough dwarf

PS: Now he's leading dodging demonstrations, teaching the others how to dodge on one leg, a true master
He is not using any crutches and constantly leading drills!!?! How is this even possible lol, I know he's tough, but still....The other dude who just had his arm injured and a rib cracked is still lying on the battlefield lol

[PDF urist master]

what are his attributes?