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[Joben]

I just lost two dwarves, with several more injured, to falling worn out clothing.

I have a new micro trash pit, one square channeled out with only diagonal access so dwarves pitch stuff down into it and miasma can't get out.

I forgot to deactivate the zone before ordering the retrieval of some worthwhile items that had gotten in there.

So some hapless haulers head on down and their buddies happily pitched worn out socks and elk legs and such onto their heads.

[Cheesoburgor]

as a noob i made all my dorfs seperate bedrooms since they were whining about it and guess what, vampires

[Scruffy]

I just lost two dwarves, with several more injured, to falling worn out clothing.

I have a new micro trash pit, one square channeled out with only diagonal access so dwarves pitch stuff down into it and miasma can't get out.

I forgot to deactivate the zone before ordering the retrieval of some worthwhile items that had gotten in there.

So some hapless haulers head on down and their buddies happily pitched worn out socks and elk legs and such onto their heads.

Heh, I just had a similar thing happen to me. I was digging a well (30z from top to botton)  next to my main staircase and after finishing I ordered all the stones to be dumped so they wouldn't be left in the bottom of the cistern. Soon bodies started building up in the bottom.. Yep, 3 dead and 2 wounded hailers later I realized that the only available garbage dump was next to the very same pit around 20z higher.

[Mura]

I tried to set up a minecart repeater in my last fortress using a novel (read: buggy) design, but after many problems trying to drop the minecart onto the track from above, finally decided to have a sacrificial dwarf go and push it instead to jumpstart the process. I then unpaused the game and busied myself checking on some crundles who were lingering near my cage traps.

The first dwarf went to go push the minecart. It accelerated as planned, reversed direction as planned, and mowed him over before he could move an inch, grievously injuring the poor sap. Then another dwarf decided to go "recover the wounded" and walked right into the high-speed minecart as it ran him over a third time, bowling her over as well. Then someone decided to go rescue her... This blossomed into thirty dwarves out of fifty dying in the accidental meatgrinder.

At least, that's how I reconstructed the scene after finding a ceiling-high pile of bodies in the minecart oscillator.  Never again shall I leave the game unattended.

[Nexusv]

"Oh right, water has pressure..."
Meeting hall, workshops, and stockpiles flooded.

[thegoatgod_pan]

A child matured into adulthood just as I was setting up a fort military. On a whim I made him the commander (all others are threshers/fishermen amyway). Next thing i see he is caught up in a romance.

At 12.

His lover -lover!- is 17.  And also in the military. In fact they just started training together.

I guess making him the commander gave him a little too much confidence. Armok they grow up fast.

[Rvlion]

Having a dwarf in bed for months due to a broken lower spine (after he has some !fun! with a stray Lama)...

Untill he got a strange mood...

After which he suddenly stepped out of bed, stole some bars and gems and started a mysterious construction...

In the end I got a nice copper mail shirt named Dishmabseng Inolanriz, Rampartrung the Yellow Sky.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

This is a copper mail shirt. All craftdwarfship is of the highest quality. This object is adorned with hanging rings of rose quartz. On the item is an image of Rampartrung the Yellow Sky the copper mail shirt in copper.

Of course the moody dwarf had himself carried back to bed to rest untill eternity.

[Cheesoburgor]

Having a dwarf in bed for months due to a broken lower spine (after he has some !fun! with a stray Lama)...

Untill he got a strange mood...

After which he suddenly stepped out of bed, stole some bars and gems and started a mysterious construction...

In the end I got a nice copper mail shirt named Dishmabseng Inolanriz, Rampartrung the Yellow Sky.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

This is a copper mail shirt. All craftdwarfship is of the highest quality. This object is adorned with hanging rings of rose quartz. On the item is an image of Rampartrung the Yellow Sky the copper mail shirt in copper.

Of course the moody dwarf had himself carried back to bed to rest untill eternity.

ITS A MIRACLE!!!

[Blackadder]

I just finished outfitting my military, when a few snatchers stopped by. The first one was torn apart by a serrated disc, the second was caught and later dumped into my killing pit. The last one, however, was shot nearly to death by a hunter who just happened by, but unfortunately, fell asleep after scoring only two hits, and ended up being stabbed in the gut for it.

[weenog]

Having a dwarf in bed for months due to a broken lower spine (after he has some !fun! with a stray Lama)...

Untill he got a strange mood...

After which he suddenly stepped out of bed, stole some bars and gems and started a mysterious construction...

In the end I got a nice copper mail shirt named Dishmabseng Inolanriz, Rampartrung the Yellow Sky.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

This is a copper mail shirt. All craftdwarfship is of the highest quality. This object is adorned with hanging rings of rose quartz. On the item is an image of Rampartrung the Yellow Sky the copper mail shirt in copper.

Of course the moody dwarf had himself carried back to bed to rest untill eternity.

Unless that was a possessed mood, I say start making plans and preparations to capture the next were-thing that turns up, and then get this guy bitten.  Set up a nice isolated forge, living quarters and dining area for him, and maybe a fountain and/or statue garden to keep him happy.  Drop materials, food, drink, and occasional new clothing in through a hole in the ceiling, and finished products out through a hole in the floor.  Either tell the other dwarves he's living cloistered for religious reasons, or tell them he's become paranoid and reclusive as the madness of genius.

[Blackadder]

 

Meanwhile, in Dwarf Fortress...

Edit: And just in time, I topped my own facepalm. Elves just saved my fortress from an invasion. After my military was somehow obliterated, the elven caravan guards just murdered every last goblin without breaking a sweat.

I think I'll retire as overseer now.

[sir_schwick]

I tried to set up a minecart repeater in my last fortress using a novel (read: buggy) design, but after many problems trying to drop the minecart onto the track from above, finally decided to have a sacrificial dwarf go and push it instead to jumpstart the process. I then unpaused the game and busied myself checking on some crundles who were lingering near my cage traps.

The first dwarf went to go push the minecart. It accelerated as planned, reversed direction as planned, and mowed him over before he could move an inch, grievously injuring the poor sap. Then another dwarf decided to go "recover the wounded" and walked right into the high-speed minecart as it ran him over a third time, bowling her over as well. Then someone decided to go rescue her... This blossomed into thirty dwarves out of fifty dying in the accidental meatgrinder.

At least, that's how I reconstructed the scene after finding a ceiling-high pile of bodies in the minecart oscillator.  Never again shall I leave the game unattended.

You just discovered how to create an efficient Immigration Bureau!  Just seal up the "Job Assignment" track once done with an immigration wave.

-------------------------

In Masterworks I embarked with tons of galena and an Armor Savant.  This lead to a ridiculous Silver Padded Leggins export industry that allowed me to buy a Hellfire turret.  Which I deployed on top of my outdoor battlements.  One buzzard later the entire forest valley is on fire and racing toward my gates.  Actually gets in, but somehow my hens and geese are not harmed at all.

[Xob Ludosmbax]

Having a dwarf in bed for months due to a broken lower spine (after he has some !fun! with a stray Lama)...

Untill he got a strange mood...

After which he suddenly stepped out of bed, stole some bars and gems and started a mysterious construction...

In the end I got a nice copper mail shirt named Dishmabseng Inolanriz, Rampartrung the Yellow Sky.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

This is a copper mail shirt. All craftdwarfship is of the highest quality. This object is adorned with hanging rings of rose quartz. On the item is an image of Rampartrung the Yellow Sky the copper mail shirt in copper.

Of course the moody dwarf had himself carried back to bed to rest untill eternity.

ITS A MIRACLE!!!

I had the same thing happen with a vampire.  Only, he left the hospital to feed, and had to be carried back... 

[Smashness]

Playing as a fire-breathing dwarf with wings of flesh, I decided to prey on some bandits. One shot me with a crossbow, hit me in the left wing, snapped a bone and I fell unconscious. They then proceeded to beat me to death...

[Dr House]

Had a 100+ Fortress filled with friendly dwarves.
Had my first goblin siege, cool stuff, was hopping to get some experience for my mili dorfs.
Had a hallway full of stone fall traps, and decided to put the dorfs on stand on the other side of the hallway (So, the goblins would trigger the traps and be easy prey to my fully copper armoured dorfs.
Between those, was a married dorf, with a wife and kids.
So, the goblins came. I saw the first few backing off and bone and blood all over the walls. Good stoffs.
Then, a goblin pikeman charges, passes all the traps and triggers most of them, get's hit by all sorts of stone, runs up to my married dorf and sticks the Pike up my dwarf's brain.

So, the sh** and my brain fused together, and bodyslammed the fan.

His wife tantrums, and thou begins the infamous tantrum spiral.
Fortress crumbled One hour Later.