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[Pukako]

Burrow down to find shiny stuff - find it! Praise the Miners.

Then blame the miners who tunnel into magma, and then all die before I can get any shiny stuff....

Blame me, as I don't really know how to work DFliquids, and the replacement miners drown before being consumed by magma.  Throw in the start of a tantrum spiral, a Vile Force of Darkness, an out-of-date warren, and 105 dwarves are now down to 50 in a little over 6 minutes.

Wow... 37...

[B4brilliant]

I accidentally promoted my legendary swordsdwarf to captain of the guard in my last fort. I had never had one, and had started ignoring mandates 3 years prior. He immediately started administering "beatings" with his *adamantine shortsword* starting in a dining hall where a wedding was taking place. body parts flying everywhere before I figured out what was going on. D'oh

[Doradan]

Not even 10 minutes into my very first game (earlier this evening in fact) and I realized that I had put my dorfs right next to a goblin fortress... I didn't even have time to figure out how to move those damn yaks and wagons into the little navel i had carved into the side of a hill...

[bobhayes]

I accidentally promoted my legendary swordsdwarf to captain of the guard in my last fort. I had never had one, and had started ignoring mandates 3 years prior. He immediately started administering "beatings" with his *adamantine shortsword* starting in a dining hall where a wedding was taking place. body parts flying everywhere before I figured out what was going on. D'oh

Beautiful. I can't wait to see the engravings of Urist McJobshirker being decapitated at the wedding.

[B4brilliant]

I accidentally promoted my legendary swordsdwarf to captain of the guard in my last fort. I had never had one, and had started ignoring mandates 3 years prior. He immediately started administering "beatings" with his *adamantine shortsword* starting in a dining hall where a wedding was taking place. body parts flying everywhere before I figured out what was going on. D'oh

Beautiful. I can't wait to see the engravings of Urist McJobshirker being decapitated at the wedding.

Oh there won't be any. He didn't stop immediately after I moved him to a different squad, so much death. eventually he took over a craft workshop and started demanding nonexistent shells or something. went Beserk, killed my military of 25 and all 30ish dwarfs I could throw at him who weren't tantruming/crying in their rooms/generally being crazy. eventually i locked him in a room with an intended victim, set everyone to mining and managed to channel the volcano into the room with him with some migrants who weren't quite insane yet.

I abandoned as eventuallyall of my last 5 dwarfs were lying legless in a stairwell being gnawed to death by drunians.

[bobhayes]

Oh there won't be any. He didn't stop immediately after I moved him to a different squad, so much death. eventually he took over a craft workshop and started demanding nonexistent shells or something. went Beserk, killed my military of 25 and all 30ish dwarfs I could throw at him who weren't tantruming/crying in their rooms/generally being crazy. eventually i locked him in a room with an intended victim, set everyone to mining and managed to channel the volcano into the room with him with some migrants who weren't quite insane yet.

I abandoned as eventuallyall of my last 5 dwarfs were lying legless in a stairwell being gnawed to death by drunians.

Best wedding ever!

[jaxy15]

Axedorf was fighting a gazelle and dodged into a river.
He drowned.

[Greiger]

Modded carnivore race needs [NO_EAT][NO_DRINK] to survive worldgen.  Been playing a fortress for 3 years wondering why nobody ever used the dining room before I realize that I forgot to comment it out in the save before actually playing.

[Doradan]

After finally getting my act together, I've put together a good start to a fortress... except when i accidentally strand my two miners down a z-level, and they can't mine their way back up, and they have both of the picks i brought with me with them, so yeah... re-load time.

Again.

I'm having lots of Fun now.

[bobhayes]

After finally getting my act together, I've put together a good start to a fortress... except when i accidentally strand my two miners down a z-level, and they can't mine their way back up, and they have both of the picks i brought with me with them, so yeah... re-load time.

Barring some very weird geography, that should not be possible.

[Argonnek]

A while ago, I really, really needed booze and couldn't make enough to satisfy my thirsty dwarves. I resolved to buy out the caravan, but couldn't remember what they asked for the previous year. (I obsess over what I trade, making sure I give them what they ordered.)

So I'm scrambling to remember what they wanted, scepters? chains? prepared meals? I then check the civ screen, hit tab to get to the trade deals section, and I hit enter. It showed me the screen of what they ordered. It was so obvious that I literally smacked myself.

[Jeoshua]

Wondering why my dwarven atom smasher isn't working... then realizing there is such a thing as a "retractable bridge" and a "raisable bridge"

 

[varnish]

You'd think I'd have learned by now that you shouldn't have a dwarf channel out the space directly beneath where he's standing... when the next tile is about 6 z-levels down.

One memorial slab, coming right up.

[Greiger]

Tried to throw a giant bat down my goblin execution pit.

Hint: It didn't work.

P.S. And then the damn thing manages to completely outmanuver my entire military and flee the map.

[Samuel]

"The Forgotten Beast Aste has come! a gigantic three-eyed hummingbird. It has a short horn and it squirms and fidgits. It's lavender blush feathers are patchy. Beware its poisonous bite!"

A big, purple hummingbird with three eyes. I'm not surprised it hasn't earned a longer name. It's too embaressed to show it's face to anybody.