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Author Topic: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress  (Read 2136691 times)

Captain Insano

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #3120 on: November 22, 2010, 12:35:48 am »

So I had to register to respond to this.

I just came across something... Rather strange.

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"Welcome to the fort, Migrants" *SLAM* "Welcome to the fort, Migrants" *SLAM* "Welcome to the fort, Migrants" *SLAM*

Wolfhound

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #3121 on: November 22, 2010, 08:15:32 am »

I was building a large stone piston to transport magma from the sea up about 120 z-levels to my fort.
There were caverns in the way so I made one piston that went from below the 2nd cavern to the sea, bypassing the 3rd cavern.

Next I started to build the 2nd piston that should bypass the 2nd caver. (The 1st one was directly below my fort so I decided to use pumps for the last few z-levels).

Facepalm nr. 1 came when I found out that the supposedly free chunk of undiscovered space contained hidden part of the cavern system.
Facepalm nr. 2 came when I realized that I carved the magma reservoir for the 2nd piston so bad that the piston cave-in would not only fall to the reservoir, displacing magma up, but it would break throug the reservoir floor into the 3rd layer of caverns that were directly below...
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Musashi

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #3122 on: November 22, 2010, 08:26:50 am »

Nobody will give water to the dehydrated patients, among which an axedwarf who only has a broken arm. I have no idea what is it exactly that everyone is doing with the goddamned buckets. *facepalms*

EDIT:
OH FOR FUCK'S SAKE
the burrow was somehow still in application despite having disabled the alert. Had to delete it to allow everyone to move.
« Last Edit: November 22, 2010, 08:35:14 am by Musashi »
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I don't mean to alarm you, but it appears that your Dwarves are all in fact elephants.

Orkel

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #3123 on: November 22, 2010, 10:15:31 am »

My bone carver got stabbed in the lung, and while he was walking to the hospital it healed and he went "o nevermind" and went off to work.
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Quote from: madjoe5
Dwarf Fortress: The game in which people place abducted children in a furnace to see what happens.

Knarfle

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #3124 on: November 22, 2010, 04:44:26 pm »

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What do you get when a Rhesus monkey steps on a weapons trap loaded with maximum adamantine blades?

Rhesus Pieces!

Musashi

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #3125 on: November 22, 2010, 05:22:21 pm »

[/snip]
That's what I call a frontstab.
"You got blood on my tunic."
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I don't mean to alarm you, but it appears that your Dwarves are all in fact elephants.

GaxkangtheUnbound

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #3126 on: November 22, 2010, 05:39:10 pm »

Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Looks like the broker. . .
 8)
. . .made the deal of his life.
YEEEEAAAHHH!
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Proud of my heritage.
Prepare to lose your sanity.

proxn_punkd

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #3127 on: November 22, 2010, 05:50:57 pm »

The panic, the bloodshed, the tantrums, the !!FUN!!. So, are horses overpowered?

Horses are quite overpowered, undead even more so. So you've got twice the fun.
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atomicthumbs

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #3128 on: November 22, 2010, 06:59:54 pm »



What font is that, and does it have quality symbols?
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glopso

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #3129 on: November 22, 2010, 09:19:53 pm »

I designated the rectangle of land above my meeting area to be channeled. The dwarf digging it out dug it in the special inefficient way that dwarves just loooove to dig in, causing a cave-in. It killed two puppies and severely (actually it's fatal, since I have no thread, cloth, soap, or sources of unfrozen water. But I do have 30 bags of gypsum powder) injured a gem cutter dwarf, who was useless anyway since I wasn't finding too many gems.
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Samuel

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #3130 on: November 23, 2010, 01:05:21 am »

Apparently, when you tell your military dwarves to use a spear, you need to specify that they shouldn't take a training spear into actual combat.

I figured, well, at least he managed to stop the kobold from getting off the map while the dwarves with actual weapons showed up.

So I got three dwarves wailing on the kobold, one with an iron pick, one with a steel short sword, and one with a wooden training spear.

Guess who get's the kill?

...I'm still giving him a proper weapon before he gets attached to the thing.
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kardwill

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #3131 on: November 23, 2010, 03:59:01 am »

Winter 258. A balista and my drawbridge have been destroyed, along with a patch of wood and a crossbowman, during a dragon incident. Dragon get caught in a anti-wolf, kitten-baited cage trap. I rebuild the bridge. End of story.

Not.

Spring 259. 60 goblin tourists mounted on giant rats and cave crocodiles come to visit my citadel, along with their 7 troll friends. I sound the alarm, send 2 crossbow squads in the barbacane, man the balistas, and order my civilians to close the front door drawbridge and the tradehouse drawbridge.

"Ouch, 3 crossbowmen down. This goblin marksman is lethal. OK, I'll order the others inside."
"Err, what are these goblins and crocodiles doing in the courtyard, cutting down my retreating crossbowmen? Why is the rest of the goblin/troll army making a beeline to my frontdoor? Ack, WHY IS THIS DRAWBRIDGE OPEN?

I forgot to link the new drawbridge to the lever.

A heroic counter attack by the rest of my military managed to push back the goblin onslaught, but the price was heavy.
- 8 killed (3 of which drowned in the moat during the fight to take back the drawbridge.)
- 12 wounded, clutering most beds in my hospital. I think most of them will die from infections, while my 8 members, full time medical team is busy plundering the corpses of the fallen soldiers.
- Water in the lower levels of the fortress (I tried to drain the moat into the cistern to get to the corpses of 3 fallen dwarves. They were drained into the cistern along with my chief medical dwarf who tried to plunder them. Their corpses are now festering in the water reserve. And the polluted water overflowed and spilled out of my wells.)

Polishedmirror's military has been crippled.
On the other hand, I'm proud of the little guys. They managed to push back those invaders without help (few traps, almost no warbeasts on site - the dog cages had not been linked to a lever either), and protected the fortress from the CF I caused. No small feat when their overseer is, well, me.
« Last Edit: November 23, 2010, 04:42:38 pm by kardwill »
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Zrk2

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #3132 on: November 23, 2010, 08:44:09 pm »

Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Looks like the broker. . .
 8)
. . .made the deal of his life.
YEEEEAAAHHH!

People in English class do that everyday. I am going to come through the internet and punch you.
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He's just keeping up with the Cardassians.

Zidane

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #3133 on: November 23, 2010, 11:57:54 pm »

Finished building a curtain wall, made of different patterns of kimberlite, and bauxite. I took me about an hour to do it... then dorffort decided to crash.
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Give cats natural metallic armor and throw them in your danger room.  Also allow their mouth and tail to grasp (shield in mouth, weapon in tail xD)  Have a cat based military.  You know, do the same with all tame animals xD send in the cats as shock troops to disrupt the archers

EmeraldWind

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #3134 on: November 24, 2010, 02:52:57 am »

I like to name my first seven dwarves in themes.  I picked the seven colors of the rainbow this time. For fun I named their group Rainbow the Perfect Diamond.  I realize the rainbow thing sounds elven, but I couldn't think of any other themes for my first seven. I continued the motif with the first couple migrants... because I got such a low number... so I had a bunch of colors...

I've been looking at statues to see if the dwarves decide to make an image of my legendary hero adventurer... and find a statue of Dakas the god of rainbows. Turns out about 3/4 of my fort worship the god of rainbows.  I facepalmed at the irony.

I never really met for the fort to end up like this.  I figured though, that I'm just going to roll with the irony.  I want to build a giant rainbow over my fort now... though I'll have to change the colors in StoneSense to get some of the colors to look right. 

A more traditional facepalm also happened at the fort. We got ambushed by goblins. My first experience with them as I was using .13 until .17 came out and my second fort died rather fast when a giant purple feathered hedgehog that breathed fire decided to explore my fort.  Luckily, only two dwarves died... my military decided to attack them when all I wanted them to do was run.  I just formed the military and they had no weapons.  The liaison finally had the last meeting with the expedition leader and decided to leave... about 15 seconds too soon. He got gobbed... hard... then the goblins decided to storm my cage trap hallway... so I have like 19 goblins in cages.  I kind of wish I could enslave them... even if all they did was haul and clean... I'd be fine with that... But I guess I should figure out something to do with them... I got an idea... how much water is needed to freeze someone to death.  :P
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We do not suffer from insanity. We enjoy every single bit of it.
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