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Author Topic: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress  (Read 2137436 times)

Sutremaine

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #1170 on: February 22, 2010, 07:27:42 pm »

Hmm... if you quote that, you might want to modify it a little [with brackets] to make sure that the idea that the arms were still detached from the body got through.
We-ell, I do think it's pretty clear from the original text, as the head has already been mentioned as separated and the only reason to mention specific body parts is if they're separated too [/excessive analysis]. If anyone gets curious about it, I can always explain.
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I am trying to make chickens lay bees as eggs. So far it only produces a single "Tame Small Creature" when a hen lays bees.
Honestly at the time, I didn't see what could go wrong with crowding 80 military Dwarves into a small room with a necromancer for the purpose of making bacon.

Jacob/Lee

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #1171 on: February 22, 2010, 09:07:52 pm »

I thought I could charge 3 goblin crossbowmen with an army of champions.
Damn was I wrong.


I also thought I could have a giant hall of traps would stop DD orcs and that a real military was useless.
Damn was I wrong again.

Lord Shonus

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #1172 on: February 23, 2010, 05:11:25 am »

I've spent the 4 Dwarven years trying to figure out why my depot was not getting access. I paved a road, clear cut trees, smoothed boulders, carved ramps, did everything I could think of. Then I read on the forums that the depot access map starts at the actual building. Checking this revealed that wagons can't go over stairs, not even horizontally. *facepalm*
Although, oddly enough, they can pass over ramps even if the lower part of the ramp isn't next to a wall.

From what I understand this can also result in wagons lighting on fire if there is magma behind a wall that they go down via ramp.   Generally this goes unnoticed until dwarves finish bringing stuff to the depot which lights them on fire and they decide they need a drink.

So that's why the wagons kept leaving on fire but the dwarves didn't catch. I didn't worry about it too much becuse they only ignited on the way out and left the map before dyiong.
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On Giant In the Playground and Something Awful I am Gnoman.
Man, ninja'd by a potentially inebriated Lord Shonus. I was gonna say to burn it.

Dendou

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #1173 on: February 24, 2010, 12:35:32 pm »

I was gettin' pretty board with how easy vanilla DF (all my forts die to boredom :P) was so I decided to upgrade to Dig deeper.  I had heard of how tough orcs were and wanted to try my luck against them.  But I wanted to maximize the Fun potential and make sure it would be tough so I modded orcs to come in with full adamantine gear.  I embark on a great site and spring goes by everything's going great, magma forge is filling, farm is up, trade depot is built and goods are mostly ready, butchery is up, prison is under construction, rooms are finished, dorfs are ecstatic.  Then comes summer.  I figure I'll start working on making some armour for my troops so that once I have a high enough popolation I can defend myself from these adamantine orcs, "A vile force of darkness has arrived!"  Orcs come now, I haven't even had my first caravan yet.  I scramble my defenses, get a makeshift ballistae battery at the end of my entry hall, pull in my anti-theft dogs, station 2 lightly armoured wrestlers (I refuse to use marksdorfs, standard traps, and atom smashers).  My ballistae take out most of them and my wrestlers/dogs manage to flatten the last one (thoroughly impressing me).  I have one injured dorf and thast's it, halelujah!.  Then autum, waiting for my caravan so I can get an anvil and, "a vile force of darkness has arrived", now two squads.  I use crazy tactics involving mining behind enemy lines and rapid channel digging and manage to avert disaster.  2 dorfs dead. 2 injured, 1 champion.  2 dorfs left to hold the fort.  I decide I need some balance to this facepalm so I save that fort and create another ine.  But this time I make my suedo adamantine cheap and embark with one full set.    Summer comes same as last, one squad siege and I survive unscathed.  I remember that I have an HFS on this map and, having never hit one before, decide that breaking it could be Fun. 
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
  Tantrum spiral ensues.  I tryto build a legendary dining hall as fast as I can to avert disaster but it is autumn now and with autumn comes, :a vile force of darkness has arrived".  Armok damn it!  I don't know what was killing my fort faster, my dorfs or the orcs.  ANywho, in comes the reclamation force of 14 dorfs.  I come to kill off the orc infestation and suffer just one death.  And all is well, fort is saved, I still have my suedo adamantine armour so I should be fine.  Odd thing is, since I broke the HFS
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
  So, with friendly orcs in my fort Autumn comes and with it "a vile force of blah blah blah".  Only not blah blah blah because within seconds I have dozens of war dog died and urist mcsuprise died.  My "friendly orcs decided to join their bretherin and kill me from within, only , for some reason, I can't kill them.  Maybe vanilla DF wasn't so bad...Nah
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Lord Shonus

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #1174 on: February 24, 2010, 09:55:59 pm »

That's a known bug. Invaders left on your map onreclaim will be friendly until their civ sieges again.
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On Giant In the Playground and Something Awful I am Gnoman.
Man, ninja'd by a potentially inebriated Lord Shonus. I was gonna say to burn it.

Rat Of Wisdom

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #1175 on: February 25, 2010, 10:35:51 am »

Fuck, I hate these stupid little bastards so much right now.

"Orders from above, Urist. We gotta stack all the specially-constructed magnetite mechanisms near the generator site so the mechanics won't have to walk so far. Just stick the ones with a purple smear on them in the dump zone up there."

"ROGER WILCO MOTHER FUCKER"

*Urist McFuckingRetard fetches a mechanism from the legendary dwarves' complex below and brings it to the top of the fort*

"DURR HURR HAY GUISE THAR APPEARZ TO BE EMPTY SPACE NEXT TO THIS HERE DUMP ZONE"

*Urist McFuckingRetard proceeds to dump every goddamn mechanism (four hundred of them) into my perpetual motion machine*

"HURR DURR WORK'S DONE BOSS CAN I HAS ☼DWARVEN CHEEZ ROAST☼ NAO"

I can't type anymore. I can't see my keyboard because the facepalm knocked out my goddamn eyes. Especially because I've fucking had this problem before.

Toady:

For Armok's sake, add an option to dump zones to ignore adjacent pits.
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Evidently, Dorf Philosopher Uristmedes only figured out the Uristmedes screw. And he ran around naked and covered in water, blood, and vomit all the time, so any discoveries made in his 4/7 bathtub went unnoticed by dorf science.

SpiredWarrior

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #1176 on: February 25, 2010, 11:24:36 am »

I had one when I learned that I was on the wrong rock layer to actually get stone. I was at ground level in a cliff I didn't know was a cliff, and thought I was underground. ._.
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Asatruer

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #1177 on: February 25, 2010, 11:46:47 am »

After playing for close to two years off and on I just found out about when placing furniture (and such) you can hit x to see the individual items...  I have wasted so much energy building special stockpiles limited to certain qualities just to make sure my more worthy (and Noble) dwarfs got the high class things they deserve... oh the embarrassment...  At least I knew about mass designation for dumping and such.
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darthbob88

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #1178 on: February 25, 2010, 11:51:55 am »

Much like Rat's problem three posts up. I'd made a dump zone in my magma-working room, so I could clear all the rock out of what would become a magma reservoir under the forges, smelters, and furnaces. I left the zone in place after I sent the magma down the sluices, and channeled a hole where I'd put a smelter/furnace some time later. Between channeling the hole and building the smelter over it, I ordered some iron armor "seized" and dumped from the human caravan, so I could melt it. Apparently the dwarfs decided to take it down to the nearest dump zone, in the magma room, and then noticed the pit nearby. "By Armok!" they said in their peculiarly dwarven fashion, "here is a pit, over magma no less, and I have items for dumping. I should dump these items in the pit!" Thus did I lose three or four bars of iron and steel.
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Psychoceramics

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #1179 on: February 25, 2010, 04:44:57 pm »

orcs came in winter of first year. My defenses were not ready. Luckily, most of them hit the bridge trap and are now waiting patiently for the inevitable drowning. I just need to get the pump stack working.

I lost everyone but 3 dwarves. A child, a bedridden miner, and a carpenter, who now has every labor assigned.

And then the miner went insane. And not melancholy or just speaking gibberish. He's gone into a berzerker rage. So now he's chasing the carpenter, the kid, and my two animals, hobbling around on his one good leg. Luckily the fort is mostly circular, so they can get away forever.

Oh wait, he cornered the donkey. And got his face kicked in by said donkey.

two dwarves, one of which is a child. And that child is still fan-freaking-tastic.

edit: the carpenter just went insane. Just gone mad though, so I'll just need to wait for a) the kid to grow up, or b) migrants!

edit: and now a snatcher just made off the with kid! jebus!
« Last Edit: February 25, 2010, 05:01:30 pm by Psychoceramics »
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Hazelnut

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #1180 on: February 26, 2010, 06:47:38 am »

I'm having an awful time with the same problem as in this thread: http://www.bay12games.com/forum/index.php?topic=50098.0

I have a magma pipe that is 5 embark tiles east and one south from my fort. Long way away. And I can only move it deep down below the valley with a brook running inbetween. At first I though this wouldn't be a problem - I'll just cut a 3 wide pipe with smoothed corners for ease of flow (makes it wider, d'oh) and be patient waiting for it to fill a 10x15x1 cistern near my fort that I could then tap into whenever I needed magma. After reading that thread (and testing it) I realised it wouldn't work, so I built a wall right down the middle of the pipe so I have both a 1 wide magma pipe and an access tunnel. Then I put a pump in to manually pump the magma into my cistern. Creating the pump took ages to build because I was being sieged by humans, as their caravan had a disagreement with the local CGS, and have no military yet - so just had the drawbridge up. Meant I was short on wood, so I only wanted to use minimum charcoal and the smith kept cancelling the pipe section. Made it out of glass in the end after months of faffing. Still no idea why with 3 bars and 4 charcoal it couldn't be made.

So channelled the source hole and installed the pump. Got it wrong because I channelled out the wall of the magma pipe behind the fortification I'd originally cut for the 3 wide pipe. So magma starts crawling down the channel. (at least I'd walled off the access tunnel correctly) Fine I thought - just a head start. So I build the pump and start pumping, hardly anything happens. I'm assuming that it simply goes back into the magma pipe though the fortification... facepalm. Unless it's just impossible to fill a distant magma chamber with a single manual source pump?

While doing this I take my eye off my other pump that's filling an irrigation chamber the other side of the map at the underground river - my only glassmaker drowns though blowback I guess. Arrggh.

Not sure how I'm going to proceed yet...
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Sutremaine

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #1181 on: February 26, 2010, 08:08:39 am »

Unless it's just impossible to fill a distant magma chamber with a single manual source pump?
It's not impossible. Pumped magma acts like water in that anything added to the output tile of the pump will teleport where it can if the output tile is at 7/7, which results in an even flow of magma as long as the pump is in operation.
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I am trying to make chickens lay bees as eggs. So far it only produces a single "Tame Small Creature" when a hen lays bees.
Honestly at the time, I didn't see what could go wrong with crowding 80 military Dwarves into a small room with a necromancer for the purpose of making bacon.

Hazelnut

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #1182 on: February 26, 2010, 09:15:50 am »

Unless it's just impossible to fill a distant magma chamber with a single manual source pump?
It's not impossible. Pumped magma acts like water in that anything added to the output tile of the pump will teleport where it can if the output tile is at 7/7, which results in an even flow of magma as long as the pump is in operation.

So it's just the path back into the magma pipe then? Crap - it would have been so easy to remove the fortification and build a wall.  ::)  Does the # of z levels of magma below the pump intake make any difference?
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Morgus

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #1183 on: February 26, 2010, 11:03:06 am »

Unless it's just impossible to fill a distant magma chamber with a single manual source pump?
It's not impossible. Pumped magma acts like water in that anything added to the output tile of the pump will teleport where it can if the output tile is at 7/7, which results in an even flow of magma as long as the pump is in operation.
So it's just the path back into the magma pipe then? Crap - it would have been so easy to remove the fortification and build a wall.  ::)  Does the # of z levels of magma below the pump intake make any difference?
Nope
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Because it's so amusing to hear stories of the last recruit, pressganged into defending the fortress, making the critical shot that saves all the battle-hardened veterans... then going crazy because the cats have filled the dining room with miasma.

Reese

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #1184 on: February 26, 2010, 04:28:17 pm »

edit: and now a snatcher just made off the with kid! jebus!

Now I'm curious, at what point did your fort crumble to its end? when the snatcher grabbed the kid, or did he have to make it off the map as you watched helplessly?

Or did the game somehow fail to crumble because your last dorf was merely abducted?
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All glory to the Hypno-Toady!
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