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[NW_Kohaku]

My first fort.  So I'm setting up my new dungeon master's pad.  I'm engraving everything, which is total overkill, anyway, but it's smooth wall, and I have a legendary engraver sitting on his thumbs, so why not?

Then a goblin seige hits.  Not a big one, they aren't even capable of passing the first three tiles of standard traps, of which I have 15 before they get to the smasher bridge in my (fully engraved) hallway, then the hall of spikes.  I don't even bother putting my military on active duty.

I hit the "All dwarves inside" button, and everyone dutifully scurries inside, while spamming my message box with job cancellations because I was doing a major greenhouse building project.  (With statue gardens, a lake, and enough space to get some above-ground trees growing "underground", and generally set up a permanent underground lifestyle. Hateful sun!)

So anyway, I watch, slightly bemused, as the goblins slowly trundle towards certain death, wondering if I should flip the drawbridge lever that would fling them in to my fortress, just so I can kill them all, when all of a sudden, my legendary engraver comes RUNNING OUT OF THE FORTRESS, DIRECTLY INTO THE GOBLIN HORDE[/b].  It seems that I had forgotten to lock him in the room when I had told him to engrave, so he had somehow gotten it in his thick skull to run outside in the middle of a seige when going outside was forbidden to engrave THE WRONG SIDE OF THE WALL.  He didn't even notice the goblins for some reason, although considering he didn't know what "Don't go outside" meant, that shouldn't be too surprising.  He almost literally threw himself on their spears.

After I was done screaming at my monitor (about 5 minutes) I just save-scummed that BS out of existence.  Things like that just don't happen.  I then had to put up with my mayor trying to hold meetings with the trade representative by running outside of her spacious office, taking a walk that lasts 5 dwarf days, to speak to the representative (still inside her office) from the cliff face outside her office (as I built it to have an impressive view with windows).  They would then, for no apparent reason, switch whether they would be outside or inside. EVERY SINGLE TIME THEY TRIED.  The mayor would then get thirsty or tired from all that unnecessary walking, or something, and would then go all the way back inside to her bed, only to go back outside and try again.

It made me weep bitter tears of frustration.

[Deimos56]

You could always have a (well guarded) door to the outside from the mayor's office that's forbidden unless there's meetings to be had.

[NW_Kohaku]

It would actually have been easier to have just removed all the ramps up the cliff face.  I actually selected the site because it was a sort of conical spike of mountain that grew up detached from the rest of the mountains, and my mayor's office was on the highest floor that had more than a couple tiles of "wall".  When I finished putting in all-window walls, it would have been like a Space Needle of natural stone, which would have been thematically quite cool, even if the dwarves wouldn't care.

As it stood, I just carved out some space a few floors down (made the space needle my countess's dining room), and put her office there, instead, where "misaimed" meetings would be held in her bedroom, instead.

[Jopax]

Well i seem to be cursed when it comes to finding features.My first fort including magma was going great, i had a dining room, some workshops and bedrooms it was all going great, untill i started to dig rooms for my other workshops, running into a magma pipe that sits directly under my dining room, then i had to replan half my fortress layout because of that.
My current fort was similar, i had built around an open magma pipe and was doing great, placed the bedrooms in the lower left corner of the map, in the meantime i was looking for the blasted UG river all over the map, guess where i found it, while i was expandimg my friggin bedroom.
And it is quite peculiar, it runs from the edge to end immidetly in a waterfall that goes nowhere, i dig under it, nothing but damp stone, i dig above it, nothing but gold, quite strange

[tomas1297]

My first fort.  So I'm setting up my new dungeon master's pad.

I see a future legendary DF player.

[CobaltKobold]

My first fort.  So I'm setting up my new dungeon master's pad.

I see a future legendary DF player.

I did that too.

[tomas1297]

My first fort.  So I'm setting up my new dungeon master's pad.

I see a future legendary DF player.

I did that too.

Yeah,but it's still a rare thing.And you already are a legendary DF player.

[CobaltKobold]

Yeah,but it's still a rare thing.And you already are a legendary DF player.

I'm blushing!

[Quantum Toast]

My first fort.  So I'm setting up my new dungeon master's pad.

I see a future legendary DF player.

Is that unusual, then?

[tomas1297]

My first fort.  So I'm setting up my new dungeon master's pad.

I see a future legendary DF player.

Is that unusual, then?

Most players mess up or give up on their first fort.DF takes a lot of time to learn.

[Karnewarrior]

yeah. my first fort was quickly abandoned as I belived I started on top of a cliff. And I caught on quickly! (Within 3 months of playing I was ready to get a baron.)

[Moontayle]

I've been toiling around for a few years without any significant action in terms of ambushes or sieges when I get the "Vile force of Darkness" message. Since I'm nowhere near set up to deal with even a starting siege, I order the dwarves inside and pull the bridge levers and decide to wait it out. I have very few operations going on outside besides the usual fishing and woodcutting so it wasn't going to interrupt things too much.  Except I had discovered a flaw in my magma pump system and needed to redo all the pumps to be magma-safe. Unfortunately, I had already walled off the pumps, including the one that had direct access to my gear and axle system. Without thinking, I unwalled the area and set the pump to be deconstructed. A few minutes later I'm sitting there watching the goblins come down the axle tunnel and literally facepalm as I realize what I've done. Luckily, goblins can be forced to run away and that's what happened as one of my Legendary Wrestlers/Master Macedwarf gets into the tunnel and starts whooping ass. He died from his injuries though but he turned back the tide of darkness so he got a nice tomb as a result.

[NW_Kohaku]

Well, I did spend like three days reading the wiki before I ever started making a fort, and I did multiple worldgens to find a perfect spot for my first fort (every feature), and I tried that Do-it-yourself no axe embark thing so I could get more metal ores, lumber, and food to start with, and I patterned out my living quarters and such before I really started working on the fort. 

Although in retrospect, I would have built my industrial areas more vertically if given another chance, so as to minimize hauling time, using B1 as a massive warehouse with down stairs leading to pods of workshops using similar resources (although I did wind up doing this more and more later).  Oh, and I definitely wouldn't wait for my Countess to have shown up before working on her rooms, and the spike chamber to cripple my hammerer.

I also would have just never tried making that massive waste-of-time greenhouse/underground park and wood farming site.  It's year five, and I've only JUST hit my magma pipe so I can get glass going.

[Dendou]

playing on the dwarf heaven map I'm planning on filling the pit with magma and having a clear glass sphere resting inside.  I floor off the entirety of the bottom level and then wall off my construction tunnel.  I am well aware of the dwarven habit of building things from the wrong side so I oversee the construction of the last segment of wall.  sure enough, the dwarf walls himself in.  No problem, I'll just order it deconstructed, as I do so the nincompoop falls asleep and now I have to wait for him to wake up before finishing the wall, though I'm tempted not to...

[CobaltKobold]

Well, I did spend like three days reading the wiki before I ever started making a fort, and I did multiple worldgens to find a perfect spot for my first fort (every feature), and I tried that Do-it-yourself no axe embark thing so I could get more metal ores, lumber, and food to start with, and I patterned out my living quarters and such before I really started working on the fort. 

Yeah, reading the tutorials, THEN embarking makes for most things good.

Though I don't tend to have good bedroom-access design still, and practically botched the defenses on my first fort, as well as making a significant number of nobletraps that didn't function because one stands on levers instead of next to. (being able to make that would make deathchambers much more easy, since you could actually guarantee the noble be on the bridge/grate/spike without tricks, and just set Pull-R and they'll impale themselves...though, being able to build other stuff with the lever would be a way, too- wall-mount lever?