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Author Topic: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress  (Read 2142277 times)

Paaaad

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8895 on: October 04, 2014, 02:55:03 pm »

In Adventure Mode:

Dwarf Speardwarf: I yield! I yield!
Dwarf Speardwarf has bled to death.

Same guy, both messages on screen at the same time.
He made his peace with his God(s)

Also, the log updates every time you move, not as it happens.

Except I was the reason he was bleeding out, and they were the only messages on the screen.
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pisskop

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8896 on: October 04, 2014, 03:04:10 pm »

You move approximately once every ten ticks, in the average unburdened character.  He said that stuff and died within about 10 clicks.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WqvNWga_qLk

LOL @ Samuel Jackson and Damien's despised mother.

« Last Edit: October 04, 2014, 03:05:57 pm by pisskop »
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Rose

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8897 on: October 05, 2014, 11:21:00 am »

Interestingly, the log in stonesense updates as it happens, rather than when the in game one does. I'm not sure if that counts as a bug or a feature.
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PDF urist master

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8898 on: October 05, 2014, 03:18:10 pm »

In Adventure Mode:

Dwarf Speardwarf: I yield! I yield!
Dwarf Speardwarf has bled to death.

Same guy, both messages on screen at the same time.
He made his peace with his God(s)

Also, the log updates every time you move, not as it happens.

Except I was the reason he was bleeding out, and they were the only messages on the screen.

so you were raff the sweetling. pray for mercy my child.
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khearn

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8899 on: October 07, 2014, 10:59:24 pm »

I'm watching my mechanic slowly carry a rock across the fort instead of building the mechanisms I desperately need, when my view is suddenly yanked back up to the bedroom level, where my weaponsmith has been possessed.

Well, at least I can get a decent weapon out of it. I go to the stocks and forbid all of my bars except for steel. He takes over the forge and I wait for him to go grab a steel bar to make a great artifact.

He just sits there.

Huh?

Oh no, don't tell me...

I check his preferences... He likes aluminum. *facepalm*

I'm going to get an artifact aluminum weapon. And being a possession, that's all I'll get.

   Keith

Edit: Sosadnakas, "Ivoryenjoys", a[sic] aluminum spear. This is a aluminum spear. All craftsdwarfship is of the highest quality, It is studded with aluminum. This object menaces with spikes of rhyolite.

Not only is it a worthless waste of a mood, but it's also boring.

Lamest.

Artifact.

Evah.
« Last Edit: October 07, 2014, 11:07:11 pm by khearn »
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Thisfox

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8900 on: October 08, 2014, 05:47:19 am »

Not only is it a worthless waste of a mood, but it's also boring.

Lamest.

Artifact.

Evah.

No, the lamest artifact ever is a migrant soapmaker who arrived, possessed as soon as he could, and made me a leather amulet with cloth decorations, then remembered nothing.

Or the child who made a fabric bracelet. Great. I got a friendship-band-making kid. How is that artifact-worthy?

Plus someone I knew got not one, not two, but three goddamn crowns in the same fort. One of them was pretty spectacular though, menacing with spikes and bearing a picture of the latest enemy on it. But still... who needs artifact crowns?

...gods above, I wish dwarfs could wear some of the jewelry, honestly... It would be great to satisfy nobles in that way.
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Tacomagic

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8901 on: October 08, 2014, 09:04:40 am »

Ash* bracelet with carbachons of ash.  No engravings or depictions.  Worth 1200 urist.

*The wood.
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pisskop

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8902 on: October 08, 2014, 10:10:23 am »

You know what is pretty tough for me in adventure mode, this new version?  Night Horrors (Ñ).  Have consistently killed me or forced me into retreat (usually with grievous wounds while it murders the last of my companions).

This one wrecked my companions after we stumbled upon its lair.  I fled before he even finished with them.  Maybe Ill save it the trouble of tracking me down and kill myself now.
« Last Edit: October 08, 2014, 10:13:27 am by pisskop »
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drealmerz7 - pk was supreme pick for traitor too I think, and because of how it all is and pk is he is just feeding into the trollfucking so well.
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khearn

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8903 on: October 08, 2014, 02:03:52 pm »

But when a soaper or a child gets taken by a mood, you don't expect anything useful from it. You know it will be crap, so getting a cloth bracelet or leather amulet is no letdown. Sure it's lame, but you knew it was going to be lame.

When a weaponsmith gets a mood, even a possession, you expect to get something useful, especially if you have some steel bars lying around. When I saw that it was my weaponsmith who got a mood, I hoped to get an artifact steel battle axe and a legendary weaponsmith. Instead I ended up with a tin-foil spear and a weaponsmith who is still just "skilled". :-P

   Keith
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Thisfox

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8904 on: October 08, 2014, 07:50:55 pm »

I do imagine that the Soapmaker in question was a really annoying dwarf to migrate with. "Hey, I have this really amazing idea for an amulet... I keep dreaming of  of leather..."

...actually I guess not so much annoying as creepy. "You're not in what you might call a macabre state of mind, are you Urist? No? Gooood... Just checking. Chin up, mate, we'll get to the fort soon..."
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Mules gotta spleen. Dwarfs gotta eat.
Thisfox likes aquifers, olivine, Forgotten Beasts for their imagination, & dorfs for their stupidity. She prefers to consume gin & tonic. She absolutely detests Facebook.
"Urist McMason died out of pure spite to make you wonder why he was suddenly dead"
Oh god... Plump Helmet Man Mimes!

Max™

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8905 on: October 09, 2014, 11:49:12 am »

I think that's supposed to be a butchers shop, and the fun of having yak parts come to life and attack you.

You, sir, are a winner. *clap, clap, clap*
Hah, forgot I posted that.

Sadly I recognized it from having done this... once...

...and then again shortly after...

and then again after building cage traps but forgetting to build cages...

and then again in a new fort.

*sigh*
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Parhelion

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8906 on: October 09, 2014, 03:34:13 pm »

Not only is it a worthless waste of a mood, but it's also boring.

Lamest.

Artifact.

Evah.

No, the lamest artifact ever is a migrant soapmaker who arrived, possessed as soon as he could, and made me a leather amulet with cloth decorations, then remembered nothing.

Or the child who made a fabric bracelet. Great. I got a friendship-band-making kid. How is that artifact-worthy?

Plus someone I knew got not one, not two, but three goddamn crowns in the same fort. One of them was pretty spectacular though, menacing with spikes and bearing a picture of the latest enemy on it. But still... who needs artifact crowns?

...gods above, I wish dwarfs could wear some of the jewelry, honestly... It would be great to satisfy nobles in that way.

Can't you at least force some dwarves to wear the crowns, though, by assigning it as equipment in military?

Yeah, yeah, I know 'steel helmets rule dawg', but I rather like the idea of my dwarves heroically storming out of the ground following their bone-crown-sporting Fearless Leader. 
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§k

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8907 on: October 09, 2014, 09:58:19 pm »

Jewelry is not included in military equippment. However, if a dwarf comes with a crown, and he has a chest in bedroom, he may store it there.

Besides, the baroness in my current fort wears a green tourmaline flask, which can be considered as a kind of decorative jewelry.
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Max™

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8908 on: October 09, 2014, 10:09:22 pm »

You can try forceequip i b m HD while you have the crown highlighted I think?
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BirdBrainf4

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8909 on: October 12, 2014, 02:07:42 am »

So I was doing fine, had begun to set up my main workshops, and created a bridge access to my fort so that I could prevent sieges (got burned by a siege on the last fort really quickly, since I had not yet focused on a military).  Well, I was getting continual commands that my expedition leader was cancelling orders, so finally I take a look.  I realize that I have created his room's access on the other side of the bridge.  So...I dig out a part of the wall so I can get him access...but yeah, the goblins figure that out really fast.  Bye bye fort.
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