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Author Topic: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress  (Read 2142034 times)

Wirevix

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6030 on: March 27, 2012, 08:45:50 pm »

Trying to learn how to get through aquifers through the cave-in-plug method.  That's almost a facepalm right there, as I am terrible at comprehending three dimensional space and make horrendous mistakes in basic operations all the time.

Attempt #1: Okay, I have it all dug out, collapse it!  ...What do you mean it didn't go deep enough?  But... but I don't have anymore z-levels to make it taller...

Attempt #2: The badgers are a nuisance but I can't let them delay my plans!  ...Both the miners are missing?  Well, where did they go?  What do you mean last seen channeling over the aquifer?  ...Badgers...! 

Attempt #3: I can't find an aquifer.  I've hit the second cavern layer.  Where is the aquifer!  Aaauugh!

Attempt #4: Okay.  Time to collapse the plug!  ...Why didn't it fall?  I don't understand.  Cave-ins are turned on.  Why is plug not falling!  What is it attached to?!  Blrrgghhh...

Attempt #5: Once again, the aquifer is hidden from sight.  I guess it must be in a corner or something.  I can't find the stupid thing.
« Last Edit: March 27, 2012, 08:48:16 pm by Wirevix »
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In other news, the trees in my game can have invisible sex.

Bartinyou

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6031 on: March 27, 2012, 10:02:03 pm »

Urist Mcminer: Sir, We have found magma, steel production can commence momentarily!

          A Giant Flying Beast made of Bronze has come, beware his Poisonous Breath!

Urist McExpeditionLeader:  Have we completed sealing the stairway into the caverns with sealed Hatch Covers?!?

Urist McMason:  Was I suppose to be working on those hatch covers?  I was busy picking mushrooms.
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Garath

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6032 on: March 28, 2012, 08:32:22 am »

Damp stone this far underground? and it's stone, not sand or anything. Wait, didn't I remove al Aquifer tags? must be a false report.


status report: So yes, puddingstone, which doesn't form layers, has aquifer too and I only removed the tags from layer materials. Great. Savescum and safe aquifer breaching training! yay for me!.
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Quote from: Urist Imiknorris
Jam a door with its corpse and let all the goblins in. Hey, nobody said it had to be a weapon against your enemies.
Quote from: Frogwarrior
And then everyone melted.

FrisianDude

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6033 on: March 28, 2012, 09:26:40 am »

Damp stone this far underground?
I'd have assumed underground sea.
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A tiny, foul-tempered humanoid creature that dwells in the evil mountains. They are known to enjoy drinking liquor and will take any unguarded supplies of booze.

Garath

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6034 on: March 28, 2012, 11:19:44 am »

Damp stone this far underground?
I'd have assumed underground sea.

I thought so too at first, but then I found the first cavern layer a few levels lower. Guess I should count myself lucky thatthe cavern were not directly below or it would have been full of water.
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Quote from: Urist Imiknorris
Jam a door with its corpse and let all the goblins in. Hey, nobody said it had to be a weapon against your enemies.
Quote from: Frogwarrior
And then everyone melted.

Kogut

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6035 on: March 28, 2012, 12:04:31 pm »

"The merchants fromMong Spore have embarked on their journey."
"'Armorer, 7' Legonoshorast, Armorer is taken by a fey mood!"
"'Armorer, 7' Legonoshorast has claimed a Metalsmith's Forge."
"Armorer, 7 Legonoshorast screams <I must have copper bars!>"
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The worst bug - 34.11 poll
Tired of going decades without goblin sieges? Try The Fortress Defense Mod
Kogut, the Bugfixes apostle of Bay12forum. Every posts he makes he preaches about the evil of Bugs.

Count Dorku

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6036 on: March 28, 2012, 02:43:26 pm »

On the 40d game I'm playing just to get back in a dwarfing mood for when I install v2012:

Me: Hmm, we seem to be running low on booze. I should probably set some people to brew it.
[Urist McAdmin cancels Brew: no barrels]
Me: OK, so build some more...hang on. I know WHY they're hauling them over to the food stockpile; what I want to know is why they need ALL of them.

I assume the conversation went much like:

Urist McAdmin: Uh, I need that barrel to brew alcohol.
Bomrek McHauler: Nope! We need to stick fish in it.
Urist: Well, Dodok McCarpenter is working on another one..do you think I could have-
Bomrek: FISH
Urist: But just one-
Bomrek: FISH
Urist: What are you, a carp sympathiser?

Also, Safari spellcheck informs me that Urist, Bomrek and Dodok are spelling errors, but McProfession is perfectly fine. The more you know.
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"when in doubt, Magma"

Miners are diggin out nicely, everything will go right, i hope. hell, what am i even saying? this is dwarf fortress. it wont go right.

Pare

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6037 on: March 29, 2012, 01:33:00 am »

I started a new fortress in 34.06 - it was my fourth one, had a couple in 31.25 and one in 34.05 which I abandoned because of a new version (and because it wasn't going well).

First facepalm was that I did start looking for water and nice underground farm plot areas too early, without making an underground storage area. The coati men killed a dog and prevented the dwarfs from getting to the stuff in the outside stockpile - until I recruited the woodcutter to the militia. He got them all soon enough.

That was the small facepalm. The larger one came when I tried to build the well. I have an aquifer, and it's possible to dig around it, as I have a mountain biome which doesn't have the aquifer, so I can easily dig to the side. As I want a well, I decided to dig a small cistern and fill it from the aquifer.

Now, usually I have dug the cisterns as rectangular multi-level rooms. A friend gave me the advice that I could dig an inverted pyramid, with slopes on all sides so that the dwarfs can even climb out of the pit, so I proceeded to do that.

Of course, without thinking about it too much, I designated the whole pit at once, from the top down. The last parts to be dug were, obviously, the ones on the topmost layer. For some reason both my miners (I had two, two picks and had had three immigrants to the fortress at this point, so 10 dwarfs) got to the process of finishing that top layer.

For some reason they both were either on the slab when it fell down or under it. *double facepalm*

Result: both miners dead, at the bottom of a pit. Apparently the cave-in removed the slope at the bottom so I couldn't get to it, and I couldn't figure out how to build ladders there.

Luckily the caravan arrived soon enough and I realized I had more than enough tetrahedrite to forge a new pick, so apart from a couple of tantrums and the loss of the skilled miners I'm again good to go.
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WillowLuman

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6038 on: March 29, 2012, 02:30:53 am »

Trying to kill blizardmen or grimelings with my military. They keep beating and beating and stabbing and stabbing, but the bastards just wont die!
Also, what the hell are grimelings? They seem to be just these horrible... things. I want to try pitting them against husks
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Dwarf Souls: Prepare to Mine
Keep Me Safe - A Girl and Her Computer (Illustrated Game)
Darkest Garden - Illustrated game. - What mysteries lie in the abandoned dark?

Splint

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6039 on: March 29, 2012, 02:38:05 am »

Grimelings are maockeries of the plants elves love so much. Imagine a knot of tangled waterlogged rope reeds with a very bad attitude towards anything that isn't evil.

Garath

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6040 on: March 29, 2012, 03:52:40 am »

sounds like undead fortress overlord/overseer
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Quote from: Urist Imiknorris
Jam a door with its corpse and let all the goblins in. Hey, nobody said it had to be a weapon against your enemies.
Quote from: Frogwarrior
And then everyone melted.

Uggh

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6041 on: March 29, 2012, 05:38:54 am »

I got my first human caravan and intended to by some armour. But wait, armour comes in different sizes. So how do I list dwarf size armour in the trade screen? Ah yes, there is a "size" menu option, maybe this will do the trick...

Luckily, the humans came back the year thereafter and only to trade.
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Garath

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6042 on: March 29, 2012, 06:45:07 am »

hilarious.

humans only have human sized stuff anyway.
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Quote from: Urist Imiknorris
Jam a door with its corpse and let all the goblins in. Hey, nobody said it had to be a weapon against your enemies.
Quote from: Frogwarrior
And then everyone melted.

Findulidas

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6043 on: March 29, 2012, 08:44:51 am »

1.Embarked on a volcano, carefully dug out the magma channels and placed floodgates built out of a firesafe material inside them.
2.Built levers to control the floodgates, linked levers to floodgates.
3.Opened channels to lava, lava comes out dislodges the floodgates all four of them in each channel at the same time.
4.Dwarves go out and try to grab them even though its in the lava. Lost 4 dwarves due to bleeding before I realized what was going on, many more were very unhappy due to the smoke of the once burning dwarves and the deaths.

Quickly realized I had forgotten that the mechanisms should be magma safe as well. Grrrrr!
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...wonderful memories of the creeping sense of dread...

Count Dorku

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6044 on: March 29, 2012, 02:01:10 pm »

First fortress in the latest version:

"Waitasec, animals get hungry now?!"

"...I better check the wiki."

Previously to this, I managed to build a windmill two spaces to the left of where it was supposed to go. That won't power any drowning traps at all.
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"when in doubt, Magma"

Miners are diggin out nicely, everything will go right, i hope. hell, what am i even saying? this is dwarf fortress. it wont go right.
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