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Author Topic: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress  (Read 2207983 times)

Theifofdreams

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #5520 on: December 28, 2011, 06:03:09 pm »

Wait for the ghost, and let him haunt the moat as a reminder to your dwarves of the dangers of stupidity.
That's just asking for Urist McGhost to go rip Urist McUnlucky's arm off and try to force it down his throat.

orius

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #5521 on: December 29, 2011, 02:09:25 am »

My hunter was hunting a deer when the deer charged him.  The dumbass dodges the deer by jumping off a cliff into the river.  He can't swim, and the whole river runs through a ravine with cliff edges.  Needless to say, Urist McRedneck drowned on me.
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Jimmy T. Malice

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #5522 on: December 30, 2011, 04:22:05 pm »

I flooded three forts before I managed to properly irrigate a farm plot.

I walled off dangerous caverns only for cave beasts to sneak through a diagonal gap.
O<
<O

Not to mention walling in a dwarf when trying to seal off an external tunnel. Although that may be the dwarf's own fault...
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Urist McDorf cancels Pull lever: not that bloody stupid

Rockphed

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #5523 on: December 30, 2011, 04:52:12 pm »

Not to mention walling in a dwarf when trying to seal off an external tunnel. Although that may be the dwarf's own fault...

Dwarves wall, and dig, and do most things from the east first.  I think then they go clockwise around the wall on the rectangular directions, then on the diagonal directions(though walls and floors require a rectangular direction to go from).  So yes, it is your dwarf's fault.
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Only vaguely. Made of the same substance and put to the same use, but a bit like comparing a castle and a doublewide trailer.

MountainGnome

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #5524 on: December 31, 2011, 05:36:44 am »

"Are those goblins raining from the sky?  Why are they 3 levels above ground.  And why are they flashing like that?"

5min later.

"Oh crap oh crap oh crap!"

My first time getting to sieges.  My no marksdwarf military did not last long considering I only had an open wall protecting the entrance to my entire fort. :(
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MagmaSolutionsInc

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #5525 on: January 01, 2012, 05:09:46 am »

Brand new fort. I've been lucky enough to get some interesting caverns with this one, including a "Deep Pit". I'd already dug down to one part of the cavern at z -13, where there was a handy lake.

Across the other side of the lake, near the deep pit, the Forgotten Beast Anot appeared. A gigantic theropod with external ribs, it had two long curly tails and it undulated rhythmically. Its dark violet feathers were fluffed-out. We had to beware its hunger for warm blood.

I promptly dug down to it from ground level, since my militia had already seen off Aco Gasinsporro Corud Atup (Roc), Nonu Osmuzan Otar Mosmio (Giant), and Yonall Inevisethe Leriamu (Jungle Titan). Yonall was the first, and the worst  to date - went through an entire squad at first. Given how toughened they were by the experience, there was no sense in putting it off.

Disappointingly, Anot didn't last more than a single hit. Even Giant Cave Spiders have presented more of a challenge. And Forgotten Beast Biscuits taste funny.

So now to investigate the Deep Pit, since I was now on the "right side" of the lake. I dispatched my miners to dig stairs straight down the edge of the pit, into another cavern at z -31.

And promptly, Ak Sodoroson, Forgotten Beast, appeared. A towering scaly earthworm, it had thin wings of stretched skin and was slavering. Its flax scales were round and overlapping. We had to beware its webs. In any case, Ak wasted no time in climbing the newly carved stair case. An unsuspecting farmer, Ast Babinzuglar, was busily collecting webs right next to the pit. Ak Sodoroson, Forgotten Beast, drew itself up to its full height, roared menacingly with spikes of adamantine, rushed at the farmer ...

... who jumped away, just at the right time for Ak Sodoroson to plummet from level z -13 to -31. He's now being made into Forgotten Beast soap, or something equally useful.

*facepalm*
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kembial

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #5526 on: January 01, 2012, 06:56:14 am »

Worlds modded for simplicity, so I'm not sure if this is a STANDARD facepalm, or not.
I assume it somehow relates to my removal of non-exotic tamings.

I had just been stabilizing on the learning curve to the point where I was facing sieges fairly prepared. Passable military set up, trade/food/booze on overdrive, etc. Basically, no fails without invasions or drunken mistakes.

First siege was handled by the incoming caravan, before the military even had a chance to get a look at the invaders. No biggie, back to training.
Second siege was met face-to-face. Since my butchering was overloaded due to adequate learning, I wasn't sending the troops out to take down emergency rations, losing out on some experience. I lost a few dwarfs, here. Not a huge problem. I'm swimming in migrants for replacements.

This siege came with mounts, however, and about 5 jabberers fell to the cage traps. My trainer informed me jabberers can be TAMED. What he failed to tell me is that these tamed jabberers were still more than happy to slaughter everything in the high traffic stockpile/food production z-level instead of quietly being led out to chains at the entrance!

Facepalm #1

I learned that things caught in cages can still pwn my military with half a thought. And that it takes about 50 drafted peasants to punch threats to death.

By now, I've made the MAJOR MISTAKE that usually leads me to abandon and take a step up the learning curve. But I decided to let the fortress end in as much FUN as I could manage. I decided to apply magma.

Facepalm #2: When you a.) have completely mined multiple layers just to keep the miners busy, and b.) tap the magma pipe at every easily accessible layer... you have to wait YEARS for those boring, empty bottom layers to fill up before there's a serious threat. The only mentionable magma damage was to the prepared meals stockpile before the pipe level dropped and stopped flooding the fun z-levels.

Luckily, a third siege arrived and I let them in for a mercy killing.
By the way, children are awesome at hide-and-seek, delaying fortress collapses until they are completely pinned.

In the end, I'm not sure if my mistake was related to taming an INVADER, or something I can mod out for the future. I'll be pitting all siege captives until I find out.
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King DZA

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #5527 on: January 01, 2012, 03:14:13 pm »

Recently realized that Microcline has a second 'C' in it...

Roboboy33

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #5528 on: January 01, 2012, 03:59:56 pm »

I had an FB show up, and I thought, theres no way he can get in. Yet, I didnt know he could Swim, So while im off desinating stuff, hes rampaging in my fort. I notice, I see hes running outside, so I pull the bridge lever, trapping him outside along with some other grazers. So, Now I know FB's can swim. My war tiger lost its tail. I liked that tiger.
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Eidolon

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #5529 on: January 01, 2012, 07:24:51 pm »

I just dropped my miner down a volcano.
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starshard0

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #5530 on: January 01, 2012, 08:30:58 pm »

Recently realized that Microcline has a second 'C' in it...
Woah, I've been calling it Microline since forever!
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King DZA

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #5531 on: January 01, 2012, 09:58:33 pm »

Awesome, I'm not the only one, then! :D

Unfortunately, I have little idea how I'm supposed to pronounce it now....
« Last Edit: January 01, 2012, 10:00:42 pm by King DZA »
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BrandonKun

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #5532 on: January 02, 2012, 12:48:06 am »

Stupidly killed my Grower by removing a floor from a bridge underneath him.

Poor guy, fell 6 Z-Levels down a waterfall and fell into a brook, then was crushed by some remaining parts of the collapsed bridge.
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612DwarfAvenue

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #5533 on: January 02, 2012, 12:53:07 am »

Awesome, I'm not the only one, then! :D

Unfortunately, I have little idea how I'm supposed to pronounce it now....

My-crow-cline.

And i've always known it has the second C :P.
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BrandonKun

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #5534 on: January 02, 2012, 01:24:52 am »

Recently realized that Microcline has a second 'C' in it...
Haha, I had the same problem, I used to always say Microline.
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